Let's not think about that mauling incident or the possibility that one or both of the Dhaliwal brothers pissed into the tiger grotto, prompting the Christmas Day attacks. No, instead let's think about the bundle of joy born at the Zoo this past weekend: a little giraffe, right. Sure, it was yesterday's news, but the adorable image was just released, and the story wouldn't have been complete without it. All together now: aw. Also,......

So, it's the eleventh hour and you've decided against crushing up a couple of Ambiens into a mug of fume blanc and calling it a year. Instead, you've turned that frown upside down, choosing to see what's happening tonight on New Year's Eve 2008. Good for you. And to help you out, here are some last-minute events for each neighborhood in the San Francisco. Just follow links for more info; they will provide you......

Well, this sounds like the perfect (and perfectly frightening) holiday entertainment for both kiddies and adults. On December 20, 21, and 22 the San Francisco Symphony will perform the entire Harold Arlen ("Harold, darling -- stand up!") and E.Y. "Yip" Harburg score to The Wizard of Oz right in the comfort and holiday splendor of Davies Symphony Hall. And although Rufus Wainwright will not be there to cover Garland's tunes while sporting a blue......

This past Thursday while we were en route from Denver to SFO, we were thoroughly enjoying the in-flight movie when screams suddenly broke out from the rear kitchen. Since we happened to be sitting in the very last row of the plane, we were especially caught off guard by the commotion and were forced to break focus from No Reservations (which was actually quite charming) to see what was going on. Not three feet from......

-- Goodbye Yellow Brick Road: A typical night at the cabaret this is not. The last time we saw Connie Champagne perform (during her stint at the Plush Room), tweakers were passing out in the audience, drunks wept into their vodka rocks, and Connie busted out a dead-on tribute as Judy Garland. Performing Garland's classics (like "San Francisco") as well as songs she might have crooned ("Bohemian Rhapsody" and "A Case of You"), Champagne......

The Examiner's on Bobagate! They've now found out Ed Jew, through his father, rents a building to a pot club, at 1545 Ocean. Hope those cannabis users have water. Look at all these properties the Jew family owns too! 13 in San Francisco, 1 in Burlingame, and 4 in Arizona. Arizona? Is he running for supervisor there too? In other property-related news, it turns out Tapioca Ed has also evicted an African immigrant couple's hot......

Can no force stand up to power of Critical Mass? Willie Brown was no match for the monster .. but Willie didn't have a WALKING HORDE OF UNDEAD. Preliminary reports from local Zomboligists predict some sort of catyclismic corpse animation coming this Friday, the 25th, around 6pm. And by terrible, horrible, incredibly accidental coincidence, that's exactly the same time that an army of revenge-seeking bicyclists will take the the city's streets. Epic battle is......

There was a time in our lives when we were convinced the Smashing Pumpkins were going to save rock n' roll. There was also a time in our lives when we were convinced Billy somehow plugged into our subconscious and in "Gish" captured the sound we dreamed of in the middle of the night. That was a long time ago. So we're not sure what to think of the announcement today that the Pumpkins 2.0 are going to play eight shows at the Fillmore from July 22 to August 1. ...

We couldn't help but notice this letter to the editor in Sunday's Sporting Green: ...

Oh, so Jennifer Siebel is that kind of girl: the kind that doesn't like other girls. People are abuzz about the comments that Gavin Newsom's current companion made in what was otherwise a kind of fluffy throwaway interview in the Sunday Style section of the Chronicle -- where she lashed out at people criticizing her man's behavior with the wife of his campaign aide by saying, "the woman is the culprit.." Oh, nice. Here's the......

Well, we're sorry to report that everyone's day jobs managed to succeed where Wade Crowfoot did not -- namely, in preventing anyone wearing a chicken suit from gaining access to the city's very first Question Time before the Board of Supes! What is democracy coming to? Doesn't mean the board didn't manage to thoroughly amuse itself, though -- to laughter, Board prez Aaron Peskin jocularly asked Sup. Sean Elsbernd if he'd like to stand in......

Hey, folks, your Trimethyldioxypurist is back with a quick follow-up to the review of Meth Coffee we posted yesterday. We're tempted to just link to this press release without comment. ...

As our little Nancy Pelosi is discovering it's good to be Speaker of the House. Your peeps get some shout outs, you get to name who chairs what (even if they don't know the difference between the two branches of Islam that are currently killing each other in Iraq), and you get to chill with rock stars, as Nancy is, having the pleasure of hanging with Bono for Bono's semi-annual visit to congress. ...

Before we begin, we'd like to extend our deepest sympathies to the family of James Kim. We are not, by any means, trying to discount that tragedy by juxtaposing posts about the Kims with more light-hearted posts. It's the nature of doing a compilation such as this one: we're trying to give a full slice of the goings-on in the Ist-a-Verse: the good, the bad, and the ugly....

It's gotta be hard to perform at the symphony in the winter -- a number of musical sneezes and coughs periodically punctuated Wednesday's San Francisco Symphony movie-themed performances, helmed by guest conductor David Zinman. Get well soon, Wednesday night ticketholders! It was a night of romantic movie themes and orchestral folk music (and one modern piece described in the program as "an aircraft revving for takeoff"), with violinist Hilary Hahn the main star. A poker-faced......

Again -- Rob Black/Matt Drake fans, if you guys send us your YouTube clips, we'll gladly post 'em -- for the District 6 election! This week's episode: Everybody Hates Heartwarming. We got forwarded this latest YouTube clip of Chris Daly on the campaign trail, by DiggaSlidwell. We'll let Mr./Ms. Slidwell tell it to you in his/her words: I got sick of all the crazy hate mail bad mouthing Chris Daly, so I took my camera......

We were psyched to see our fellow French man, Jean-Yves Thibaudet, at the symphony last night. He was amazing all right, but guest conductor Semyon Bychkov stole the show, by masterfully conducting an eclectic program at Davies Symphony last night (performance will repeat tonight through Sunday): a modern piece by a living composer, an as-romantic-as-it-gets piano concerto with a prodigious Thibaudet as the soloist and a Shostakovic symphony to celebrate the composer’s 100th anniversary. All......

Did you know there's fifteen people running for three seats on the school board this election cycle? That's almost like a District 5 election! How will you figure out who to vote for (besides just blindly voting the Bay Guardian ticket, that is)? Never fear -- SFist has bravely gone out and contacted all the candidates, and, much like we did for District 6, we've sent them all the same interview questions and will run......

Expect Google to take a lot of crap over the next few weeks as the company has basically just popped their proverbial political cherry. What they've done is they've gone and set up their very own PAC, a PAC which is taking the first step to courting-- wait for it-- Republicans. Yep, that's Google, siding up to the party of Mr. Evil himself, Karl Rove. To help them, they've hired as lobbyists two ex-Republican Senators, Dan Coats of Indiana and Connie Mack of Florida. And on Wednesday, Google will take part in their first political fundraiser, for Republican Congresswoman Heather Wilson. ...

Last week's winner: The East Bay Express. What? No letters about Cody's? Fret not -- there's an article. (We had no idea the reason why there's no books on the shelves there now is because they were behind on their bills!) Also -- neighbors rat out neighbors for loud parties and for opening day-care centers. Cover: Fat acceptance movement (medical, civil rights, artistic, online). Good article, which makes the no fatties cartoon running later in......

We were getting ready to write yet another post about the media using Craigslist as a scapegoat for the evil Internet while blatantly ignoring all the good it serves. So we began the arduous task of looking at newspaper articles till our eyes started to glaze over, each article looking eerily and eerily similar to the previous one... "Bad Stuff happens on Craigslist," Blah, Blah, Blah, "Fair Housing," Blah Blah Blah ..."Flesh Bazaar," Blah......

We're back from vacation -- and it's hard to get caught up on two weeks of news! Why didn't anyone tell us San Jose mayor Ron Gonzales got indicted? Over a garbage-services contract, no less. Mr. Gonzales, really -- if you're going to collaborate with the teamsters, can't you pick a less obvious type of city contract to collaborate over? We're also impressed that the latest article gratuitously mentions that Gonzales is in an ugly divorce after allegations of an extramarital affair arose. How did it become that the SJ mayor is now more lurid than SF's? Back in SF, Everybody Hates Chris District 6 candidate Rob Black finally launched his website. It reveals that in his youth, he used to organize reggae concerts. Get up, stand up. Don't give up the fight! On a similar note, M&R reluctantly reveal that there was probably no impropriety in Chris Daly's former roommate getting a job as a housing inspector, despite their valiant efforts to find some. And finally, the SF Party Party is thrilled to announce that someone (besides exotic male dancer Starchild) is going to run against Bevan Dufty for the District 8 seat. We here at the 'Fist have been asked to start up a District 8 election watch column too (if only to have an excuse to interview Starchild), but we're not doing it until someone suggests a fun name for the column. Go to it in the comments, folks! If we get a name we like, we'll totally launch it up. ...

If you ever wished to stand up and stretch, or God forbid, leave, in the middle of attending an opera, the SF Opera is there for you. They don't provide you with concerts you want to run away from, but with a bunch of casual opportunities to appreciate the lyrical arts al fresco. They have a concert in Stern Grove (July 30th), they have the annual Opera in the Park in Sharon Meadows in......

LAist has so much fun this week! They go to E3, where they overhear the timeless remark "Man, this is where nerdy girls get laid." Is that a promise? They also give us this week's best CDs and make us realize that LA is the best place to use Zillow. Ah, Houstonist. They're biking to work, that is, if they can figure out how to get there. That's right, Mapquest says "Houston had the......

Congratulations to Cement Brunette for winning our Second Gavin Caption Contest, with the entry: San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom and girlfriend Sofia Milos seen rehearsing their "I've Had The Time of My Life" Dirty Dancing number for the upcoming California Democratic Convention variety show.. Ha! In other news, we saw some more movies for the SFIFF, including the controversial The Bridge, about suicides off the Golden Gate Bridge. We also saw the Yeah Yeah Yeahs,......

One of our favorite things about baseball is the 7th Inning Stretch. There's something about a stadium full of people standing up and singing a completely quaint, nearly 100 year-old-song in our jaded, post-post punk, post-post modern, post-post-ironic age that gives us the warm fuzzies. But at last Sunday's Giants game, the Giants continued on with a new tradition that is slowly and quickly ruining the 7th Inning Stretch-- the playing of "God Bless America" right before "Take Me Out to the Ballgame." And yes, we do hate America, why do you ask? ...

The best roommate we ever had had a surefire (ha) way to summon a malingering Muni -- all he'd do was light a fresh cigarette and, like magic, the tardiest of busses would appear. Since then, our former roommate has quit smoking, and now Muni has, too, as yesterday the Board of Supervisors approved legislation banning smoking at all public transit stops in the City. Introduced by Fiona Ma (who knew she was still......

Torontoist throws down the gauntlet and challenges all comers: pillow fight, bitch. They also stand up for a fellow blogger taking heat from the TTC and welcome city-wide WiFi. SFist can finally admit it: It's possible that Bary Bonds juiced. Is Bay Area artist (tempted to put quotes around that) Thomas Kinkaid "kinda crappy" or "explosively crappy" or does he just like marking territory? SFist wonders. Technology comes in the form of new Mac goodness......

">After Wired ran a story documenting the GoogleCenter of the United States, a bunch of ists jumped on the opportunity to figure out their own middle. Gothamist, Chicagoist, Bostonist and Seattlest all zoomed in on their creamy GoogleCenters. A crack cartography team is hard at work determining the GoogleCenter of the Ist-a-verse as you read this... Austinist read a book about Olympian Bode Miller and liked it. They also took a few pictures of......

Some people are sooo thin skinned. Like our Governor. A bunch of tree hugging Austrian hippies got all huffy because Arnie executed some dude and now the Governator is all pissed. On Monday, he faxed the Mayor of Graz (what? He couldn't get the Mayor's e-mail address?) and asked that his name be taken off a stadium that was named in his honor. He also asked that his name no longer be used in the promotion of Graz and returned his "Ring of Honor" that the city bestowed on him in 1999. About the ring, Arnie said in his fax: now that "official Graz appears to no longer accept me as one of their own, this ring has lost its meaning and value to me. It is already in the mail.” Oh, snap! ...