-- Clean up to take weeks. (But probably longer, we're betting.) [SFGate] -- Ship pilot called into questioning. [Examiner] -- Behold: your new Spock. [ONTD] -- Look what's now inside Precita Eyes. Something you cannot afford whatsoever.[Curbed SF] -- November film festivals on the map. [Gridskipper] -- Dumb teenager arrested in connection with shooting death inside the Metreon. [CBS5] -- Fog City Notes rides....the 38. Shudder. [FCN]......

Egads! The west span of the Bay Bridge was struck this morning by a container ship, the Cosco Busan. According to the Chronicle, "Coast Guard officials said the incident was not serious enough to merit a bridge closure." Still, that looks like some serious damage. A witness on the ship claims that the Cosco struck the second tower west of Yerba Buena Island, and says the the extent of the damage isn't known. If......

-- Cammerin Boyd killed by reasonable force, says jury. [Chron] -- Behold: the 54 million dollar SF home. Bow down before it, plebeians and renters! [CurbedSF] -- Argentina hosts the gay World Cup of soccer. Maricons can play sports? Well, that tears it. [Chron, via AP] -- Ed Jew fights to keep his seat on the board of supervisors. Sigh. [Examiner] -- Castro getting all atwitter over this year's Halloween. And we're all gonna die!!......

We don't even know where to start with this news item -- we had to read the article like three times before we figured it out. Who has a pro-war protest in San Francisco??? The conservative group Move America Forward showed up at the SF Federal Building to protest Nancy Pelosi's plan to leave Iraq -- with a bunch of chimpanzees they'd rented from a Kern County animal studio. The chimps were supposed to be......

You know how everyone says San Francisco is a little bubble utopia isolated from the realities of the rest of the world? Well, you might as well embrace it this Labor Day, because the eastbound Bay Bridge is closed all weekend. Yes yes, you probably already know, since Caltrans has commissioned every single flashing road sign in the entire state to remind you for the last two weeks. We feel badly for any Amber Alert......

So MUNI claims that your morning commute from the Sunset should be okay today, after yesterday's debacle in the Twin Peaks tunnel. Turns out there was indeed a derailment (of an L train, at 7:50 a.m.) in the tunnel, and the initial reports of an electrical problem were incorrect. Also, it turns out that this was the second derailment on MUNI in seven days. Where was the first derailment? According to MUNI spokesman Alan Siegel......

We here at SFist like our celebrities like we like our men: insane, rude, dirty, and fabulous. Oh, wait, that's NOT how we like our men anymore (that's 12 years of therapy finally paying off, folks.) But any celebrity who seems too classy, clean, or "just like us" is not who makes us buy that Us magazine at the Cala point of purchase. Our attitudes about celebrities mesh nicely with our attitude about our......