(By Eyleen Tavy) Yikes! It wasn't enough that certain Yelpers lost their collective shit that local user-review site Yelp's bounced a bunch of users who were basically trading positive reviews, but now we have local waiter Michael Procopio (or is this a Sasha Baron Cohen piece, we just don't get? We ask because, look at his picture: Hello, Bruno!) announcing that "many opinions expressed on sites like Yelp are neither well-informed nor, as is......

We enjoy the following review -- although we're only using part of it for it devolves into anti-Hillary rhetoric, San Francisco's latest form of socially-acceptable sexism -- because a) it turns out that Yelp has an entire category dedicated to Gavin Newsom's hair, and b) it's pro-Gavin Newsom locks. (If you want to see some actual janky-ass hair, walk down Valencia Street or sit on a bench at Zeitgeist on any given day. Because:......

Sent to us by SFist reader Sean Yamamoto, today's Yelp review was penned by Beth S. (Please excuse the glaring nepotism.) She critiques Owen Bias, i.e., the "old dude with the sign," saying: I've fucked him. And it was awesome. He's surprisingly nasty, yet afterwards, incredibly tender. He likes to spoon. 5 stars... Wonderful.......

One star to a yoga place in the Haight. The entire review: I had to wake up at 5pm to pick up the manatee here. I am tired and cranky. Besides this place already has a crappy rating. Heh. Speaking of which, SFist readers, send us your favorite Yelp review. If we get enough, we'll start posting our favorite review of the day. So, please, send us ones that are curt and clever, not......