If there's one thing San Franciscans love, it's San Francisco. If there are two things, it's San Francisco and anything artisanal and expensive. And so it is right at the highly profitable intersection of the two that we find the new Fog Point vodka from Alameda-based Hangar One. Made with captured San Francisco fog (more on that later), this $125-a-bottle limited edition adult beverage "is a true expression of California, distilled" (at least according to the company's website).

"Fog is a big part of the identity of San Francisco," an ad that sounds like it's announcing a cure for cancer helpfully informs us. "With Hangar One, water is at the center of everything we do. Vodka is made up from 60 percent water."

Just how, exactly, does the company capture the fog? "To create Fog Point, we installed our very own fog catchers to turn fog into fresh water," explains Hangar One, which is now a separate entity and business from the company that first made Hangar One vodka, St. George Spirits. "This water is then blended with vodka distilled from premium wine sourced from a sustainable vineyard on the Central Coast."

And just what is a fog catcher? "A fog catcher consists of a precision-engineered mesh canvas that is stretched out on a frame, then erected high in the air at a location rich in pure fog," the for-sale page explains. "As fog drifts through the mesh, millions of beads of moisture are caught in its fibers."

“We say it’s made of California because truly, you’re tasting the Bay,” head distiller Caley Shoemaker explained to Time. “You’re tasting the soil and the grapes and all of that comes together really well in this interesting little project we’ve done here.”

And while this "fog to bottle" product gets a pass because the company is donating all the profits to water conservation efforts, that's the only reason it gets a pass.

Now, if the fog they were capturing in service of booze included KarlTheFog's awful recycled jokes, we might feel differently.

Related: Waffle-Flavored Vodka Ruins National National Waffle Day

Today, August 24, is National Waffle Day. Sounds like fun, right? Who doesn't like a waffle? Not us. Not you. Certainly not the dog. But National Waffle Day was utterly ruined this year after Georgi vodka brand introduced waffle-flavored vodka onto an unsuspecting world. Ground zero can be pinpointed to a party at a Holiday Inn in Stony Brook, NY.

"Holiday Inn Express of Stony Brook is celebrating National Waffle Day by serving alcohol flavored waffles complimentary to all guests and patrons," reports Sacramento Bee. "Star Industries of Long Island, owners of Georgi, will be introducing the first ever waffle-flavored vodka."

What does it taste like, exactly? According to Martin Silver, President of Star Industries, the company that owns Georgi vodka, "it tastes just like waffles." So, yeah.

Waffle-flavored vodka follows on the heels of such liquid monstrosities as Smirnoff Fluffed Marshmallow and Smirnoff Whipped Cream. What used to be a chic, crisp libation treat is now an amiable appeltini. The degradation of vodka must end, and it starts with you. Anyway, try to have a happy National Waffle Day as best you can.

Also, former San Francisco mayor Willie Brown will be in attendance. Far more importantly, however, is the face that Gold Dust Lounge, now beeping on life support, will offer patrons $1 vodka drinks tomorrow, Friday, from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. Catherine Hill will also sing a song she wrote about the historic/possibly doomed Union Square bar.

We are going to be honored by the presence of Wille Brown this Friday. Catherine Hill wrote a song with the lyric, “call Willie Brown, tell him i’m a part of this town…” and you can go one better by sharing your feelings about the bar with him in person this Friday. Cat’s going to sing her song with the amazing house band, Johnny Z and the Camaros while the bar serves Vitamin V vodka for $1 between 6pm and 8pm.

See you there. All of you.

Gold Dust Lounge photo: The Inadvertent Gardener

Just in time for San Francisco Gay Pride, Absolut Vodka has introduced a "limited" SF edition. Following on the heels of New Orleans, Loas Angeles, Boston, and (oddly enough) Brooklyn flavors, San Francisco is the fifth city to receive the company's boozy bottle honor. But does it taste good? Normally, flavored vodka taste like corn syrup-tinged diarrhea. (Some might say the same about plain vodka, but those types are usually pretentious mixologists. You need to ignore those people.) In an effort to review the allegedly hella-SF booze, we demanded a PR representative to deliver a free bottle of Absolut SF to our front door posthaste for immediate tasting.

Well, not really. But close. And since we couldn't personally judge the stuff for review, because it was sent pro bono, we asked two dear friends / target audience subjects, a male homosexual and a super-cool bartender who prays at the bourbon altar, for their opinions.

After sipping Absolut SF over ice, our gay pal said, "Hmm, not bad. But you know me. I'll drink anything." Our bartender friend, after sniffing and then taking a conservative pull form the bottle, revealed, "Hmm, not as bad as I thought it would be. Even kinda OK, I guess. I don't know."

You hear that? "Even kinda OK."

As for your SFist editor? Sure, we liked it. As with most people, we enjoy clear things that make us woozy. It's flavored with grape, dragon fruit and papaya, which, according to Alcademics, "were selected to represent the city by paying tribute to the Wine Country, and Asian and Latin cultures."

It runs around $20 a bottle.

Oh my God, you guys, no way. Get this: the New York Post was wrong. What's next: Intelligent Design? Celebrity weddings? Our meth-induced epiphanies that the CIA, in cahoots with the Norteños, are reading our emails and listening in on our phone calls? See, it seems that "[n]o slingshots have been found" and that the NY Post was wrong. And we refuse to believe anything Rupert Murdoch-related is less than perfect.

Thankfully, according to Dan Noyes, San Francisco Police Department. Sgt. Steve Manina did confirm that "the brothers had a vodka bottle in their car that night." (Grey Goose? Smirnoff? Mixed with Mountain Dew? These details are most critical, people.) Because there ain't no party, like a vodka-drinking, tiger-taunting SF Zoo party, right? Right.

The Dhaliwal brothers, they seem like a couple of nasty little rapscallions. Ruffians, we'll go so far as to say. Why? Because after last week's Christmastime big-cat attack - a mauling that took the life of their "friend," Carlos Sousa Jr. - it seems that at the two brothers "had slingshots on them at the time" - well, at least according to "sources" at the New York Post. (Seriously, aside from aspiring serial killers, who does this? Who goes to a zoo to aggressively taunt the animals? This behavior goes well above and beyond the reliable boys-will-be-boys excuse.)

In addition to the mini catapult, an "empty vodka bottle was also found in a car used by Amritpal Dhaliwal" the Post goes on to say. (What, no Ranch Dressing?)

But have no fear, the Dhaliwals landed themselves Mark Geragos, the same media slut attorney who defended Michael Jackson, Winona Ryder, Gary Condit, and the dreamy Scott Peterson. Regarding the rumored taunting, Geragos hyperbolically told the Chronicle that "'as far as [he was] concerned, that's an urban legend ... there was no taunting of the tiger.'"

And with that, we're off. Come on, a media circus involving actual animals? This is going to get interesting.