Last week's winner, the Guardian: Hey, we've received late-breaking word of some layoffs at the Bay Area's Oldest Alternative Newspaper. Hope you guys are all doing okay. Onto the pre-layoff news: It's the Freedom of Information issue! Hey, here's some free information -- the Guardian laid off some people. Slumlords, first in a three-part series. Cover: FOIA, FOIA, FOIA. Vanessa Hua gets some love for breaking the Kevin Shelley story. RIP, Octavia Butler. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs are so much better than No Doubt! New DVD magazine by McSweeney's. Bars and Clubs insert: how to open your own bar, and barronista gossip. And SFist Eve's horoscope: a gust of wind could destroy your potential this week, so proteck ya neck! (don't feel bad, SFist Eve, our horoscope says that our inner fears have paralyzed us. Why, we can hardly move our fingers to type this post!) Next, the East Bay Express: Bottom Feeder! A collection of funny Jerry Brown quotes, and an update on the social worker that let a teenager slash an old lady's throat in Berkeley. Ferries aren't really going to save us in an earthquake, are they? (no.) Cover: using citrus-based anti-bacterial lotions to stop AIDS (really!). Chinese buffets. Rob Harvilla warns about the dangers of Dem Franchise Boyz's song "Lean wit It, Rock with it": "If you lean wit it at the exact moment the person behind you chooses to rock wit it, you may collide and knock each other unconscious." That wins the prestigious "sentence of the alternative week" award! And trendy band alert: Arctic Monkeys. And hey, the SF Weekly's Nate Cavalieri shows up across the bay! Lean wit the SF Weekly, rock wit the Metro, after the jump. Also, the weekly of the week!...

We're a little jealous of District Five. How come they get cool supervisors that open up their offices to the public, put art on the walls, and dispense wine and snacks? We'd like to suggest to Sophie Maxwell that maybe an occassional open house could do wonders for her public image in District Ten. Either that, or maybe start a blog that allows comments. At least the light in her office was on past......

Ladies and gentlemen, the returning champ, the East Bay Express! Make your Best of the East Bay nominations now! People in Contra Costa don't appreciate public access TV. Can collectors aren't making as much money now that Oakland's giving everyone big recycling bins. Cover article: Baby boomers are making it unpleasant for other senior citizens in nursing homes. Addis Ethiopian in Oakland has new management that cooks better. Food cartoonist: Is Legendary Palace really legendary? And Savage Love: teenage boys looking for dates, meeting online buddies in real life, and someone bragging about sexual exploits. The SF Weekly: Cover article: Music special! Though, and we hate to quibble, but we think we've seen this cover art, with the tape-embossed lettering, on the Weekly a lot recently. Maybe mix it up a little? Harmon Leon reports on the white supremacist hate mail he's gotten post-Applebees, Nate Cavalieri follows a documentary film maker making movies for advertisers. So yeah! The music special! An article about Quannum Records and SFist's very own favorite hip-hop mogul! Yay SFist Isaac! Fun blurbs about musicians' day jobs, a very detailed article on how to get signed to a record label, SuperDiamond made almost $1 million last year, what it's like to work at GuitarWorld, and a whole lot of info on Bay Area music today. Our favorite ex-Examiner reporter in the Bay Guardian, no Metro this week, and the WRTW weekly pick of the litter, after the jump....

...to avoid the State of the Union address! The The Weekly. Editor John Mecklin says maybe the reason why the Guardian sued their parent corporation is because Brugmann makes bad business decisions (long litany of bad business decisions is then detailed). Gawkeresque levels of media-on-media violence! Cover article: Nate Cavalieri on Shawn Richard, a man who integrates gang members back into everyday society. SF Indiefest this week! Music reviewer misses Luna like a BFF. And Savage Love: sexual fantasies, not having sex with someone when you don't actually like them, and whether or not to have sex with someone asleep. The Guardian. Political pages: Nader needs cash, local news media sucks. Getting better deals on cable. The guy on the cover of the Guardian two weeks ago got his job back. Food: kohlrabi! Cover article: Neck Face (plus a Neck Face interview)! Sundance blew. SF Indiefest this week! Go to the Can't Stop Won't Stop release party next Tuesday! And Ashlee Simpson's awesome (writer claims that she sings at about same level as Conor Oberst). ...

This just slipped into our inbox from a mole at the Chron. It was forwarded to the all-staff mailing list by none other than Sharon Stone's former paramour and glurgy TV shill Phil Bronstein: -----Original Message----- From: [REDACTED] Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 8:15 AM To: Bronstein, Phil Subject: Chronicle SMOKERS I've written a few times before, but never have seen a response. I live in the neighborhood and walk to work in the financial......

Two dear friends of SFist wrote in to let us know about local tsunami relief events. Your Waitress wants photobloggers and everyone else to know that HiMY SYeD, Toronto native and current Bay Area resident, is asking folks to organize neighborhood vigils on Sunday the 9th and Monday the 10th as part of the Global Vigil for the Global Village. Vigils are already planned for Toronto, New York, Karachi, London and Vancouver, as well......