Pope Benedict XVI took to his popemobile after meeting with President Bush at the White House this morning. The pontiff, who is celebrating his 81st birthday today, rode west beginning around noon on Pennsylvania Ave. through Washington Circle before heading north on Rock Creek Parkway before exiting at Massachusetts Ave. to arrive at the Vatican embassy. A large, enthusiastic crowd of about 10,000 gathered to cheer on the Pope as he rode by, rather swiftly......

Lust, greed, and murder, it seems, are a thing of the past, according to the Vatican. Drug use and life-saving genetic experimentation are what's hot, at least according to the updated thou-shall-not list, which Pope Benedict XVI has modernized for today's lifestyle. The Associated Press tells us that among this season's newest sins, environmental sustainability, or lack thereof, made the list. On the environment, both Pope Benedict XVI and the late Pope John Paul......

They came in peace, they asked to be taken to our leader -- and it looks like our leader is online casino GoldenPalace.com. Remember that awesome picture of the duck with the alien inside? SOLD! to the collectors of awesome Internet marginalia for $9600 on EBay, all to benefit the International Bird Rescue Research Center. GoldenPalace.com's last Bay Area purchase was Jerry Garcia's toilet (subsequently stolen before delivery). Other recent GoldenPalace happenings include their purchase......

As the only 'ist named after a Catholic Saint, we're going to report that yes, folks, there's a new pope in town! White smoke hath issued forth from the conclave of Cardinals, meaning that after just two days of deliberation, a pope has been elected. SFist is sad that the new pope isn't named Francisco and isn't from Assisi (or, for that matter, from here in San Francisco) -- he's Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger and......