Results tagged “niners”

          

Here’s the thing: I’m a Bad Fan. I cuss and yell and get angry. For obvious reasons, my behavior becomes even worse when the 49ers are losing. (And, yes, the “obvious reasons” are alcohol, frustration and desperation; an amazing combination no man can resist.) But here’s the other thing: I know I’m a Bad Fan, so I at least attempt to minimize the annoyance that it must be to sit anywhere near me at a game.

Here's the thing: I might have a slight emotional problem when it comes to watching football. One need only read my angry tweets on Sundays to realize this. Example: "Person who should die: Peyton Manning." (Really, Daisy? Really?) "Person I find whiny and annoying," maybe. "Person who failed to throw a TD pass for the first time since November of 2008," great.

It was only a few short weeks ago that, in a moment of complete naivety and optimism, I declared (using ALL CAPS, nonetheless) the Niners were going to the playoffs. First of all, let me be clear that neither "naive" nor “optimistic” are words that have ever been used to describe me; I blame my bizarre moment of positivity and hope based solely on the power the 49ers have over me. See,they turn me into a passionate, emotion-filled, fiercely loyal version of myself. They make me believe, even when I know better. They make me forgive, even when I’m known for holding grudges. They make me bi-polar, even when… well, okay, fine…. There is a slight chance I actually should be on some kind of medication other than the self-prescribed white wine/vodka love affair I’ve got going on.

       

The Atlanta Falcons destroyed the 49ers yesterday in a sobering 45-10 ass-whooping. And yes, when I say “sobering,” I mean it literally because despite my fervent attempt to drink away the agony, no amount of $8.50 beer could numb the pain that was watching my team completely self-implode. And believe me, I tried.

Defensive end Kevin Fagan and his mighty mustache helped hold the line for George Seifert's boxer's-mentality 3-4 defensive scheme during the zenith of San Francisco's 1980s power.

This Sunday, the current San Francisco 49ers will be honoring the 49ers of the past by wearing mustaches in their final game of 2008 against Washington. We will honor this honor by honoring Great 49er Mustaches as this game draws nigh.

Roger Craig was one of the most versatile running backs the NFL has ever seen.

A perfect fit for Bill Walsh's short-passing offensive system, in 1985 Craig became the first man to gain 1,000 yards rushing and 1,000 receiving in the same season.

This Sunday, the current San Francisco 49ers will be honoring the 49ers of the past by wearing mustaches in their final game of 2008 against Washington. We will honor this honor by honoring Great 49er Mustaches as this game draws nigh.

When Joe Montana first came to the 49ers from Notre Dame in 1979, he brought this fanciful Fu Manchu style with him.

Of course, everything went up from there. Joe grew into the greatest quarterback the NFL has every seen, and the 49ers began their golden age of dominance throughout the 1980s.

Holy living crap, we love this so much!!

This coming Sunday, the 49ers are having a throwback uniform day in the final game of the season as Washington comes to Candlestick.

Word is that the o-linemen got it in their heads to pay tribute to Niners of the past by breaking out throwback mustaches to go with the throwback unis. The glorious idea spread, and now much of the team will be attempting mustaches for the Week 17 matchup as sign of strength of silly solidarity.

The Redskins ain't gonna stand a chance.

* San Francisco vs. St. Louis
Sunday, December 21, 2008. 10:00 AM, PST.
Week 16
The Interim Battle

Remember when battles between the 49ers and Rams would be cataclysmic offensive showdowns to determine ownership of the NFC West?

Yeah, those days are gone for now.

Found by American Football Spectacular's vigilant Kansas City correspondent Kyle Vorak, this mesmerizing image is from last night's TB@CAR ESPN coverage.

People of Charlotte, we say to you: do not be unkind to Steve Young.

As you can see, he is still elusive after years of retirement (and those adorable truck ads that your Mom appreciates).

* San Francisco vs. Arizona
Monday, November 10, 2008. 5:30 PM, PST.
Week 10
The Battle For Change

Can you believe that a week ago it was still in-question whether the United States Of America would either embrace change or sink with the failed policies of the GOP regime?

What a difference a week makes.

Also attempting turnaround is 49er Head Coach Samurai Mike Singletary.

OK, it has been reported by the NFL Network that the 49ers may offer a position to Secretary Of State Condoleezza Rice

One high-ranking 49ers official said last week, “If she’s interested in talking to us, I’m interested in talking to her.” Rice has told friends as recently as last week she would love to become president of an NFL team.

After dutifully soaking-in the coverage of Samurai Mike Singletary's promotion to head coach, the unfortunate conclusion becomes: it doesn't matter who San Francisco's head coach is.

The single biggest problem hobbling the 49er brand is that the ownership is inept in overseeing the processes of running a football franchise.

Well, that's that.

ESPN's Chris Mortensen just reported that Mike Nolan has been fired by the 49ers.

"Seems like the economic downturn has spread to the NFL," said AFS Bills correspondent DJ Burrito, as he thoughtfully swirled his wine.

Well, that sucked.

Now we've got all these rumors swirling that Head Coach Nolan II will be fired after this latest underwhelming showing.

American Football Spectacular's New York American Football Giants correspondent Joon Lee has some verrry specific opinions about Nolan and the state of the Niners...

As we enter Day 10 of the Lance Kiffin hostage situation.

So after all that, the Niners hired Mike Martz as offensive coordinator anyways. After just one interview and after not really talking to anybody else.

Here's todays sports news

Here's todays sports news

Here's todays sports news

Reporting from the snow-dappled streets of Chicago, it's your American Football Spectacular preview for this Saturday night's battle at The Stick as The Queen City's feline football franchise comes to town.

Let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start: when Alex Smith got injured, there was some back-and-forth about whether or not he was healthy. While this was going on, Nolan made the occasional subtle and not-so-subtle dig at Smith for not being sufficiently tough. Cue speculation and rumormongering approaching Brangelina levels. The Merc apparently had heard some other Niners joining in on the Smith dog pile and asked Alex about it. Alex went a wee bit on the ballistic side and accused Nolan of trying to turn the team against him, making him play when he wasn't healthy, and for generally being a big poopy-head. This all hit the press sometime yesterday and, well, hello hullabaloo. Naturally, the two parties met and issued statements talking about how their relationship is all :) and not :(

Here's todays sports news

Here's todays sports news

Joe Frazier was once quoted as sayin' "Kill the body and the head will die." For an NFL offensive unit, the opposite is the case. And here comes the context: it's your American Football Spectacular preview for lucky Week 13 of the 2007 NFL season.

Here's a roundup of today's sporting news

Reporting from spa-side in Santa Ana, it's your American Football Spectacular preview of the next rung of pain on the agony ladder that is the 49ers' '07 season.

-With tonight's 108-82 win against the running joke that is the New York Knicks (seriously, what does it take to get fired in that organization?), the Warriors have now won three in a row and are one game from totaling the amount of wins our local football teams have. The Beard led the way with 31 points, seven assists and six rebounds and Stephen Jackson got 23 points. For the Knicks, Starbury played his first game of the season showing that blackmail does work

We'd like to thank the Golden State Warriors for winning twice this weekend and thus ending the month and a half long losing streak by the local teams. And now, onto the carnage...

If there's anybody in the city taking more heat than Mike Nolan, it's his quarterback, Alex Smith. Smith stands accused by the Faithful of not very being good. The evidence? Overthrowing Receivers. Underthrowing Receivers. Not seeing open Receivers. The numbers back up the evidence-- he has a preposterously low QB rating (57.2) and completion percentage (48.7). He is also 11-19 as a starting QB. In the games we've watched, Smith looked like the same QB he was when he first started-- skittish and inaccurate-- so much so, the Faithful are muttering that Smith, as a #1 draft pick, has been a bust of Lucy Pinder-like proportions (sort of NSFW-y).