Let's take a look back at a week that raised this Zen koan: if Kevin Federline got into a wrestling ring with a wrestler, who would you root for?...

South by Southwest! We never get to go. But if you're heading out to Austin, you're cordially invited to our sister -ists' after-party next Wednesday at the Red Bull House from midnight to 6 a.m., after Ghostland Observatory closes the Austinist+Gothamist+Alarm Magazine Day Party over at Red 7. (More info on the before-party is forthcoming from Austinist.) Austin and Gotham have a sweet lineup set: performances by Grand National, The Cloud Room, Forward Russia, and Gogol Bordello, along with Austin-locals Car Stereo and Learning Secrets. Plus, they're giving out gift bags (don't forget to report those to the IRS), and there's a super secret surprise. We can't tell you who it is -- our lips are sealed. So go and find out! Best part? It's free if you RSVP. But RSVP sooner rather than later; they're closing the list once they hit capacity. (We were warned that the list might already be closed for today, but they should be reopening it later, so keep hitting refresh.) ...

We really do feel pretty bad for the poor Berkeley high schooler who tried to throw a little house party while her parents were away and ended up with around 100 people at her place and a guy from another school stabbed to death over a skateboard. Her mistake? Putting up a post about the party on MySpace. (We heard that last bit on KRON 4 news but can't find it confirmed in print anywhere.) The Examiner starts running an online Police Blotter for the South Bay. So good. Items include: a man who called the cops to "arbitrate" a dispute at the South City Papa Joe's because he forgot his wallet and couldn't pay for his meal; a Redwood City woman cutting her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend with a car key, and the robbery of two bottles of Red Bull from a convenience store on Willow Road (the obligatory joke about it giving you wings was made as well.) And a car chase went bad last night, as a person fleeing the cops in a stolen VW Beetle lost control and spun into a Honda as he ran through a red light at Fifth and Brannan. The Honda plowed into the Golden Gate Tennis Club, and the Beetle ran into a fire hydrant, sending water pouring into the air. The cops caught the Beetle driver trying to hide in the tennis club. ...

If you're anything like us, watching those Victoria's Secret models strut their stuff last night was not nearly enough T&A to get you through the week. Which is why we're thankful that the world of modeling will once again take over our TV screens tonight with the premiere of a new season of "Project Runway" and the end of this season of America's Next Top Model." When our favorite contender, Kim, was eliminated from......

Who says stoners aren't productive and ambitious? At one point yesterday there were three posts in a row about the medical marihoonie: A jailed dispensary owner writes from a Fresno jail where three fellow advocates are also locked up, Charles "Eddy" Lepp stands trial this morning and faces four life sentences for growing cannibis and Mountain View looks to be the first town in Santa Clara county with a dispensary ordinance on the books.......

Gav really just cannot make up his mind! After first saying he'd think about moving the Jonny Moseley birthday party ski jump to an eager and enthusiastic Potrero Hill, he's now all like, oh, it's gotta be on Fillmore after all. "I can't imagine a more idyllic location to showcase San Francisco." Aw, come on, Gav! We know you used to rep District 2 so you've got a soft spot, but the neighborhood at the other end of the 22 line is even hillier, has just as pretty views of a bridge (okay, it's the blue one and not the red one, but still) and the city skyline, has better parking, and -- actually seems enthusiastic about hosting! Compare this to the griping 94115ers, all like, "will this block our sewer drain" and "I have been planning my wedding ever since I was a little girl and when I light my unity candle I don't want people to be shouting out 'whooooooo!' outside." (FYI: if you're thinking about crashing Ms. Beijan's wedding to her pollster fiance this Saturday, she's getting bouncers.) Plus, the bars in Potrero are so much better than the bars in Cow Hollow for Jonny Moseley's 30th birthday party celebrations. Mike at Potrero Hill SF is starting a letter-writing campaign to Gavvy-Gav to get him to reconsider -- sign on! Picture from the Red Bull street luge competition in Potrero....