Public singing commenter and Ed Jew fan Walter's back! That's his 40 second partisan rendition of "These Boots Were Made For Walking." Click here for the Nancy Sinatra original, and here for the abysmal Jessica Simpson cover. Thanks to moderates-advocacy group CUIP SF for passing the clip along!......

The Sunday Styles section of the Chronicle does it again! Not content to rest on its laurels after watching poor Jennifer Bumblebee Siebel decimate herself, Styles next turns its gimlet eye on two other prominent members of the Swells set: Denise Hale and the inimitable bicycle-intimidator Dede Wilsey. Sunday Styles RULES. Turns out Pat Montandon, mother of Sean Wilsey and ex-wife of Dede's late husband Al Wilsey, has decided to pen a book of her......

Oooh, we hope Gavin starts jumping up and down on Bruce Pettit's City Desk Newshour couch next! Matier and Ross report that Gavin, a tireless warrior for nookie, eagerly accepted an invitation from his latest conquest, CSI Miami actress Sofia Milos, for a trip to LA. A stay at the Chateau Marmont -- where he could see Jessica Simpson, also canoodling while waiting for her divorce to become final; maybe some strolling down Melrose, and then a benefit dinner for the "Citizens' Commission for Human Rights." Sounds great, right? A little work, a lotta play! Whoot-whoot! Well. It turns out Sofia Milos is a very active Scientologist. And the innocuously-named Citizens Commission for Human Rights? A Scientology-funded organization that advocates against the use of psychiatric drugs. You remember, the group that went after post-partumly depressed Brooke Shields. Oh, we get it now! This'll be great for the mentally ill homeless population -- Care Not Lithium! (what is it with our town and the Scientology medical controversies, anyways?) Aides pointed this out to Newsom. (It's not like they hide it or anything -- their website says that Kurt Cobain died from psychiatric drug use. Funny, we always thought Kurt Cobain died from a gunshot wound to the head.) Newsom was like, whatevs, and went anyway. That guy is desperate for love! Unrelated, but amusing, picture of Globetrotter Gavin at last year's March Gladness tournament....

Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction was two years ago, but apparently America's still getting over it, if this year's batch of tame Superbowl commercials is any indication. We didn't think Superbowl ads could get any more boring than last year's batch. We were wrong. Sex was represented early in the form of Jessica Simpson singing about pizza bites--which have apparently been made for popping. Our hopes for the disappearance of the Simp from the pop......

A battle is brewing over the putting of Marines commended for heroism in the Iraqi War on billboards throughout the area. The billboards are part of the Marines' "Hometown Heroes" campaign which puts the pictures of local Marines up on the billboards with a mention of what award they have won and why. One of those who will be featured is Cpl. Michael Montemayor of San Jose who braved enemy gunfire and ran into a canal to rescue another injured Marine. This being the Bay Area, however, not all are psyched on the idea. Critics are calling the program a recruiting tool and "propaganda" because in honoring someone for heroism, they are making heroism seem, umm, heroic and thus might get people to join the military to be a hero. Not every anti-war group is against the billboards, however as some are pointing out that it's okay to call someone brave enough to jump into enemy fire a hero and still disagree with the war. ...

We could easily keep our eyes off the July issue of GQ. Sure, there was Jessica Simpson on the cover, but her titties and teeth and perkiness are all so fake, we are strangely unappetized by her. We only mention her so those who ogle on google will find us. On the other hand, at the bottom right of GQ’s cover, there was a more salivating little item, which Sarah, who lives the delicious life......

You probably remember that brief brouhaha about the CD price-fixing antitrust case, where that judge was going to give everyone who'd ever bought a CD from 1995 to 2002 $14.99 if they sent in their name and address, right? Well, as part and parcel of that settlement, all the CD companies agreed to send free CDs to public libraries across the land. Well, hey -- our beloved San Francisco public library just got its Columbia Record Club shipment, and received: 91 copies of Ricky Martin's Sound Loaded, 81 copies of Jessica Simpson's Irresistible, and 68 copies of Celine Dion's greatest hits. We're going to reserve ours online right now! Jaundiced athenaea-nauts are grumbling that the record companies appear to be dumping poorly-selling records on libraries (Irresistible, for instance, is the second Jessica Simpson album, the one that came out before Newlyweds), but cheerier librarians are storing, say, their 106 copies of Lenny to give away as prizes for summer reading contests. Check out what everyone else in California is getting. (For instance, San Francisco Unified (.pdf) is getting 51 copies of Whitney Houston's "Star Spangled Banner," 7 copies of "Carmen: A Hip Hop-era," 5 copies (clean) of The Wu Tang, and a smattering of Kronos Quartet and John Adams CDs, among many, many others)....

This week offers up many new releases that we know you've all been waiting for with great anticipation. Well friends, the wait is over. Exhale and read on. In the we're-so-sick-of-that-song, we're-shocked-the-album's-not-out-already category, we have Gwen Stefani's Love, Angel, Music, Baby and U2's How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb. Fantasia's Free Yourself is the debut album from this year's "American Idol" winner. You can pick it up with a copy of last year's "AI" winner......

We're just blamelessly living our idyllic lives out here: blue skies, a Democratic mayor, a modern art museum that doesn't cost $20 to get into, a panda bear coming to Oakland..... when suddenly, out of the blue -- this! A fresh cuppa New York hate because they're filming part of Rent out here! ...