Hey, take one guess: what's the worst place on the web for finding up-to-date news about Muni? That would be Muni's very own website, of course, which despite having a section for "new links" bears absolutely no mention of its new study showing that fifty percent of riders don't pay. Maybe Muni doesn't want anyone to know! ...Or maybe they didn't post that news because EVERYONE ALREADY KNEW. Nice work, Muni; what did you spend, like, several thousand dollars to figure out the obvious? Maybe next you'll do a study to investigate the possibility that sometimes, drivers can be surly.

Anyway, about that study: Clandestine fare inspectors (we're imagining Clouseau in a Groucho moustache) at subway stations watched 53 to 73 percent of riders conduct gymnastics over, under, around, and through the turnstiles. Nobody's ever in those glass booths, of course, so even if you wanted to pay there's nobody to give money to. Our question: why on Earth weren't there fare inspectors at the bottom of the escalator waiting to hand out tickets to the evaders? Even when they're doing a study on how they lose money, they continue to miss out on even MORE money. Jesus.

The best part of The Examiner's article is a quote by Muni's official apologist Maggie Lynch: “People think paying their $1 doesn’t matter, but it does." That's nice. Does paying the additional 50 cents matter, too, or is that optional? Because the fare hasn't been $1 for a long time, you know, Maggie. Sigh. We can't help but wonder how Muni might improve if the people in charge of it actually rode it every once in a while.