Number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 101. Number of people pictured whom we recognize: 5 (including Rita Moreno, Justice Harry Low, and Wonder Woman). Minority count: 18 (about 18%) -- there's a benefit for the Chinese-American Int'l School this week. Hats, scarves and wraps, tiaras: 6 (including a big Beach Blanket Babylon one), 6, 0. Getty v. Traina: 5-0. Number of Gettys pictured that are actually Gavin Newsom: 4. Number of......

Remember that totally awesome scene in Return of the King where the Witch King was leaving Cirith Ungol with the Orc army and Frodo started freaking out and then that big shaft of light shot out of the building as the people of Minas Tirith looked on with a dread that something great and terrible was coming? Replace Minas Morgul with the Moscone Center, the Witch King with Kevin Smith, and put a "d"......

The media orgasmatron following Prince Charles and Duchess Camilla through their edge-free trip to San Francisco peed itself the other night as the royals on-deck chortled their way through that old chestnut, Beach Blanket Babylon. "Prince is Charming!" "Prince of a Guy!" "This Prince doesn't go by an unpronounceable symbol!" (okay, we made that last one up.) A whole coterie of hangers-on attended the soiree, including Duke Gavin and the fallen Lady Kimberly of Guilfoyle, smiling and bobbing slightly as the royals passed, but not holding hands. Gavin -- you must start seeing other people. Other attendees included former Secretary of State George Shultz (in his role as the husband of Charlotte Maillard Shultz, the Chief of SF protocol), Kamala Harris, the owner of the Giants, Willie Brown, and Danielle Steel. Mrs. Shultz also apparently made a cameo in the show, flying on a wire and dressed as Wonder Woman. Ah, of course. Prince Charles didn't seem to get most of the jokes, but apparently chuckled at a bit involving men dressed as poodles. And what would a visit to SF be without a protest? Giving it that special SF flavor, Medea Benjamin and Code Pink marched outside the theater, in pink wigs and chanting, "UK out of Iraq." Maybe the Prince would have paid more attention if they'd dressed as poodles instead. Picture by Chris Stewart of the Chron. That hat is so rad....

There was never any doubt that SFist was going to pick a gay-related charity organization for our Cares column this week. Not that we heard about anything going on this weekend and wanted to be timely. Except, which organization? San Francisco rocks the world in resources for our LGBTQ citizens. Life isn't perfect, but if you identify with one of those letters you could definitely live in worse cities. So, a hard choice obviously.......

For those of you not familiar with 70s comic book turned TV show turned movie Cutie Honey, imagine a completely non-ironic present-day Wonder Woman film, and you'll be pretty close. (tangentially, we noted that is was just announced that Joss Whedon will helm the real upcoming Wonder Woman film -- yahoo!) Imagine the super-girl that all the boys loved and the girls wanted to be during their childhood, and make a movie for them......

For those who were totally underwhelmed by last week's DVD picks, we got bad news- it's even less exciting this week. How exciting? One of the featured DVDs this week is the first season of 21 Jump Street. Personally, we're not even sure if this week is even worth a post, but as this is a new regular feature on SFist, we gotta post. So if you're really desperate to buy something, here's what's new......