We're a little late to this story, in part because we spent all day yesterday trying to separate out the hilarious comments from the offensive ones on SFGate.com (it looks like the homophobic ones have already been taken out as of today) -- but in a nutshell, last Friday, Lance Farber, the 47-year-old boyfriend of the city's new planning director John Rahaim trashed their temporary apartment, which the city put them up in and which......

On Sunday morning Gary Cloutier, 45, (the gay one!) spent several hours in jail after being arrested for public intoxication in Palm Spring, CA. But he didn't just have a few sips of an appletini. It seems that the mayor wannabe was "staggering and could barely stand," according to CBS 5, after cops found him in his car, freshly sloshed after leaving a Palm Springs bar. (And it's not even White Party season!)...

[sorry we're late today!] Close call! A truck driver careened off the San Mateo Bridge yesterday afternoon, but managed to miss both the bay and a shed full of explosive material right by the bridge. The driver missed the shed by mere feet -- it sounds kind of like an exciting ending to an action-adventure movie (San Mateo -- the hit of the summer!). They had to use two tow trucks to get the truck......

-- The al fresco SF Mayoral race debate, featuring full frontal. Gosh. What madcap wackiness will they unload on us next? [SFBG] -- "Not guilty," says Ed Jew. [Examiner] -- CW Nevius on Golden Gate Park a month later. [Chron] -- Earthlink's citywide wi-fi networks? Might fail. [LeftInSF] -- Jerry Brown's one-time top cop busted for DUI. [Oakland Tribune] -- This year's Halloween in the Castro theme: martial law. [Beyond Chron] -- White youths?......

Londonist are starting to think their city is getting just a little bit too expensive, when even Christian Slater can't afford to go out there. And there's no escaping, as local singer Lily Allen discovered when she was barred entry to the US. The British mapping agency caused further bad karma, by blocking a 3-D representation of London in Google Earth. But the smiles returned to Londonist's faces as they interviewed Baroness von Reichardt,......

We can't really get ourselves too worked up about the billboards or campaign finance allegations that Mark Leno's tossing around about his rival for the State Senate seat, Carole Migden (sorry) -- but we certainly do pay attention to her reckless-driving woes! The Solano County DA has decided to charge Migden with a misdemeanor based on her wild lane-changing and fender-bending ways from earlier this year. Like Paris Hilton, only without the DUI or the......

There's so much going on across the Ist-a-Verse that it's almost impossible to keep track these days. Fortunately, we do it so you don't have to! Londonist took a walk through Oliver Twist's London, thanks to a gorgeous map layer for Google Earth. They also caught up with modern-day fictional London, with the Fantastic Four and 28 Weeks Later. It was a week of insanity over at DCist. They started the week off with......

Here's todays sports wrap up...

-Cal just runs crazy over Texas A&M and beats them 45-10 as Marhshawn Lynch led the way with 111 yards and two TDs. Ray Ratto is impressed. But can Cal bring Lynch back? ...

We got two (two!) stories today about weird little traffic related mayhem. ...

Ahhh crap, 49er WR Antonio Bryant got nailed for DUI on Sunday night after the big win over the Seahawks. Bryant had two catches for 21 yards in the game. And later, 'round midnight, Mr. Reformed Hothead was clocked above 100 mph in a 2005 Lamborghini between Redwood City and San Mateo. Moron....

-Berkeley joins in on the Stadium fun. -Dems already start in with in-fighting: Pelosi backs John Murtha over Steny Hoyer. What kind of name is Steny anyways? ...

An early morning fire on Market and 10th Street in San Francisco is now safely out, but a fire battalion chief suffered non-threatening injuries to his shoulder when he fell through a floor of the burning building. Market Street was closed for three hours, but has reopened to traffic now. Those of you driving across the Bay Bridge this weekend, don't forget to take a copy of today's Chronicle with you, which lovingly diagrams out......

We find this latest spate of murder-suicides (his dentist????) too depressing to go into right now, and the Vitale murder just gets sadder and sadder -- so it's a Friday Blotter of Other Crime. Geraldo Rivera's brother Craig was arrested on a DUI in Walnut Creek. Craig Rivera was working with Mark Furhman on a story for his brother's new show, about the Pamela Vitale murder (of course). A jury sentenced Marques Lott to life in prison for the killing of a college student right outside the Rockridge BART station in 1997. The victim, Lisa Smith, was an English major at St. Mary's who was taking Chinese classes at Berkeley over the summer. Lott, who is schizophrenic, was off his medication and decided to kill someone coming home late at night. ....and care to try J. Lo's Glow? The SF Fire Department was called to Macy's yesterday afternoon after a number of patrons reported "very mild respiratory distress" from a mysterious odor. Macy's claims it wasn't coming from inside the store, but the SFFD couldn't tell either way. ...

First the pit bulls rise against the humans -- and now it's the trees! A man sitting on a bench and minding his own business in North Beach's Washington Square Park was almost brained as a huge branch of the shade tree above him snapped off and fell. Fortunately, the branch just barely missed him. The tree will be humanely euthanized (i.e., cut down). Prurient brunchers have a new stop for eggs over easy: Sausalito is up in arms about reports of a nude swimmer sunning himself outside the windows of Spinnakers. To Sausalito's chagrin, he likes to flip over and do the backstroke. And Sonoma County Judge Elaine Rushing was sentenced to 10 days in jail and three years of probation for a DUI in June, when she was found with a .19 blood alcohol level, having driven her car with two flat tires into a wall. Because she was a judge in the county where she was arrested, the state attorney general's office handled the case. Cheap irony alert: Judge Rushing was noted in Sonoma County for the harsh sentences she handed down to drunk drivers. Rushing will perform community service in lieu of the clink. ...

Sunny day! The California Supreme Court affirmed without comment the state appellate court's decision that the California domestic partnership laws do not violate the "marriage is between a man and a woman" Proposition 22. (FYI: Janice Rogers Brown didn't vote.) So Bert and Ernie now have all the same legal rights as any straight married couple under state law. This, however, doesn't cover benefits covered by federal law, so Ernie can't collect Bert's social security checks yet, or file a joint tax return with him. Still, though -- Bert is now welcome to sit by Ernie's bed at the hospital, buy a house with Ernie as a joint tenant, and -- awright! -- refuse to testify against Ernie when Ernie gets indicted for a DUI! (in state court only, though -- so Ernie better not get busted doing any illegal downloading or anything.) This ruling is independent of Mark Leno's push to get Prop 22 invalidated entirely, and the court cases trying to do the same thing. And in related news, Canada just made gay marriage legal in all 10 provinces and three territories, making it the third country after the Netherlands and Belgium, to do so. ...

A passenger was stabbed yesterday afternoon at the MacArthur BART station -- the reports are sketchy, but it sounds like a teenage girl got in an argument with another woman on a Fremont-bound train. They both got off at MacArthur, and the girl attempted to stab the woman in the stomach, missed, and got the woman in the shoulder instead. The girl fled, with the woman chasing after her, but got out of the station before anyone could catch her. We heard on KRON that the victim was transgendered and the girl may have committed a hate crime, but no one else seems to have confirmed that yet. A woman in Menlo Park was at home when she suddenly heard a window break and noises from her upstairs bedroom! Burglars! She called 911 and the cops hustled on over. They got her out. They surrounded the house. They cautiously went upstairs ..... and found a terrified red-tailed hawk that had crashed through the window and deposited its half-eaten meal (a baby crow) on the woman's bed. The bird was taken in by the Humane Society, which says it's doing fine and should be released back into the wild soon. "I never thought my windows were clean enough for this to happen," mused the homeowner. And former A's and Giants pitcher Vida Blue has been summoned to San Mateo County Court next Monday to explain why he hasn't done the community service he was sentenced to after his DUI arrest last year on 101. Blue was recently arrested on another DUI in Scottsdale, Arizona in March. ...

In tech news, stoned graphic designers were stunned when they realized that they had no idea that Adobe was going to swallow Macromedia whole. South Park laughs to keep from crying. After singlehandedly sparking off a department-wide investigation into drinking on the job after showing up to work drunk, Fireman Steve Gritsch manages to get a DUI! We're thinking it's a quiet protest against the Muni fare increase In the California Gubenatorial " ">Where......

Oh no! The fire captain who secretly resigned after Fire Chief Joanne Hayes-White launched an investigation into his drinking on the job, Steve Gritsch, just got busted on a DUI this weekend. Gritsch was driving south on 101 in Marin, when he drifted off to the side of the road and crashed into the guardrail. Gritsch informed the press that he was not injured and had no further comment. In other DUI news, the allegedly-drunk nanny who hit and killed two kids in Danville, fled the scene in a cab, and then went into hiding for two weeks in San Jose before she was caught cried all the way through the first day of trial. She cried so loud the judge had to stop the questioning of the witness temporarily. Oh, boo hoo hoo hoo -- she probably cried in the cab all the way to San Jose too. And speaking of people making ostentatiously-loud noises in court, Marcellus Cooksey, the guy who shot the tolltaker on the Golden Gate Bridge, pled not guilty at his arraignment yesterday. Cooksey, who shot the tolltaker in the stomach before being shot in the leg by a security guard, was rolled into court in a wheelchair with a splint on his leg, a bandaged hand, and a sweatshirt over his head. During the proceedings, he was shivering and "whimpered loudly several times." Owwwwww. ...

A real estate mogul in San Jose was murdered by a psychotic ex-girlfriend in Saratoga, who then unsuccessfully attempted to kill herself. The girlfriend had previously been charged with attempting to kill another ex-boyfriend, but when he left the country, the DA dropped charges. She had also previously attacked the mogul, but he had declined to pursue criminal action at that time. The latest reports have the ex-girlfriend snapping when she found the mogul......