Tiger attack victims "yelled" at Tatiana. [SFGate] SF Main Library re-opened its first floor. We had no idea that is was closed. Still, yay! [CCBlog]Evacuating together. Aw. (Wasn't this an SNL commercial parody ages ago? With Phil Hartman and Victoria Jackson? Also: we're old.) [The Snitch]Staph infection hysteria is the new AIDS hysteria. So retro. [SFBG]Last night's gruesome N Judah Municide. [N Judah Chronicles]You know who's down with Barack Obama? Your mother. [Examiner]Duffy's (formerly known......

One of our favorite episodes of "the Simpsons" is the monorail episode, the one where some con artist (voiced by the late, great Phil Hartman) convinces Springfield that the one thing they need to do to put themselves on the map is a monorail. Of course, it all goes to pot when the guy takes off with some of the money and Homer somehow manages to become the monorail's conductor. So what does this have to do with the 49ers? Because at a meeting yesterday with the Santa Clara City Council, a consultant hired by the 49ers painted such a rosy picture of what would happen if Santa Clara builds them a stadium, we can't but help think about the episode. ...

With the Yoga Journal conference going on at the same time as SF Sketchfest, SFist didn't know which way to turn. So, we spent the weekend in child's pose. Then, still feeling childish, we took our big sister to the Sketchfest tribute to Paul Reubens Monday night at the Palace of Fine Arts....

The FCC took a break from fining people for cursing and investigated local news programs who aired video news releases instead of, you know, actual news. Two of the stations that were caught doing it were KGO and KPIX. Whoops. KRON did it too but for some reason isn't mentioned, but then again, nobody watches KRON anyways...