While SFist cringed at the fatal dose of crime littering the Bay Area, it found solace in Hillary Clinton's San Francisco campaign headquarters opening, which featured loads of exposed mammary glands. In other news, SF Taxi Commission ruled that Satan's cab must keep its (in)famous medallion number, 666; and in an un-fashion-forward frenzy, San Francisco Fashion Week (chortle) bars bloggers from covering and getting smashed at their shows and parties, respectively. Also, they found a......

By a 5-1 vote, the San Francisco Taxi Commission said that poor Michael Byrne will have to keep taxi cab medallion #666. The meeting sounded like a hoot too as the head of the cab drivers union testified while wearing red horns. While speaking to the commission, he said: "How dare you take Lucifer's number away. This is a serious issue.'' We also love that in the minutes of the meeting, a footnote had to be added to let everyone know that the truth of the Book of Revelations "cannot be verified." O rly? Byrne did not attend. ...

Now that going green is the AIDS ribbon of the aughts, it only seemed like matter of time before a green taxicab company would be unleashed before the unsuspecting masses. And it is-- ladies and gentlemen, may we introduce to you, the one and only Billy Shears. No wait, Green Cab. ...

-It looks like it's a bad time to try and fly east. -Taxi Commission hires a private dick. ...

We finally have a new head of the Taxi Commission, that being the old head, Heidi Machen. We certainly hope she enjoyed her month-long vacation. Unlike her previous reign, however, Gavin gave her some homies to have her back and finally replaced three outgoing commissioners whose terms had already expired. Gavin should have done this earlier, but it got in the way of his appearing on morning radio shows. ...