Drinking and shopping? Sounds harmless! Or does it....? Find out for yourself at GenArt's first SF spring shopping event. Over 40 local vendors are offering discounted wares for the ladies and the fellows, with a fashion show, bevvys and music. 6-10pm, $10 for non-members. ShopSF at the Galleria, San Francisco Design Center, 101 Henry Adams St., SF.

Fe in the Desert, a new play by Jessica Hagedorn about a woman struggling to make sense of her broken marriage set in the isolated American desert premiers at Intersection for the Arts at 8pm. Tickets are on a sliding scale. Can't make it tonight? The play runs through June 25. 446 Valencia, SF.

Rub elbows with the Web 2.0 Bay Area up-and-comers at SF Beta. Tonight's event includes company demos, tasty apps and a cash bar for cocktails. RSVP and get discounted tickets here. 111 Minna, SF.

Swing by and have a drink to benefit Bay Area independent radio station Beat Sauce, a KUSF show on every Sunday from 6-8pm. DJs J-Boogie, Wisdom and Raw B host the show and will emcee tonight's event - which is sure to include several special guests and live performances. $5 gets you in the door before 11 at Poleng Lounge, 1751 Fulton St., SF.

Photo from Beat Sauce MySpace page.

We really love these guys, and you should love them too! The Del Sol Quartet performs works by 20th and 21st century women composers in Berkeley tonight (and one male composer too) in their "Umbilical Chords: Women Composers and the Creative Process" program. And in interesting modern music trivia, one of the women composers (Ruth Crawford) is folk singer Pete Seeger's mother. Del Sol plays at the Ashby Stage (1901 Ashby, x MLK, right across from the Ashby BART), $20, 8 p.m. They'll also be playing at the DeYoung this Sunday and the SF Main Library next Tuesday.

Other events:
--Always mean to get out to Orinda to see the summer Shakespeare? This year, it's Richard III, and tonight's preview is the first performance. $32 for tonight, and prices will go up once the show starts up for real. (However, for certain shows, folks under 30 can get $30 $15 tickets, and half-price rush tickets always become available 30 minutes before the show.)

--Assuage the guilt of not having read the book by reading it with people who don't know you, at the Books Inc. in the Marina's "Classics I Forgot To Read" book club. This month's book is The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler. 7:30 p.m., 2251 Chestnut (x Scott).

--A movie screening of Only Human, a comedy about family misunderstandings between Israelis and Palestinians at the Yerba Buena Film Center, as part of the SF Jewish Film Forum. $8, 7:30, 701 Mission (x 3rd).

--It's open mic night at Blondie's! Yikes! Signups by 6:30, performances at 7:30 and it goes until closing. 540 Valencia (x 16th).

--Get In Bed with Fairy Butch, with the queer-positive pro-sex erotic cabaret, with a speed dating session. 8 pm for the speed dating, 9 p.m. for the show, $10-20 sliding, and at the Rickshaw Stop (155 Fell, x Van Ness).

--And Paint It Purple happy hour fundraiser for the American Cancer Society at R Bar. $10 donation gets you $1 bud and $3 shots -- plus, there's going to be a raffle and the Tamale Lady may make an appearance! 6:30-9:30 p.m., 1176 Sutter (x Polk).

Don't let the grind get you down after the holiday weekend! Here are a few ways to keep the party going around the Bay:

Thunderdome + amateur hour = guerilla theater at its finest! A survival-of-the-fittest style open mic night, Spass Guerilla! showcases all kinds of local performance art for a night that's guaranteed to be...interesting. 12 Galaxies, 2565 Mission, SF.

Part of a monthly series, Tell it on Tuesday, promotes the art of storytelling. Tonight's selection includes a performance by Zoe Sheli Sameth called Temporary Illusion, that details a woman's travels through Sri Lanka at the beginning of the country's still on-going civil war. Tickets are a sliding scale of $8-$12, show starts at 7:30 (but get there at 7 for a live music performance). Julia Morgan Center for the Arts, 2640 College Ave, Berkeley.

Bummed about the cancelled Electrelane show? Check out local and traveling, indie, pop, folk and rock Americana bands at the monthly semi-acoustic showcase known as the Penny Arcade. At the The Make-out Room, 9pm. 3225 22nd Street, SF.

A hundred woodblock prints from the 19th century, by Taiso Yoshitoshi are on view at the Asian Art Museum. Woodblocks are often considered to be an ancestor to modern manga and Yoshitoshi's prints touch on subjects such as the supernatural, folkloric tales and human emotions. 200 Larkin St., SF.

Photo from Yoshitoshi's Strange Tales exhibit.

Happy Memorial Day! Here's some stuff to do if you're not barbecuing.

Hey, remember that interview that SFist Rain did with Mystery Science Theater 3000's Mike Nelson last week, about his new project, Rifftrax? Download an .mp3 of the MST3K folks and play it while watching its corresponding mainstream movie! GENIUS. Well, you can see Mike yourself at RiffTrax Live tonight -- they won't say what movie's going to be screening (all we've got is that the star has a Bacon number of 2), but January's commentary on Daredevil was apparently awesome. 8 p.m., $25, Cobb's Comedy Club at 915 Columbus (x Lombard).

Other events:

--Honor America's fallen soldiers at the Memorial Day ceremony in the Presidio. Parade at 10:30 a.m. at the Presidio Main Parade ground, memorial service at the Presidio cemetary at 11 a.m.

--It's Porchlight story time again with Beth Lisick and Arline Klatte. This month's theme: food. Cafe du Nord (2170 Market, x 15th/Sanchez), 8 p.m., $12.

--Jazz and Indian dance at CounterPulse. 6 p.m., $18, 1310 Mission (x 9th).

--The Gnar-B-Cue fest at Mama Buzz Cafe -- various bands playing, plus bring your own meat/veg for the grill! 3-9 p.m, $5, 2318 Telegraph (x 23rd) in Oakland. Also, at 7 - free tarot card readings.

Mike Nelson with Mary Jo Pehl as Mariah in Glitter.

Don't forget it's still Carnaval! But you can check out the following events today too.

--Free opera in Dolores Park! 2 p.m., with a number of singers singing various operatic greatest hits. (YouTube clip from last year's performance, we think.)

--The youth dancers of the City Ballet School perform "Carnival of the Animals" at the Cowell Theater at Fort Mason, at 2 p.m. $23.50.

--A night of free Asian-American comedy at the GlasKat. 7 p.m., 520 Fourth St. (x Bryant).

--Jazz concert with the faculty and students of the Community Music Center at the Savannah Jazz Club on Mission and 25th. Jazz starts at 4:30, and if you stick around, they've got salsa at 8:30. Free, but a one-drink minimum.

--Take a walking tour on a boat of the quarters of the Chinese fishermen who used to sail from SF to Alaska for salmon runs. 1 p.m., the San Francisco Maritime National Park (Fisherman's Wharf, at the end of Hyde Street), $5.

Well, you could either go to Carnaval this weekend -- or you could go to the State Green Party Convention. Ross Mirkarimi (seen here going into the dunk tank) is giving the keynote address, and the delegates plan to debate issues like ranked-choice voting, lowering the voting age to 17, and immigration. They may also get to issues about global warming. The convention starts at 11:30 a.m., goes through the Memorial Day weekend and is mostly at the State Building at 455 Golden Gate (x Larkin), though if you make it through all the sessions, they're doing a hike in Muir Woods on Monday. You have to pay to go, but the cost is, mysteriously, not listed on the website.

Other events:

--There's some genre-bending rock/jazz/classical afoot at the Lab with the Moe! kestra large ensemble. 2948 16th St. (x Capp), 8:30 p.m., $8-12.

--It's the 10th Annual Dionysian Dance Festival, featuring Isadora Duncan style dancers, classical Indian dances, and Japanese butoh dance, all in honor of Isadora Duncan's 130th birthday. 245 5th Street (x Folsom), $16, 8 p.m.

--An opera about Emperor Norton. Legion of Honor, 2 p.m., tickets starting at $18.

--A performance of African diaspora music inspired by the 200th anniversary of the end of slavery in Great Britain at the Brava Theater. 2781 24th Street (x York), $25, 8 p.m.

--An all-male revue! SF Boylesque, $10-15 sliding, 8 p.m., Shotwell Studios at 3252A 19th Street (x Folsom).

--And a musical performance at the city dump! The dump's artist in residence, Nathaniel Stookey, performs "Junkestra," a musical piece written for instruments made out of discarded material, at 3 p.m. sharp (be there 15 minutes early). It looks free! 503 Tunnel Ave. (directions here).

Picture from Ross Mirkarimi's Flickr account.

Here's what on tonight around the city - assuming you survive the Zombie Mob Invasion...

Carnaval weekend in SF jumps off at the Great American Music Hall, with Sila and the Afro Funk Experience. Afro-Brazilian, Afro-Funk, Afro-Latin beats get the party going right, starting at 10 pm. Tickets are $18, 859 O'Farrell Street, SF.

Emerging San Francisco fashion designs show off their wares at the De Young tonight.Designers Jasmin Zorlu, Gregory Sovik, Antonio Luna, Brenna Dean and Thomas Haryanto each present their unique collections set to the tune of local DJs. And while you're in the house pay a visit to the Westwood exhibit (if you haven't already). Tickets are $15 (and include drinks). Event starts at 5pm, 50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Drive, SF.

Ra-ra-ra Rabbit, The Don'ts and The Trifles perform at 10pm, The Knockout!, 3223 Mission St.

New work by Michelle Blade at Park Life. The opening reception for her first solo exhibition in SF begins at 6pm, and will mostly include large scale paintings exploring Blade's idea on how trust works in a group dynamic. 220 Clement St., SF.

Happy hour with Justin.tv, our own lifecaster (he wears a camera strapped to his head 24/7). Come hang out with free drinks and then hurry home to see yourself on his website. Dragon Bar, 473 Broadway, SF.

Photo from GAMH Carnaval event flyer

Can you still remember how to roller skate backwards? How about shoot the duck? For $2 skate rentals, you can give it your best shot at Mighty to the tune of really bad (or really good, depending on how you look at it) disco music. 7pm, 119 Utah Street, SF.

Drink your way through San Jose's historic Japantown at Sake San Jose, a tasting tour of downtown San Jo. Sample the sake offering from several local businesses, from 5:30 - 8:30 pm. Buy tickets in advance & get more info here. 588 N. Fourth Street , San Jose, CA

Derby girls (and their fans) unite! Come raise money for the Bay Area Derby Girls at DNA Lounge. Bombshell Betty, Bottoms up! Burlesque http://bottomsupburlesque.com/and the Devil-etts are some of the acts appearing tonight. Tickets are $15 at the door, show till 2am. 375 11th Street, SF.

Yerba Buena presents a showing of the 1994 film Crumb by Terry Zwigoff. Film starts at 7:30 pm, tickets are $8. 701 Mission St, SF.

Michale Graves (of the Misfits), Oakland punk group Maxwell Adams and more at Red Devil Lounge. Tickets $15 at the door, which opens at 7:30pm. 1695 Polk Street, SF.

Ladies Night at City Hall presented by Project Women Connect. Come speak out for more funding for homeless women at Civic Center Plaza, 4-7pm. For more info, call Julie 415.869.7977 x 1010

The acclaimed French-trained Guinean contemporary circus troupe Circus Baobab makes its US debut as part of the SF Int'l Arts Festival, performing The Jumping Drum, a fable about globalization and family, complete with acrobatics, stilt-walking, and African music. 5:30 p.m., $30, Project Artaud Theater (450 Alabama, x Mariposa). They're here through Sunday, and you may find it intriguing to learn that tomorrow's performance is in French. That's them on the YouTube above.

Other events:

--There's a lot of speakers! Hyper-literate NY Times science writer Natalie Angier speaks at the Commonwealth Club (595 Market 2nd Floor x 2nd St.) at 6 p.m., $18; the YouTube boys speak at the Hotel Nikko (222 Mason x Ellis) at 6:30 p.m., $25 starting.

--If you find all that talking too quiet, check out the experimental dance music videos screening at the Lab at 7:30 p.m. $5-10 sliding scale, 2948 16th St. (x Capp).

--Head over to Oakland, say hi to SFist Sarah L, and check out the Gianni Gebbia Septet at 21 Grand. Saxophones, keyboards, drums -- Is it jazz? (SFist Sarah L, help!) 8 p.m. $6-10 sliding, 416 25th St. Oakland (x Broadway).

--And Josh Kornbluth's one-man show Citizen Josh continues to play at the Magic Theater in Fort Mason Bldg. D. 8:30 p.m., $31.

Who needs a little culture after a weekend of mayhem? (We do, we do!) Here are a few things going on tonight that might pique your interest.

Spring Art Auction at Mezzanine
Visual Aid and Academy of Friends presents the sixth annual spring art auction to benefit locals AIDS service organizations, with cocktails, wine from Napa and hors'd oeuvres before the live auction. Over 50 works of art were donated by well-known artists, galleries and luxury businesses (think a baby grand piano, airline tickets, holiday travel, jewelry and more).Get there by 6pm, tickets are $50 a pop, but hey, all proceeds from the evening will go to support 15 Bay Area HIV/AIDS service organizations. 444 Jessie Street, SF.

A few more to choose from:

Wine tasting at Circa restaurant, hosted by The City Dish kicks off at 5:30 for an early happy hour with a selection of wines from a selection of boutique wineries and light appetizers. Buy tickets in advance for $20 each. 2001 Chestnut Street, SF.

Organic Indian Cooking Class
Ever wanted to learn how to whip up Channa Masala, Jeera pilaf, and a fresh Mango Lassi? Head out to a class in Cupertino to learn how to make a light, all organic summery meal. Classes are held from 6:30 - 8pm and you'll want to register in advance to guarantee your spot.

Art from Spring Art Auction event site

It's Sunset Magazine's Celebration Weekend! (For some reason, Sunset Magazine sent this event to our sister site Phillyist instead of us, and Phillyist was kind enough to forward it along.) Stop by their "publishing grounds" at 80 Willow Road in Menlo Park from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. for a smorsgasbord of Western-lifestyle events, like live music, cooking events with celeb chefs like Paul Bertolli, a home tour, and -- the main reason why we're into this in the first place, sample their newly-created drink, the Sunset-Rita. Is that like SFist Rita?

Other events:

--Bowling for Rhinos! It's like the name of some kind of ska band, but it's actually a benefit for the zoo. $25 gets you two hours of bowling and pizza at Pacifica's SeaBowl, and all the money goes to rhinoceros preservation efforts in Africa and Asia. Register here, or just show up. 6 p.m., Sea Bowl (off Highway 1 in Pacifica).

--The SFMoMA screens Nazi apologist and film auteur Leni Riefenstahl's Olympia film about the 1936 Berlin Olympics, as part of their Martin Munkacsi 1930s-40s German photography exhibit. $7 (and you have to get museum admission, though BofA customers get in free this month), showings at 1:30 and 4:30, 151 Third (x Mission).

--Hey! It's SFist Jon's favorite musical! Hair is showing at the Mountain Theater at Mt. Tam State Park. Show starts at 1 p.m., but there's a fiddle concert earlier if you'd interested. $35, and here's directions to the park.

--Flamenco dancing at ODC. 7 p.m., $20-$15-$12, 3153 17th Street (x S. Van Ness).

--And where does the SF Weekly get all these great listings? They tip us off about an event featuring poetry, short stories, and performance art about the male organ. The Mark Chester Studio (check out that crochet art!) at 1229 Folsom (x 8th), $10 donation requested, 8 p.m.

May's Asian-American Heritage Month, so of course there's an accompanying street fair to emphasize the fun! Stop by Howard Street between 5th and 7th any time between 11 a.m. and 6 for food, music, community awareness booths, and fun across all the Asian ethnic groups.

Other events:

--SF Women Against Rape present the documentary "NO!" at the Women's Building. 5-7:30 p.m., $5-$15 sliding scale, Audre Lorde Room, 3542 18th St. (x Valencia).

--Bohemian Carnival -- like the Bohemian Rhapsody, only except it's an "indie circus orgy" and the flyer is illustrated with a crazy dude in mime makeup with red question marks on his face. Okay, it's not really like Bohemian Rhapsody. 9 p.m., DNA Lounge (375 11th St., x Harrison), $15.

--The Kearny Street Workshop and the API Cultural Center present "The Best of APAture," an evening featuring Asian-American performers of all stripes. Tonight's lineup features singers, filmmakers, and poets. SomArts Theater (934 Brannan x 8th), 8 p.m., $16.

--Women singing American show tunes at the Noe Valley Ministry. 8 p.m., $10, 1021 Sanchez (x 23rd).

--And if you're at SFO, there's aerial dancers from the Zaccho Theater performing a piece about the African diaspora from 8:30 - 10 p.m. (in 4 thirty minute shifts), at the International Terminal, as part of the SF Int'l Arts Festival. Free (and the quickest way to get to the Int'l Terminal is just to take BART and walk directly into the airport).

This weekend is gonna be ginormous, with Bay to Breakers,the Maker Faire, the Prince and Bjork shows - so dive right on in with tonight's top picks:

Party with Viv! and celebrate the Jolika Collection at the de Young.
Experience the art of the Polynesian islands, from 5-8:45. Sample Kiwi wines from 6-8pm and stay to check out a live dance performance by a professional Maori dance company at 8. The Vivienne Westwood exhibit will stay open until 8:45pm. Admission to the exhibit is free for members, and tickets are available at the bargain cost of $10 for non-members. Golden Gate Park, 50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Drive, SF.

And after the de Young throwdown, head to:

Fat City's (formerly Studio Z) queer dance party Cockblock starts around 9 or so, 314 Folsom St., SF.

?uestlove, drummer for The Roots, will be spinning with DJ Riz at Fluid tonight, 662 Mission Street, SF.

Indie darlings The Sea and Cake perform at Bimbo's 365, tickets cost $20, show starts at 9pm.

Photo of ?uestlove from his MySpace page.

Everyone else is getting their swerve on (dang, that light IS bright!) so we're jumping on the bandwagon. Here's where to go for the steamy haps tonight:

Singles events are always awkward, but you've got it easy tonight with a killer line - Did you ride your bike to work today? Head over the supperclub for Date My Friend where the only (mandatory) catch tonight is that every attendee is single. $10 will get you in the door, 657 Harrison, SF.

Or just go straight to Gestalt Haus in the Mission for the unofficial Ride Your Bike to Work after party, to celebrate being an eco-friendly commuter. $2 pints from now until 7pm. Just be careful on the ride home! 3159 16th Street, SF.

If you're really on the prowl, head over to Ruby Skye around 7pm for to bid on sexy studs, at the Guardsmen Bachelor Auction. Tickets cost $25 but who can put a price on a hot date? Free drinks too! 420 Mason, SF.

And safe is always sexy at the Planned Parenthood Golden Gate annual gala. Dig out your fancy pants, cause this gig is at the Ritz! And don't forget your wallet, tickets start at $250 each. But hey, dinner is by Traci des Jardins, of Jardiniere, there will be plenty of top shelf booze, a big bed you can have your photo taken in and a silent auction with prizes like a weekend in Italy. 600 Stockton, SF.

Well, all of San Francisco politics is trivial, isn't it? Get that confirmed at tonight's 4th Annual Political Trivia Contest, featuring Chris "Whiskers" Daly, Ross Mirkarimi, and Jake McGoldrick, at a benefit for the John Muir PTA, for a spelling bee for the Western Addition. Categories of questions include: "Streets (and Transportation) of San Francisco," "Interesting Characters of San Francisco," and, in a bracing slap of reality, "Only Trivia That A Policy Wonk Would Know." $5, 7-9 p.m., Temple Bar, 800 Polk (x Turk), $5. Oooh, we hope SFist is featured in the questions! "Give one of the fake names that Peter Ragone posted under on SFist.com."

Other events:

--Speaking of Peter Ragone fake's names, the band Peter Bjorn and John play tonight at Bimbo's. $20, 8 p.m., 1025 Columbus (x Chestnut). We hope Mr. Ragone and Mr. John Nelson make an appearance! (We still don't know who "byorn" is.) Video above.

--Filmmaker and polymath Miranda July is reading from her debut short story collection at Modern Times, 8 p.m., 888 Valencia (x 20th St.), free.

Got events you want to see here? Send them to editor -at- sfist.com! More events after the jump.

Monday nights are the Contemporary Jazz Orchestra Big Band nights at North Beach mainstay Jazz at Pearl's. They play the classic jazz orchestra works (Ellington, Mingus) and also some hard bop. Two shows (one at 8, one at 10), $15 + 2-drink minimum, 256 Columbus (x Pacific).

Other events:

--Salsa and swing dance lessons at Julie's Supper Club, with burlesque performers on the hour. 8-11 p.m., $6 after 8 p.m. (half hour lesson), $10 by 7 (with an hour-long lesson). 1123 Folsom (x 7th).

--Annette Bening speaks at City Arts and Lectures. Geary Theater (415 Geary, x Mason), 8 p.m., $25.

--There's an Iron Chef-like cookoff at Macy's tonight, between Kunihiro Kinda (of Hime) and Joseph Manzare (Zuppa). 6:30 p.m., Macy's, $10, but you get a $10 Macy's gift card in exchange.

--The Red Vic's showing Pee Wee's Big Adventure! 7:15 and 9:15 showings, 1727 Haight (x Shrader), $8.50.

--And we're kind of taken by this description of tonight's Artists' Television Access/Mission Creek Film Fest event: "a dense sludge of math, swamp of sound, and truffle of electricity."

It's Bad Movie Night at the Dark Room SF! Every Sunday night, they screen some terrible-sounding movie with some wisecracking hosts and free popcorn. May is Razzies Month, where they'll screen the 2006 worst-movie nominees, and tonight's featured movie is Little Man, where Shawn Wayans plays a midget criminal pretending to be a baby. That looks awful. 2263 Mission (x 18th), 8 p.m., $5.

Other events:

--Belly dancers, including local troupe Fat Chance Belly Dance, perform at the Mighty tonight with dancer Ansuya. 8:30 p.m., 119 Utah (x 15th), $15.

--Buy Mom an orchid at the OrchidMania sale today. Ft. Mason, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., admission is free. Money goes to benefit HIV education.

--Open studios for Mission-based artists! 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. at a number of studios between Mission, 17th Street, and Potrero (check here for studio listings.)

--Free band concert at Golden Gate Park, 1 p.m. in the concourse right outside the DeYoung Museum.

--Fresh oysters at the Academy of Sciences! 1-3 p.m., 875 Howard Street (x 5th), $10 admission.

Our head is areel with all the options for fun this afternoon! Here's a partial list:

--Are you one of those people who says, when people ask you how old you are, "29 for the fourth time"? Well, if you are, and you're in the Marina today, Outside Magazine is holding a "Stay 30 Forever" event at the Marina Green from 11 a.m to 4 p.m. Free yoga, body fat testing, a speech by a vegan athlete, and folks selling outdoor gear. Birth certificate alterations not included.

--For those of you on the other side of Market, hop on that fixie bike and help celebrate Ritual Roasters' second anniversary by checking out their second store in the Bayview! Inside plant store Flora Grubb Garden's new location on 1634 Jerrold Ave (x Third), there's a happy birthday celebration at 1 p.m. today. Print this flyer out (.pdf) for two cups of coffee for the price of one at the new locations.

--And as we've already told you -- there's a book swap this afternoon, a craft fair, and a party for the John Barleycorn. Saturday afternoons in San Francisco are the best.

Picture from the SFist Flickr stream of the O.R.R. (Original Ritual Roasters), by exuberance.com. Go out today, take some pictures, and tag 'em SFist too!

Droll NPR commentator (who was previously fired for cursing) Sandra Tsing Loh brings her one-woman show, "Mother On Fire," to the Women's Building tonight! For a 9 night run!

The show's about her travails trying to find an appropriate school for her kindergarten age daughter in the California school system and ran for 7 months in LA. Here's the one-liner. "I looked at public schools, private schools, parochial schools -- even Baptist school. It turns out tuition-wise, Creationism is cheap." Yay! It's a benefit for Mission High and for the Women's Building, so tickets are $20 ($5 off per child if you have kids in the public schools, $10 for teachers). 8 p.m. at the Women's Building (3543 18th, btw Valencia and Guerrero).

Other events tonight:

--Clients of The Arc of San Francisco, an advocacy group for the developmentally disabled, are putting on an adapted production of Grease. 7 p.m., 1500 Howard Street (x 11th), suggested donation $5.

--The SF Symphony's performing the music from 2001: A Space Odyssey (Also Sprach Zarathustra -- interpreted by trombones, here). 8 p.m., Symphony Hall (Van Ness and Grove), $25-114.

--Punk rock knitting at Booksmith in the Haight. 7 p.m., 1644 Haight (x Cole), free.

--Hipster fave Ritual Roasters is hosting an art opening tonight for painter Rachel Major -- paintings of cakes and knives! 7-9 p.m.,1026 Valencia (between 21st and 22nd), and free (though you might as well get some coffee too while you're there.)

--Full-bodied contemporary dance from the peck peck dance ensemble at CounterPulse. $15-25, 8 p.m., 1310 Mission (x 9th).

--Arists' Television Access is screening Baccanale, a surrealistic 1970s porn with music rescored by 50 audio artists. Wicky-wicky-baugh-baugh! Part of the Mission Creek Film Fest. $6, 8 p.m., 992 Valencia (x 21st).

Rant
Chuck Palahniuck will be at sponsored by Booksmith tonight around 7 pm, reading from and signing his latest book, Rant, about a serial killer who's weapon of choice is...rabies. Booksmith, Park Branch Library,
1833 Page St., SF.

Garden of Deadly Delights
Head over to the Conservatory of Flowers to feast your eyes on a greenhouse full of carnivorous plants! Chomp! opens today and runs through Nov 4.

The Red Party
A socialist themed party with Cold War decor set to minimalist funky house music? We don't even know what that means, but we're there! May Day Party at 1015 with SF's own Mike Relm and Evil 9 on the turntables. Buy tickets before 7pm tonight and only pay $15 cover. 1015 Folsom, SF.

Saturday, May 5
Celebrate Cinco de Mayo in style!
Wine Auction
Get your booze on before hitting the streets to party at The 31st Annual Wine Auction at the Westin St. Francis. Come for the opportunity to bid on 75 silent auction items and 50 live auction items with prices ranging from $100 to $75,000. Fancy! Black tie affair starts at 7:30, with a three-course dinner by Michael Mina.
Wine Auction, 335 Powell Street

Alternate Soundtrack City Tours
Cinco de Mayo @ SoEX Bring your boom boxes (or rent one!) and enjoy the sights and sounds of the Cinco De Mayo festival with a musical soundtrack from local musicians as you follow a map that helps you explore the many ways that the Mission celebrates its Mexican and Latino heritage. Southern
Exposure, 2901 Mission St. @ 25th Street, SF.

Sunday, May 6
How Weird!
Dig out your fur boots, sequined top and hot pink hair extension for this year's How Weird Street Faire! And feel good while you get down -- all seven dance stages will be run on bio-diesel this year and the faire will be almost zero waste! This year's event runs from 11 am to
5, so get there early. How Weird, Howard Street, between 11th and 12th Streets.

By SFist Jenna