They came in peace, they asked to be taken to our leader -- and it looks like our leader is online casino GoldenPalace.com. more ›

The truth is out there -- in Cordelia, outside Vallejo, at the International Bird Rescue Research Center. A technician x-raying a male mallard duck with a broken wing looked down at the x-ray and saw..... THE FACE OF AN ALIEN!!! AAAAAAAAAAGH!!! (We've helpfully circled the face for you on the picture). Can we just quote from this excellent press release?

The IBRRC staff discussed if an alien life form was either consumed by or trying to communicate with the people of Earth through the duck, because the center is located in an area of California known for its mysterious crop circles. Karen Benzel, Public Affairs Director for IBRRC noted that the symmetry of the alien's face is perfect, with an intense grimace, as if it was in anguish after being eaten.

News from the fauna! A male blue heron from Fairfield is recovering from a pellet gun wound to its wing at the International Bird Rescue Research Center. Because blue herons are protected under federal migratory bird laws, injuring a heron is a felony -- and because people love animals, there's a $5000 reward for information leading to an arrest. They're watching the bird closely because it seems very anxious to fly away (understandably). In happier local bird news, Stephen Colbert's adopted bald eagle was hatched (go to "Stephen Jr. Hatches") at the SF Zoo the day before the earthquake anniversary. Exciting! Also: it was cool when he ate the bird's placenta, to be just like Tom Cruise (go to "tip/wag Tom Cruise"). And in your last bit of local animal news, the City and County of San Francisco's been sued by a Sacramento pit bull advocacy group, over the new mandatory pit bull sterilization law. The Coalition of Human Advocates for K9s and Owners ("CHAKO"), through its attorney and founder Dawn Capp, alleges that the policy discriminates against disabled people, who should be permitted to breed pit bulls to use as guide dogs or service dogs. Check out Capp's blog for more information -- the most recent entry castigates the Denver location of the next Real World because of the city's anti-pit bull legislation. more ›