While the Bay Area struggles at keeping birds oil-free and alive, fisherman Hai Nguyen, 24, of Garden Grove tries to murder marine mammals. While fishing off the end of a Newport Beach pier, Nguyen used a steak knife to stab a sea lion who innocuously swiped his bait. According to AP, "the animal was taken to the Pacific Marine Mammal Center in Laguna Beach, where staff found the knife had pierced the sea lion's heart... [i]t was later euthanized." Nguyen faces up to one year in prison and a fine of $20,000for violating the Marine Mammal Protection Act. And for being a cruel dick. more ›

With every major pundit picking the Dems to take the House this fall (better pitching), a lot of attention is heading our way as the media starts trying Nancy Pelosi on for size. Of course, we think the whole Dems Take the House thing is just a set up for a Benitez-style choke job, but nobody asked us. So this week, Time Magazine has a big feature on our very own Congressperson. Wonkette already summed up the gist of the article, but they did miss the fun fact that she likes to watch MTV late at night when she can't sleep. That would explain the PelosiInDaHouze" who always posts on the Television Without Pity "Laguna Beach" boards. more ›

There's some actual baseball news a-happenin' here in the Fog City, our favorite kind too-- Barry news. First up is news that Barry is going to star in his own reality show. The show, which will air on ESPN, will have twenty-five Giants fans living in Bonds' gym and competing for his affections in order to win the next historic baseball that Barry hits for a home run. Actually the show will follow him throughout the season and will air once a week. Last year ESPN assigned a reporter, Pedro Gomez, to follow Bonds throughout the season only to have him mainly twiddle his thumbs as Barry sat out with his various knee injuries. Guess ESPN didn't learn their lesson. more ›

We've never really gotten hip to the all the bands the kids are into these days and for a long time we could never figure out why. Then, one day, it hit us: not enough guitar. Oh sure, Arcade Fire has a guitarist and the Killers have one and so do all of those generically named bands that are all featured on "Laguna Beach," but none of those bands ever used the guitar for what it was put on God's green earth to do-- to rock. What other purpose is there for a guitar other than to dispense bone crushing riffs, squealing guitar solos, and blissfully beautiful wah-wahed out guitar noise? If for no other reason, the reunion of Dinosaur Jr. is needed today just to show the young folks how it's done. For Dinosaur Jr. is the kind of band desperately needed in these "I Love the 80's" times, the kind of band that makes one giddy just over the fact they use stacks and stacks of Marshall amps. more ›