Tiger attack victims "yelled" at Tatiana. [SFGate] SF Main Library re-opened its first floor. We had no idea that is was closed. Still, yay! [CCBlog]Evacuating together. Aw. (Wasn't this an SNL commercial parody ages ago? With Phil Hartman and Victoria Jackson? Also: we're old.) [The Snitch]Staph infection hysteria is the new AIDS hysteria. So retro. [SFBG]Last night's gruesome N Judah Municide. [N Judah Chronicles]You know who's down with Barack Obama? Your mother. [Examiner]Duffy's (formerly known......

Wasn't "wardrobe-malfunction" a runner-up for Word (Phrase?) of the Year a few years back? (We have neither the energy nor patience to look for it. We're in the midst of a Walgreens discount holiday candy comedown, and it's painful. Seriously.) Anyway, at the risk of sounding like SNL's "Weekend Update" circa 2005, we present to you a couple of mannequins who look like they were either interrupted in the middle of a sexual assault,......

-- hey willpower at Glitterbox: At this "funk punk thrash electro discotheque" (what, no show tunes? Bah), local pop/R&B/dance band performs. DJs Javier Natureboy and Junkyard spin funk, punk, and electro well into the morning hours. At least until 3 a.m., anyway. Starts at 9 p.m. at Cat Club, 1190 Folsom (at Eighth Street). -- Darrell Hammond: SNL comic comes to SF. He goes on at 8 p.m. and 10:15 p.m. at Cobb's Comedy......

-- Dreamgirls: Jennifer Hudson's performance as Effie White won her an Academy Award, and her end of Act I nervous breakdown ("And I Am Telling You") blew audiences to the back wall of the theatre. . She is the reason to see this movie. It also features Anika Noni Rose, a former A.C.T. student. Check out this musical loosely based on the rise of the Supremes tonight at 7 p.m. at the Castro Theatre,......

We somehow missed this, or more like didn't care, but Charles Barkley has now become Public Enemy #1 here in the Bay Area. This is because during the NBA Playoffs, Barkley has said a number of bad, bad things about the area. Among other things, he's said this about the Bay Area: "It's the dumping ground of people who can't afford to live in L.A." And this: "You know, we should take the show on the road. For the next game, we should go to hell - I mean, go to Golden State." And then there's this: "I would rather stay on Alcatraz than San Francisco or Oakland.'' He also talked trash about Sausalito . Sausalito! ...

We think Harry Shearer has one smart publicist. His book tour for Not Enough Indians hits Jewish Community Centers across the country. That likely guarantees attendance and eager book buyers. We caught Shearer's conversation with Jack Boulware Wednesday night at the Osher Marin Jewish Community Center. Boulware had interviewed Shearer years ago when working for the now defunct Nose magazine. The two had an easy rapport, and it was clear Boulware had done his research.......

This week Newsweek hops on the "San Francisco Values" bandwagon with a story on Pelosi and what they refer to as San Francisco's "Loony Left." The story makes it seem like we're Nancy's redheaded stepchild. Oh wait, we're probably going to get a comment about saying something bad against redheads and stepchildren so we'll say crazy aunt instead. Oh now we'll get comments about discriminating against aunts and crazy people and, well, forget we even mentioned it. ...

Somebody put the "SNL" Pelosi skit back up on YouTube. Since the skit is pretty funny and was taken down earlier, we're going to put it back up. Why? Because the Man can't hold us down. And because "SNL's" regular site is so crappy they deserve people to constantly break the legal rules on this stuff....

If you've been as disappointed with "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" as we have, then you might be approaching the similarly-themed sitcom "30 Rock," which premieres tonight at 8 p.m. on NBC, with a bit of trepidation. If a so-called "master" like Aaron Sorkin can't write a compelling show about the backstage antics of a late night comedy program, how could a mere "SNL" alum like Tina Fey do any better? Well, we're......

After a long day following a long week, we stumbled home to our apartment around midnight Saturday night looking forward to nothing but a long, restful sleep and an early morning rise to go to the gym. We didn't get it. Turns out our courtyard neighbors decided to throw a party that night. In the courtyard. So what we got that night instead was loud noises til 3 in the morning, not very restful sleep, and a late start to the gym followed by much napping-- an entire day's worth of plans shot down by the blasting of ? and the Mysterians "96 Tears" at 1:30 at night. We were not amused. ...

Seeing the UCB: A.S.S.S.S.C.A.T. show was, to once again put it in musical terms, like seeing some super group playing a small, intimate theater in an effort to get back to their roots. Why? Because the cast of this show included "SNL" cast members Amy Poehler, Rachel Dratch and Horatio Saenz, as well as Will Arnett (Gob from "Arrested Development"!!!! ) and not-as-famous Matt Besser (grandson of an original Three Stooge, Joe) doing improv for over an hour. All this in the tiny and intimate Eureka Theater. The show was frickin' great. ...

Thursday night was night number two of the San Francisco Fringe Festival. The Exit Café, Fringe headquarters, wasn't very busy, but they had the beer and free pretzels ready (you can eat and drink in the Exit's theatres). Lily, the Exit's nonchalant dog, was on dropped-taquitos patrol. First up on our Fringe itinerary was Show Me Where it Hurts by Karen Ripley and Annie Larson with the Gallimaufrey Orchestra (Dan Wortman, JX Jones and......