Kids do the darndest things—like stabbing beautiful creatures to death, and forging notes from their parents. The fine folks at Bernal Cutlery came across this note "tucked away in an old Atlas Co knife display case from Oakland, CA." It's downright adorable, terrifying.

Rare is the Marina man (we're going to assume these were penned by a dude) who can bare his soul. But this guy did. And how. We're not sure who he is, exactly, but we do hope his heart mends fast (and that he refrains from calling women "sluts," which, among other things, is just vile and in poor form).

In good time, bro. In good time.

Thanks to Rick Haelig for the use of photos.

We came across this large poster-board note atop a car at Congo and Mangels in Glen Park. It seems that the driver of this vehicle has had quite enough of getting their side view mirror ripped off by careless drivers using the narrow street, so they left this very large, very curt note. But wait, there's more....

They also penned a message on the reverse side demanding damages for said car mirror, attorney's fees, and — why not? — jail time for the hit-run suspect. Behold:

We were walking along Duboce Avenue this afternoon and came upon this charmingly indiscernible and weathered hand-written sign. At the time we assumed it said something along the lines of "curb your dog." (Cue image of a dog strategically lifting its leg over the plants.) After several minutes of examination, we finally cracked the code. (Next stop, CIA, for us!)

Please do not throw garbage in our planter. Thank you.

It certainly is a nice planter, and it seems as though the note has done its job. Although, we imagine litterers don't tend to obey signs, especially ones that require a working knowledge of phonics.

Photographer (and cherished SFist commenter) Katy German snapped these shots of the Palo Alto Apple store's window today. Fans left a slew of notes, Pixar-based characters, flowers, a comparison to him as our generation's Ernest Hemingway (a dubious claim), and more for Steve Jobs, who died on Wednesday at the age of 56.

And on that note, we'd like to point your eyeballs in one last Jobsian direction, this wonderful piece by Brian Lam, former Gizmodo editor, and on his interactions with Steve over the lost iPhone 4. Amazing insights into the man, a well done article.

PREVIOUSLY: Chronicling Steve Jobs' Rainbow
Steve Jobs Backlash Begins
Video: Steve Jobs iPhone Vigil at Dolores Park
Chinese Android Store Mocks Steve Jobs' Death
Apple Fans Hold Vigil at Stockton Street Apple Store
Steve Jobs Is Dead

The owner of Borderlands Cafe and Borderland Books in the Mission is apparently not pleased about San Francisco's smoking laws. Here's what he has to say in the above sign:

Our Nanny State Would Like to Remind Us: Smoking Only 1) at the curb, or 2) if no curb, At least 15 ft. from exits, entrances, operable windows, & vents.

You should also eat all your vegetables, chew with your mouth closed, brush your teeth, and stop slouching already. Did you write a thank-you note to Aunt Edna for those nice socks? Good. Now finish your homework and get to bed at a reasonable time.

We would like to add that, while slowly poisoning yourself it's a good idea to remain 15 ft (4.572 m) away from open buckets of gasoline or similar fuels. It would also be best to avoid mummies, the Scarecrow of Oz, Frankenstein's Monster, and other flammable film icons.

Of course the above admonitions apply to tobacco as well as anything else you might be smoking nudge, nudge, wink, wink. The lighting of incense is also heavily discouraged. We cannot legally forbid the application of way too much perfume/cologne but... you know how there are always people making gagging noises around you, like in elevators and in line at the bank and theater? It ain't a coincidence.

Ok then! SFist personally used to love our opposite commute to Berkeley on BART in the morning when the handful of us left behind on a previously crowded car at Montgomery Station would all simultaneously start sneezing, thanks to the collective cloud of perfume and cologne that was left behind.

[photo via Ernie Hsiung]

Yesterday's gem of a note from Marcello's Pizza reminded us of this sign we spotted a couple of months ago at Green Apple Books, which reads:

LANCES, SHIELDS, HELMETS, ETC ARE NOT SOLD HERE.

Green Apple deals in books and music. Sadly, jousting equipment is not made available to the general public through us, as our target market has little interest in taking up the sport. Literature on jousting or music emulating the popular sound during the golden age of the joust may be found here though.

Thank for you consideration.

--GA Staff

Interesting that Green Apple had enough inquiries on the subject to warrant such a note. Or is it merely a clever way to sell more material on jousting?

Remember to send us more quirky notes via Flickr (tag them sfist!) or send them to editor [at] sfist [dot] com.

Submit your found Bay Area items to found @ sfist.com or tag them as sfist on Flickr. Tell us where and when you found the item, and any other helpful/interesting info.

This gem was found by SFist reader Robert last Friday in the Mission on Julian between 15th and 16th St. Says Robert, " How demanding a note this is, not even a please or thank you! sheesh." Well, that's better than this one neighbor we had a few years back, whom we overheard on the phone through our window well, yelling, "F*ck you, Mom!"