(By D. Hanousek) As my three-year-old son lays passed out on the couch after throwing up three times this morning, I realize that I have a confession to make. I don't care if my kid gets your kid sick. more ›

Two Department of Public Health employees tasked with making sure restaurant employees know how to properly handle your food have been accused of soliciting bribes in exchange for faking documents that ensure every restaurant has a certified Food Safety Manager on staff. A city investigation in to the fake certifications discovered hundreds of falsely certified restaurant managers. more ›

According to Occupy SF ilk, the Department of Public Health distributed a letter telling them to remove their tents along Market Street. They must move immediately. more ›

Vomit. McDonald's legendary McRib wad—i.e., a sandwich consisting of a pork-like substance pressed into a ribcage shape, bathed in corn syrup and heated to palatability—makes a grand return to heart valves next month. more ›

Before he died, Apple co-founder Steve Jobs wanted to world to know that he deeply regretted "wasting time" on alternative medicine while trying to combat his pancreatic cancer. During a recent interview with 60 Minutes, Jobs' biographer Walter Isaacson said: more ›

On Saturday in the city's Castro arrondissement, a smattering of residents attended a nude-in in response to Supervisor Scott Wiener's cover-up legislation. And, let's be frank, the protest, while titillating, made little to no sense. Wiener isn't anti-nudity; he's anti-poop. He doesn't want to see or, worse, smell your skidmarks on a public chair or bench. And neither should you. Do you like poop? You shouldn't. It's disgusting. Yes, it is. And at the very least, don't you expect your civic leaders to shun shit? To eschew poo? The answer is yes. Yes, you do. Otherwise, you're a major poop lover. And that's icky, you doo-doo lover. more ›

Sorry, Jenny McCarthy, but San Francisco likes their students vaccinated. On Thursday, an estimated 2,000 city students "who still lacked proof of a whooping cough vaccination one month into the school year" were banned from classroom until they got the shot. According to the Chronicle, a new law asks that all kids in grades seven through 12 in both public and private schools be vaccinated this year, "but districts struggling to get families to comply asked for and received a 30-day extension." more ›

During today's Board of Supervisors meeting, District 8 Supervisor Scot Wiener will unsheathe new legislation about public nudity in San Francisco. Wiener represents the Castro, which has seen an uptick in nakedness as of late. Sanitary issues surrounding clothing optional ilk have made some residents worry that they're leaving more than just a jarring impression. If you catch our drift. more ›

The nascent taste bud's loss is now the juvenile waistline's gain. So to speak. See, the noted fast food chain announced today that the McDonald's Happy Meal will receive a healthy makeover. Accused of aiding childhood obesity, the new Happy Meals will boast apple slices, reduced portion of french fries (boo!) and a wider selection of small drinks, including... more ›

And in some The-More-You-Know news: next Thursday, July 28th is World Hepatitis Day. And with that, the San Francisco Task Force on Hepatitis will organize its first educational outreach campaign, sponsored by [pharmaceutical company name redacted]. Volunteers from Bay Area organizations including the Oasis Clinic and San Francisco needle exchange volunteers will hand out hepatitis C fact sheets at BART and Muni stations throughout the city (Castro, 16th/Mission, Montgomery and Embarcadero). more ›

A bit saddened and surprised that Phil Bronstein failed to contact us immediately to get few choice quotes and some penetrative views on the human penis, we can forgive the Chronicle's Editor-at-Large since he penned a downright spectacular piece on the male piece. Specifically, the flap of skin that gets lopped off for religious and/or societal reasons is also great for freshening up a disgustingly-aged face. (By the way, hailing for Southern California, we have 0.00 problems with plastic surgery. Having work done is the Orange County version of getting a tattoo. A time-honored ritual, really.) Bronstein writes: more ›

Over the past year, the San Francisco Health Department has tirelessly worked to shutdown the scourge known as hookah lounges. For those not in the know, hookah lounges are a rite of passage for anyone new to the Bay Area. At these cesspools of moral bankruptcy, one can partake in smoking innocuous, flavored tobacco (which violates the indoor smoking ban) while ordering a side of dolmas or hummus and pita triangles. They're as bad as Hitler. more ›

Just what we've always expected, driving in a 2011 BMW X5 is safer and healthier than riding your bike along city streets. According to the Chronicle, "A new study published in the journal Environmental Health Perspectives showed a link between biking in heavy traffic and heart health risks, with cyclists having heart irregularities in the hours after their exposure to a variety of air pollutants on busy roads." Kind of like how being behind the trigger it safer for you than being in front of the barrel. Got it. more ›

Before it turned into lazy comedians' anti-gay punchline at bad comedy clubs across the country, HIV/AIDS continues to kill scores of people all over the world. But it doesn't have to be that way. In fact, many people now live healthy and long lives thanks in part to the wonders of pricey medicine by greedy drug manufactures. That said, today is National HIV Testing Day. So, come on, get tested already! It doesn't hurt -- the swabs are nothing but gentle glides! -- and it's a super smart and respectful thing to do if you and your partner haven't done so already. more ›

Given the control PR ilk try to exert over food writing in the Bay Area, we're shocked (and a bit tickled) to see this story go live. See, several people fell ill at last month's SF OysterFest at Fort Mason after apparently consuming a bacteria-laced food item that kept them on the toilet for hours. City Insider reports: "The Department of Public Health was on the case -- and has determined the culprit was 'campylobacter' which means 'twisted bacteria.' Sounds yummy, huh? It causes major food poisoning and symptoms last for up to a week." more ›

A morning Muni nightmare occurred Thursday when a passenger lost his breakfast (or Wednesday night's dinner, we don't know what kind of morning meal habits you people have) on an outbound K-T train. more ›

Looking to swipe your stash, the Drug Enforcement Administration’s (DEA’s) second National Prescription Drug Take-Back Day is this Saturday. In an effort to "prevent pill abuse and theft,"government, community, public health and law enforcement partners at these sites will be working together to collect expired, unused, and unwanted prescription drugs that are potentially dangerous if left in the family's medicine cabinet," says the DEA. Furthermore, tossing your pills down the toilet can lead to environmental hazard. more ›

The BAR (where one can now - at last! - comment on articles) says that HIV infections in San Francisco are now in "retreat." Over the last decade, the rate of new HIV cases has dwindled. Significantly so! Check it out: more ›

Diarrhea, vomiting — just your typical school field trip, right? CBS is reporting a sickening wave of flu-like illness amongst 50 Bay Area students and adults on a five-day educational trip at Walker Creek Ranch in Marin. more ›

Due to the probable closure of the Lyon-Martin Health Clinic, there will be an emergency community meeting tonight. An email being sent around reads: "As you may have heard, Lyon-Martin Health Clinic is closing at the end of the business day on Thursday. Tonight we are pulling together a community meeting at 7pm at the LGBT Center, 1800 Market Street, room 301. The intent of the meeting is to formulate a community response./demands and develop an action plan. At 6:30pm, a few of us are planning ... come up with a tentative agenda for the meeting." more ›

While local online news sites burn pounds of ink on an increasingly tepid KUSF story, a real closure that could cause real tragedy might flare up this week, and no one in the media seems to care. Lyon-Martin Health Services (1748 Market Street), which has operated for over thirty years and was founded by legendary local lesbian activists Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, is rumored to be shuttering this week due to financial troubles. Queer blogger Michael Petrelis heard the news that Thursday could be the clinic's last day, and he puts this troubling news "in the larger context of gay inc here in SF," where the LGBT-serving New Leaf mental health agency closed last year, and where the LGBT Center was rumored to be having budget issues -- though those rumors turned out to be somewhat quashed, after they got a loan from the City to help renegotiate their mortgage. more ›

Today, Dec. 1, is World AIDS Day, a time set aside to collectively "take action to tackle HIV prejudice and to protect yourself and others from HIV transmission." more ›

Although approved by the Board of Supervisors in March, a law banning smoking on restaurant patios went into effect this week. "Restaurants must not post signs advising customers they can only smoke at the curb or in a spot that is at least 15 feet from exits, entrances, windows and vents," reports KTVU/AP. "Failure to comply could cost restaurants a $500 fine." This is terrible news great news because now we can all be a little bit healthier. Delightful. more ›

First, Target came under fire for making an ill-advised contribution to an anti-gay politician. Now, according to SF Appeal, the retailer has been getting rid of hazardous waste in the Bay Area. SF Appeal reports that "a civil lawsuit was filed alleging that 240 Target Stores in California have been illegally disposing of hazardous consumer products that were returned or damaged in order to avoid expensive disposal fees." more ›

If Oz taught us anything, it's that prisoners will have sex. That said, in an effort to curb sexually transmitted diseases, the San Francisco County Jail's San Bruno clink installed 16 condom machines for about 750 prisoners. more ›

Bay City News reports that an evacuation at Pier 96 in Bayview/Hunters Point happened a little after 6:30 a.m. this morning after "[a] box was going down a conveyor belt in the facility when it broke open and a white powder was released into the air." more ›

After 35 years of providing mental health, substance abuse, and senior services to the LGBT community, HIV/AIDS patients and beyond, New Leaf announced it will close its doors by the middle of October. Why? Because it ran out of money. Everything from high operational costs, reportedly poor management, and a tenacious economic crisis are to blame. more ›

With temperature the Bay Area expected to reach the mid 90s to around 100 near, an excessive heat advisory has been issued. This affects the very young and very old, so head for cooler climates, babies and elderly. [CBS 5] more ›

Oh dear. Folks from the Cellular Telephone Industry Association, a wireless "nonprofit" group established in 1984, is in the process of suing San Francisco over our (alarmist?) Cell Phone Right-To-Know ordinance, according to SF Weekly. CTIA claims, among other things, "the city is not allowed to make decisions involving the wireless industry." more ›

More aesthetically pleasing, housing a better team, and situated in a superior neighbor -- AT&T Park can now say it's better than Dodgers stadium when it comes to food sanitary conditions. According to a food vendor health inspection survey on ESPN, a scant 4% of AT&T Park vendors were in violation, compared to the Dodgers Stadium 13%. more ›