The above insert does not abide by power lesbian Suze Orman's commandant "People first, then money, then things." They're doomed. You see, in this morning's edition of the Chronicle, a nifty God-fearing inset came with your daily dose of quality Chronicle.reporting and humor. Since we fear the print pub and completely missed it, SFist reader Kate Horton sent word this morning by kindly scanning the above flyer. Behold: I thought I'd scan this and......

Photo: Whole Wheat Toast Well, this is unusual. (James 4:8)......

Have you read Living Oprah, the greatest thing in the world, ever? Penned by a 35-year-old writer, performer, and artist living in Chicago--who doesn't give her name--for one year she will be living her life according to Oprah's edicts. Because Oprah Winfrey, as we all know by now, is Christ reborn. Over the past few years--after becoming one of the most powerful person in the world, arguably--has achieved an inner peace and sparkling clarity......

Say it ain't so, Bernie! Wow. Former Catholic priest and SF radio talk show host has been "indicted on federal child pornography charges," according to the Chronicle. It seems that the popular KGO 810 AM host turned himself in to authorities earlier today. Although the "specifics of the allegations against him are under seal," said the authorities, we're dying to know exactly what happened. Because: whoa. Like, really. In addition to being a reporter......