(A little late, because we're fixing our servers around here today.) Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 70. Number of people pictured whom we recognize: 8 (including Charlotte Maillard Shultz, Stephan Jenkins, and a certain precious Bumblebee!) Minority count: 7 (10%). Getty v. Traina: 1-3, with Gettys represented by Swells stalwart Gavin Newsom. Bumblebee sightings: 2! Ms. Jennifer Siebel attended a benefit party/auction for Tipping Point, and will also be......

Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 100. (It's all pictures and captions this week, with no dishy Catherine Bigelow text, we're sorry to report.) Total number of people pictured whom we recognize: 14 (including Vanessa Carlton and Stephan Jenkins, Joan Chen, and a Chron reporter we see from time to time when we go out for drinks with Eve). Minority count: 24 (24%). Hats, capes, tiaras: 2, 0 (but 5......

Yay, Civic Center Mike's back from Palm Springs! And what should he stumble upon while wheeling his suitcases out of the BART station but Bill Clinton's Yes on 87 Rally! (87 is the tax the oil companies for alternative energy proposition. Yes arguments here, No arguments here.) You have to check out Mike's post from the scene, it's hilarious. Here's some of our favorite Mike-style zingers (we're leaving a bunch of them for you......

Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 74. Number of people pictured whose names we recognize: 12. (representative sample: Jonny Moseley, the omnipresent George and Charlotte Shultz, Gavin and child model Brittanie Mountz, Stephan Jenkins of Third Eye Blind.) Minority count: 1 (1.38888%.) Getty v. Traina: 5-30. This week's event is a party at the DeYoung museum thrown by Dede Wilsey in honor of her son Trevor Traina's recent marriage! (30......

Panic in the streets of San Francisco! Further adding to housing hysteria, the Chron prominently fronts an article reporting that the housing market is going to crash some time next year. Set your watches now, folks! Factors cited include an overreliance on zero-down interest-only mortgages, rising interest rates, and the sputtering U.S. economy in general. Plus, geez, how much higher can the market go, anyways? Picking a listing totally randomly, $939,000 for an 875 square foot house on 20th and Bryant?? (We apologize if this is your real estate investment, gentle readers.) Even the optimists are starting to sound a little nervous: an economist for the California Association of Realtors, who you know's gotta be the most up of anyone out there on the real estate market, concedes, "There may be some people who may get into trouble, but we don't think it will dominate the market." Gosh, we hope Third Eye Blind's Stephan Jenkins can move that Pacific Heights mansion of his before the inevitable market crash! ...

Sure, there are new releases this week by Britney, Eminem and Shania, but what love have they ever shown to San Francisco? "Talkin' in the Mission / Over coffee, this is my utopia," sings Vanessa Carlton on "Harmonium," her second full length album. That might sound like a normal morning to us, but we'll allow the young songstress her love affair with our fair city. Partly recorded here and produced by resident rocker Stephan Jenkins,......