Dear AlertSF, Why do you yell at us? You've done this to us five times today already, and we still don't understand you with the greatest clarity. To wit: The National Weather Service reports/updated a Winter Storm Watch for the San Francisco area. ...SNOW ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 4 AM PST THURSDAY FOR THE TULARE COUNTY MOUNTAINS... ...WINTER STORM WATCH IN EFFECT FROM THURSDAY AFTERNOON THROUGH FRIDAY AFTERNOON FOR THE TULARE COUNTY MOUNTAINS.........

We received three urgent text messages since 9 a.m. this morning from SFAlert, claiming that "the National Weather Service reports/updated a High Wind Watch for the San Francisco area." Strange. We see no blustery weather or airborne British nannies in the distance. Anyway, just a weather warning, y'all.......

Be careful if you're having Thanksgiving dinner near the coast tomorrow. Because if you plan on strolling down the beach afterwards to walk off that dark meat sitting in the pit of your stomach -- does anyone really prefer white meat? why? -- you might get swept to sea. Unusually high swells could reach up to eight feet over the holiday weekend according to the Nation Weather Service. What's more, "swimmers and [well, for......

It's always a funny thing in California in that it's good when it rains despite the fact that everyone hates when it rains. Take this winter. We haven't had that much rain and there's been all this worry about their not being enough water for our reservoirs and Tahoe's economy and dear God, it's the beginning of the global warming end! But on the other hand, we don't think there's many of you who've been thinking to themselves "gosh darnit, I really miss a good rainstorm. Why can't it rain more?"...

The third sign of the apocalypse is upon us (the first being the TomKitten and the second being, um.... the closing down of all the local independent bookstores), as the weather reports grimly predict that water will fall from the sky over the weekend. What?? It's May! It's not supposed to rain in May! Actually, the National Weather Service says that the average Bay Area May gets 3 days and a half-inch of rain. That......

It snowed in the Bay Area this weekend -- the first March snowstorm since 1896. And we're not just talking snow like in the Sierras or maybe on the top of Mount Tam -- there was snow in Danville, on Mount Baker in the South Bay, and even some snow in San Francisco by West Portal. The last time it snowed in San Francisco was in 1976, and we got about an inch. (Click here for some interesting SF snow history: SF's largest snow was 3.7 inches in downtown on Feb. 5, 1887.) We didn't get a huge 1887-style blizzard on Sunday, but Highway 17 was closed for three hours on Sunday morning for snowplows, a section of 280 south of 92 was closed, a seven-car pileup on 80 was blamed on hail, and in the area's biggest car pileup in ages, 28 cars spun out of control in the snow on the north side of the Waldo Tunnel just outside Sausalito, as unsuspecting motorists sped out of the downhill-heading tunnel only to be faced with snowy, slippery roads. As an immigrant to San Francisco from a snowier clime, this correspondent assumes you kids out there will have no idea what we're talking about when we say that we're sorry this didn't happen during the week so you could have a snow day from school. Know why we know you won't know what we're talking about? The Chronicle had to provide a definition of snow for its bewildered readers!!! We love this city.

While snow falls in flakes and looks more like small ice shavings, hail is balls of ice, usually small. If the trees are white, [National Weather Service meteorologist Brooke] Bingaman said, it's probably snow.

For those that are about to burn, we weather you. Don't be fooled by the Gerlach weather reports, highs and lows are well above the reported mid 70s. Our advanced weatherists reported Sunday as "about 95 or so by day ... perfect playa weather. It was warm in the evenings, say 78 or so, stayed in the 68-72 range until 2am, then into the low 60s." Tuesday morning, however, saw pre-dawn temps in the......

Ah, it’s raining today and for those of us working, nothing quite sums up the first day back after the holidays like it being grey and miserable outside. It looks like it’s going to be grey and miserable for awhile as five-day forecasts call for rain, rain, and more rain. When it rains, there’s nothing quite like the high-comedy that comes with watching the local news broadcasts as they spend what always feels like......