It's our week up on the weekly-reading duties! Last week's winner from SFist Sarah L, the SF Weekly. A letter writer says: "While Matt [Gonzalez] may not be the next Picasso (but don't count him out)..." It doesn't matter what the rest of the letter says. The SF Fire Department gave a bad test. Cover article: We hate baby boomers and their dirty self-centered hippie ways. Carnivorous plants! Yay, the SFIFF! A flyer fell out......

Congratulations to Cement Brunette for winning our Second Gavin Caption Contest, with the entry: San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom and girlfriend Sofia Milos seen rehearsing their "I've Had The Time of My Life" Dirty Dancing number for the upcoming California Democratic Convention variety show.. Ha! In other news, we saw some more movies for the SFIFF, including the controversial The Bridge, about suicides off the Golden Gate Bridge. We also saw the Yeah Yeah Yeahs,......

Shanghaiist probably knows a little more about China than the Chicago Sun-Times. Giving them the benefit of the doubt on that one. The city does to have a music scene. Don't even front like they don't. They also have Dorito bananas and white guys shopping for wives. What they don't have is any more tolerance for jaywalkers. Bostonist sees Boston and Somerville each whip out their art and face off. A plagiarized novel is the......

We've wanted to see the Yeah Yeah Yeahs for awhile now but haven't been able to make it to a show. Day early, dollar short as they say. But when we heard advance word that they were going to be at the Warfield for a two-set show, we made a mental note and dutifully logged online at about 10:30 the morning the tickets went onsale to get tickets.. Finally, after several years of wanting to see the band, we had tickets to go see them. We wish we had seen them earlier. ...

Last week's winner, the Guardian: Hey, we've received late-breaking word of some layoffs at the Bay Area's Oldest Alternative Newspaper. Hope you guys are all doing okay. Onto the pre-layoff news: It's the Freedom of Information issue! Hey, here's some free information -- the Guardian laid off some people. Slumlords, first in a three-part series. Cover: FOIA, FOIA, FOIA. Vanessa Hua gets some love for breaking the Kevin Shelley story. RIP, Octavia Butler. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs are so much better than No Doubt! New DVD magazine by McSweeney's. Bars and Clubs insert: how to open your own bar, and barronista gossip. And SFist Eve's horoscope: a gust of wind could destroy your potential this week, so proteck ya neck! (don't feel bad, SFist Eve, our horoscope says that our inner fears have paralyzed us. Why, we can hardly move our fingers to type this post!) Next, the East Bay Express: Bottom Feeder! A collection of funny Jerry Brown quotes, and an update on the social worker that let a teenager slash an old lady's throat in Berkeley. Ferries aren't really going to save us in an earthquake, are they? (no.) Cover: using citrus-based anti-bacterial lotions to stop AIDS (really!). Chinese buffets. Rob Harvilla warns about the dangers of Dem Franchise Boyz's song "Lean wit It, Rock with it": "If you lean wit it at the exact moment the person behind you chooses to rock wit it, you may collide and knock each other unconscious." That wins the prestigious "sentence of the alternative week" award! And trendy band alert: Arctic Monkeys. And hey, the SF Weekly's Nate Cavalieri shows up across the bay! Lean wit the SF Weekly, rock wit the Metro, after the jump. Also, the weekly of the week!...

March music madness is upon us, with SXSW happening in Austin mid-month (this SFist will be covering) and the Noise Pop Festival starting at the end of the month. Start your own music marathon this Saturday at the Rickshaw Stop when Mesh Magazine kicks off its third year with a party featuring The Herms, Tussle, The Ebb and Flow, DJs, artwork and more. We're giving away two tickets to the extravaganza. (We'll pick a winner......