Ladies, please sit down for this one. Hell, you guys should sit too. See, San Diego resident Alfred G. Rava sued the Oakland A's. Why? Well, on Mother's Day of 2004, the Oakland A's had a Mother's Day event. Said day celebrating certain vagina owners went like this: Before the game there was "a fight-breast-cancer 5K run before the game, free mammograms, and the first 7,500 women through the gate got floppy plaid sun hats from Macy's." Pretty cool, huh? Well, Rava, a San Diego attorney who happened to be in Oakland and at the ballpark that day, was so incensed at not receiving his own free floppy hat that he sued. What's more, a judge just gave "preliminary approval to a $510,000 settlement -- roughly half to lawyers and the rest to the victims."

We at the Gothamist network would like to express our heartfelt wishes to the people of Minnesota in the days after their tragic bridge collapse. We're not trying to discount the severity of the accident by making note of it in opposition to our usual -Ist lightheartedness - we just wanted to take a moment and recognize those affected last week.