Somebody give these kids an award. It truly is just as offensive and assaultive as real dubstep. more ›

The only difference between this video and a Saturday night in SoMa is a) it features someone underage, and b) furries don't tend to prefer flower costumes. more ›

A very tenacious little monkey plays with, and pokes, a very patient feline in this viral vid that's been making the rounds. The cat actually seems to not mind being prodded and pushed around for a bit, but then he just starts sounding pissed. more ›

Did you know that STDs were on the rise among elderly people in Florida? Yeah, it's kind of been a thing. The Daily Show even covered it. Rates of STDs are up 70% down there in the last five years! And today we bring you this adorable public-service announcement that should help you remember that old people are people too, and yes, they have sex. We apologize if any of these people is your grandmother. [WOW] more ›

Today on Anderson Cooper's talk show he brought on Animal Planet's John Fulton and animal columnist Mary Ellen to show off Nimbus — a very pretty, wide-eyed Persian cat whom Mary Ellen has taught to swim. Did you know that 1 in 1,000 cats dies by drowning? Neither did we, and this is why poor Nimbus was forced to learn how to paddle across a swimming pool and climb out on his own accord. more ›

Here's an extra-brief, cute-overloaded palate cleanser for you featuring one tiny kitten and twelve seconds of unabashed adorableness. [via BuzzFeed] more ›

This makes the early '90s feel like a really, truly, long-ass time ago. Not only was Camel brazenly trying to sell nightclub owners on hosting moronic parties with Joe the Camel there, but Technotronic was huge. [via Everything Is Terrible] more ›

Working from home as we do, we totally relate to the "not wearing pants for three days" thing. That is totes normal, btw. [via UCB Comedy] more ›

Yep. It's the end of days, folks. And in a bid for internet celebrity, this young fellow let his friends light his hair on fire, multiple times, while feeding him flaming Doritos. more ›

Davy Jones of the Monkees died today. He was 66, and cause was a heart attack. Behold Davy in his prime, in this weird scene from the 1968 Monkees vehicle Head, featuring him shadowboxing, washing his hands without soap, and finding a huge eyeball in the medicine cabinet. Man, '60s movies were effed. more ›

Behold this montage of a number of beautiful works by the late Bob Ross, as well as a collection of things he said on air, totally out of context, that actually sound quite sexual. "Just touch it... give it a little pull." Oh, yeaaah. [Dangerous Minds] more ›

Aw. In honor of Valentine's Day, watch this sweet little love letter to automatic weapons. Even the ladies like 'em! [Everything Is Terrible] more ›

This new "Day in the Life of San Francisco" can serve as a kind of counterpoint to this 1955 city travelogue we showed you. It's the work of the city tourism bureau, and yes, it's hard to make this town look bad in any light, but this is a particularly blue-skied example. Doesn't much look like this today! more ›

You've probably thought you could see dogs smile before. Well, this one literally can! Like you can see his little lips rise! And he can go crosseyed on command and and and... he can look suddenly alarmed. On command. It's insane. Also, it's a British dog, so it figures. Watch it now. [via WOW] more ›

We really, really thought this meme would die a quick death, like, before the new year. Then it didn't. Then we got sick of it. Then you had clever kids in New York and L.A. chime in with their favorite clichés. And we were almost satisfied to to let this 'Shit Baristas Say' thing suffice for the S.F. voice (it was shot at Four Barrel). But now, because we're all stoned, preoccupied, and (stereotypically) unambitious, San Francisco chimes in several weeks late with this very appropriate and bandwagon-y entry. ‎"Now that you're 40, you should start thinking about a career." Oh, San Francisco. We love you. Now just shut up and watch. more ›

Meet Adam (left) and his pal Allan (right). They're Marines. Allan seems to know that his friend is a screamer. They are aboard the Giant Slingshot in Orlando, and yes, when there is no countdown warning him of the takeoff, Adam screams and screams. Also, he says he'd rather be back in Afghanistan than on this ride. We believe him. [via WOW] more ›

We only just today discovered that the talent of being able to sneeze with one's eyes open is actually a minor YouTube phenom. Yes. Please appreciate this soft-spoken young lady who appears to morph into the devil's spawn as she performs her trick. Below, a couple more examples. more ›

The great Etta James has died, ladies and gentlemen, at the age of 73. She was a tough, loud, dirty old broad who brought some much needed sex into the sounds of the early 60s with songs like "Something's Got a Hold on Me," "I Just Want to Make Love to You," and "I'd Rather Go Blind." Her signature song, "At Last," has become a wedding standard. And now she has passed on. more ›

This video is just too surreal and intense (and long) and the music to electro and washed out to serve as a proper afternoon palate cleanser, so we bring it to you now, as you unwind from your day. The song is called "Pleasure Palaces" (album preview here), and it's by Scottish band Errors. more ›

It's like The View, circa 1977! Listen to Annette Funicello, Margot Kidder, Loni Anderson, and Phyliss Diller talk frankly about their first sex experiences with Dinah Shore on Dinah!. more ›

Maybe you've seen this already, but we hadn't, and it's dern catchy! The song is by Livia Scott and you can find it on iTunes here. more ›

As you know, LCD Soundsystem exists no more. This made many people, both hipster and not, quite sad. The band, led by James Murphy, went out with a huge bang at a final concert at Madison Square Garden last April, an event that New York magazine called "a marvel of pure craft." The show is already the stuff of modern legend, and a new documentary by Dylan Southern and Will Lovelace hopes to solidify that legend. It's called Shut Up and Play the Hits. more ›

Please enjoy this little afternoon dance break courtesy of The Breakfast Club Dancers... more ›

We live in an age when a news story can become the stuff of legend — and fodder for balladeers — within days. And yes, the story of the wily burglar of Telegraph Hill, who we thought had for sure screwed himself by getting stuck on a cliff and subsequently surrounded by cops, but who managed to slip away into the night just as soon as police packed up their stuff and gave up their stakeout, has already become a ballad by local musicians Taylor Brown and Brian Bergeron. And it's pretty catchy! more ›

Behold, this newly rediscovered bit of film, a Cinemascope look at San Francisco in 1955 by filmmaker and inventor Tullio Pellegrini. It's part of the Prelinger Archives, and it contains some characteristically dry, 50s-style narration. We begin with views of the city as you approached it by car from the south, east, and north. One surprise, at least to us, the population at the time, 775,000, wasn't much lower than it is now—a lot of people fled in the 60s and 70s. more ›

We know. There are at least ten of you out there who are SO OVER this you could die and you've just lost some modicum of respect for us. But chances are we've lost your respect hundreds of times in the last year, so what's one more time? It's a new year! Besides, there's something about this 'Shit ____s Say' meme that lends itself particularly well to Bay Area clichés, and since it's just not quite dead yet (despite our earlier prediction), we bring you these latest updates. more ›

The brilliant Jennifer Saunders (Ab Fab) and Dawn French (French and Saunders) have done us a little "reading from literature," in this case the translated transcript of an interview done by a Hungarian newspaper in 1995 with Madonna, while she was there filming Evita. The interview was conducted in Hungarian, with the questions translated for Madonna, and then Madonna's responses were translated into Hungarian. Sometime thereafter, USA Today requested a copy of the interview, with Madonna's responses translated back into English. French and Saunders read this amazingness, for your amusement. [Dangerous Minds via WOW] more ›

Time, man. You think you get it. And then you realize that the Ancient Greeks and Romans were so calendar-challenged that they had to insert random months every few years to make sure the seasons lined up properly. Then you have the Gregorian calendar, and the day in 1752 when England the U.S. decided to adopt it, effectively losing 11 days all at once. It's kind of insane. (You may have also heard that Samoa just decided to switch time zones, and Samoans didn't get a Friday. Like today didn't exist for them, at all.) more ›

In case you needed any further evidence that cats are adorable yet cold-hearted bitches, watch this. more ›

Wow. That was fast. No sooner was Epic Beard Man a modest viral sensation, after beating the crap out of a young African American man aboard an AC Transit bus last year, but some budding screenwriter apparently thought his story needed to immediately turned into a movie. The movie's called Bad Ass, and as Uptown Almanac shows us it stars Danny Trejo as a Vietnam vet who goes around what looks like L.A. kicking peoples' asses. Now, many of the details here are oddly familiar, including the fanny pack and what looks like a t-shirt that says "I Am a Motherf**ker," but we're guessing that poor, homeless Tom Bruso isn't going to see a dime from this straight-to-DVD clunker. more ›