It only took three years to get, but the Associated Press has finally gotten hold of reports from the government agency responsible for overseeing our nation's zoos - and they confirm what we pretty much already knew: Investigators agree that Tatiana, the Siberian tigress who killed Carlos Sousa Jr. and attacked his friends on Christmas 2007, must have been taunted by the three inebriated teens. As big cat expert Laurie Gage, from the USDA's Animal and Plant Health Inspect Service wrote in a draft of her report: "With my knowledge of tiger behavior I cannot imagine a tiger trying to jump out of its enclosure unless it was provoked." more ›

The Examiner reported on Thursday night that they obtained a never-before-released police interview with the Brothers Kulbir and Amritpal “Paul” Dhaliwal regarding the 2007 Siberian tiger attack at the San Francisco Zoo, which resulted in the death of 17-year-old Carlos Sousa Jr.. This exclusive report, released just in time for the third anniversary of the incident, promised a "tasty treat" in its headline, which turned out to be the fact that the three victims were eating nachos at some point before Tatiana the tiger escaped her enclosure and attacked them. more ›

Are Kulbir Dhaliwal, 25, and Amritpal "Paul" Dhaliwal, 21, the two brothers involved in the 2007 tiger mauling for which they recently received a $900K settlement, crying out for attention, are they just plain old stupid, or both? Just a couple of weeks ago, Kulbir Dhaliwal was arrested for alleged possession of 3 grams of cocaine on July 22, while riding in the car of Tarlok Dhaliwal, 26, who has since been confirmed as the third infamous brother and who was initially pulled over in the July incident for driving the wrong way on a one-way street near the San Jose campus and was arrested for suspicion of being under the influence. more ›

Kulbir Dhaliwal, one of the brothers who survived the tiger attack at the SF Zoo back in Christmas of 2007, for which they both were recently awarded a $900,000 settlement, is already back to his thuggish ways. Dhaliwal, who was a passenger in a car that was pulled over in Santa Clara County on Wednesday, was arrested on suspicion of possessing either 3 ounces or 3 grams of cocaine and suspicion of being under the influence. (The Chronicle and San Jose Mercury have conflicting reports. There's a big difference between ounces and grams... Update: the Chronicle has updated their story with grams.) Dhaliwal had to be held down in order for the police to obtain a blood sample, and police records show that he also had to be restrained during his September 2007 arrest. The driver of the vehicle, Tarlok Dhaliwal, was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence. It's unclear what his relation is to the infamous duo. more ›

The victims (instigators?) of the Christmastime tiger mauling that left their (sort of) friend, Carlos Sousa Jr., dead, Kulbir and Amritpal Dhaliwal will receive a cool $900.000 from the San Francisco Zoo. According to SF Chronicle, this settlement by the zoo "resolves claims the brothers brought in U.S. District Court against the city, zoo and Sam Singer, a crisis public relations consultant the zoo hired after the attack." The brothers' lawsuit, among other claims, says that the SF Zoo failed at "keeping the 243-pound Siberian tiger named Tatiana in an enclosure that had walls 4 feet lower that what is recommended by the Association of Zoos and Aquariums." It also says that Kulbir Dhaliwal "wasn't attacked until after an employee refused to allow him into the safety of a zoo cafe." Which, yeah, regardless of what you think of the hoodlum brothers, that's kind of cold. Anyway, the Dhaliwal brothers will split the money, which is sure to buy all of the Grey Goose, Drakkar Noir, and criminal defense attorneys they will ever need. more ›

Triggering Tatiana flashbacks today, we just got word that a white tiger fatally mauled a zoo keeper in a New Zealand yesterday, "just three months after the victim had saved another keeper from an attack by the same tiger." Happening at the Zion Wildlife Center in Whangarei, somewhere in Middle Earth, tiger handler Dalu Mncube succumbed to severe tearing of the abdomen. According to Times Online, "the male tiger attacked Mr Mncube with no warning, ripping at the helpless man's body as his colleague tried to fight him off with a stick and a fire extinguisher." San Francisco Zoo, if you recall, payed host to a fatal tiger attack on Christmas Day 2007 when Tatiana the tiger leaped from her grotto, attacking and killing Carlos Sousa Jr. Unlike Tatiana, however, who was shot and killed by SFPD officers, the white tiger wasn't put down. Update: We were wrong. The white tiger, one of only 120 white tigers in the world, was killed soon after the mauling. more ›

This just in. Carlos Sousa, Jr.'s family, who sued SF Zoo over their son's 2007 Christmas Day tiger mauling death, has agreed to a settlement. According to today's release: more ›

Because Valentine's Day is about necking, red roses, and Whitman's Samplers -- and not about making that special someone your creampie cutie for the night, you perverts -- the San Francisco Zoo's annual adult-only "Zoo Sex Tour" has changed its name to “Woo at the Zoo.” Why? No idea. But the zoo tells us: more ›

Due to the "unusual and extraordinary" Christmas Day tiger attack at the San Francisco Zoo -- which resulted in the mauling death of 17-year-old Carlos Sousa Jr. and wounding of Paul and Kulbir Dhaliwal -- a three-member tiger team formed by the Association of Zoos and Aquariums has been called in to examine the zoo's big cat grotto. While the investigation and renovations are underway, the tigers and lions are currently kicking it indoors. What's more, according to zoo director Manuel Mollinedo, the cats have been subjected to the wonderful world of Disney: more ›

According to police reports Paul Dhaliwal admitted to "standing atop a railing of the big cat enclosure and yelling and waving at the animal that would later maul them," killing Carlos Sousa Jr. on Christmas Day at the SF Zoo. more ›

In the battle to see who's going down and who gets what and how much in court, new "evidence" suggests that possibly, maybe, perhaps Tatiana the tiger was provoked. It seems that said proof is in the form of a footprint and blood found inside the tiger enclosure at the SF Zoo. According to the kids down at KCBS: more ›

At the bargain price of just $35 dollars down at City Hall this morning, authorities released the emergency 911 tapes of the San Francisco Zoo tiger attacks. The attacks, if you don't remember, occurred on Christmas Day, taking the life of Carlos Sousa Jr. and injuring the now (in)famous Dhaliwal brothers. The footage is raw, with the most unnerving robotic British female voice overlapping the frantic phone call, but to check listen to the audio, go here. According to the Gate: more ›

Well, not "all," per se, but on Monday night Paul Dahliwal, one of the three people involved in the Christmastime tiger attack at the SF Zoo, telephoned Carlos Sousa Jr.'s mother, Marilza, to tell her that he and his chums were "dancing, talking, and laughing" moments before the attack. (Doing the Turkey Lurkey dance, no doubt.) It seems that Paul also told her that they were not taunting the tiger, something that has been widely speculated. more ›

Tiger attack victim, 17-year-old Carlos Sousa Jr., was mourned last night at the Five Wounds Portuguese National Church in San Jose by hundreds of loved ones. more ›

Today Gavin Newsom announced that "a series of public hearings on the fatal Christmas Day tiger attack" that resulted in the killing of 17-year-old Carlos Sousa Jr. will start as soon as this Friday. After these hearings, the Recreation and Parks Department Commission will "make a set of recommendations to improve the agreement that allows a nonprofit to run the public zoo." Or something like that. Although it's an attempt to appease the mayor who would like "'to know how this incident happened and what measures are needed to prevent this type of incident from occurring ever again,'" it sure sounds like a lot of busywork for the sake of busywork. Anyway, according to the Gate, Marisa Lagos deftly explains how the zoo is run,similar to a broken home. more ›

Oh my God, you guys, no way. Get this: the New York Post was wrong. What's next: Intelligent Design? Celebrity weddings? Our meth-induced epiphanies that the CIA, in cahoots with the Norteños, are reading our emails and listening in on our phone calls? See, it seems that "[n]o slingshots have been found" and that the NY Post was wrong. And we refuse to believe anything Rupert Murdoch-related is less than perfect. more ›

Damn. Ing. more ›

The Dhaliwal brothers, they seem like a couple of nasty little rapscallions. Ruffians, we'll go so far as to say. Why? Because after last week's Christmastime big-cat attack - a mauling that took the life of their "friend," Carlos Sousa Jr. - it seems that at the two brothers "had slingshots on them at the time" - well, at least according to "sources" at the New York Post. (Seriously, aside from aspiring serial killers, who does this? Who goes to a zoo to aggressively taunt the animals? This behavior goes well above and beyond the reliable boys-will-be-boys excuse.) more ›

Uh oh. more ›

(Ah, the year of the tiger. OK, month of the tiger. But still.) more ›

Not only was Tatiana a gorgeous, majestic, and endangered creature. It seems that she had a special talent for sniffing out liars, too. more ›

Second verse, same as the first: more ›

New information about the SF Zoo tiger attack has been released by police chief Heather Fong. Based on information gathered from the two survivors, brothers Paul Dhaliwal and Kulbir Dhaliwal, Carlos Sousa Jr. actually saved one of them from being killed. Apparently, when Tatiana originally went after one of the brothers, Sousa courageously tried to draw her attention away from his friend, which worked (obvi). more ›

Update: The murdered teen has been identified as Carlos Sousa, Jr. more ›

(Why, yes, we do plan on running this into the ground. Thank you for asking.) more ›

Dr. John Brown of San Francisco General Hospital told Good Morning America today that the two survivors in yesterday's tiger attack (which killed one) are "doing well at the present time. They have both gone through their surgeries well. They're both in stable condition." more ›

In this video, zoologist Dave Salmoni demonstrates how to survive a tiger attack. Of course, it does appear that Dave and these tigers are lovers. The demonstration of a "hostile situation" involves a kinky threesome complete with zerberts. The main point in all of this is, don't run. more ›