Danielle Steel, former San Francisco resident and vocal critic of Teva sandals, was back in town this weekend for the San Francisco Art Fair at Fort Mason. The Chronicle's Leah Garchik reports Mrs. Steel was spotted when she "swooped in" to the festival sporting an "orange chubby", which is apparently some kind of furry or feathery shoulder covering...and not what you were thinking it was. If Garchik's description makes Mrs. Steel sound like she is getting ready for another How Weird Street Faire, you'll have to forgive the prolific author - she did admit she looks like a mess when she's in town. The author later purchased an oil painting of worn out sneakers by artist Gordon Smedt. [Chron] more ›

"San Francisco is a great city to raise children, but I was very happy to leave it. There's no style, nobody dresses up—you can't be chic there. It's all shorts and hiking books [sic?] and Tevas—it's as if everyone is dressed to go on a camping trip. I don't think people really care how they look there; and I look like a mess when I'm there, too." - Former Pac Heights resident and prolific romance novelist Danielle Steel. In a recent Wall Street Journal profile. [Hat tip: Refinery29] more ›

You've got to love local author Danielle Steel. Her daughters look nothing short of delightful, she successfully extracted herself out of the inner SF society sect, and her house looks like this. Which is why we were saddened to hear that Steel's bookkeeper, Tiburon resident Kristy S. Watts (also known as Kristy Siegrist), was pinched for skimming cream off of the Steel empire, embezzling over $768,000. Watts pleaded guilty back to the crimes back in September of 2009. more ›

Kristy Watts, a former accountant/assistant to Danielle Steel who also goes by Kristy Siegrist, was convicted in U.S. District Court today of one count of wire fraud and four counts of tax evasion, all amounting to $400,000. Ms. Steel, however, also filed suit in Marin County Superior Court Thursday (Ms. Watts lives in San Rafael), claiming that the former employee stole closer to $2.7 million, which she funneled directly into the remodeling of a home on G Street in San Rafael. Goes to show that being super-rich means getting ripped off if you aren't paying attention. But seriously, how do you not miss three mil for several years? more ›

• No. 25 is alive. Again. [WhatImSeeing]
• "OMGROFL" [Jameth]
• Breaking news: Danielle Steel's "glazed" Stinson Beach home for sale. [Curbed]

Remember when we posted on a recent article, claiming that Danielle Steel--that's "Ms. Steel" to you--spends $4 to $5 million a year at Barneys on shoes for herself and her children? At least, so says Barneys shoe sales associate John Rutenberg. Well, according to Danni--via a member of her posse, Cody--she does not. more ›

We love Danielle Steel. more ›

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Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells: 55. more ›

In terms of showy San Francisco-based author biographies, J. T. Leroy's always had Danielle Steel beat. She may have a zillion parking spaces in Pacific Heights and some colorful marital history, but Leroy's alleged life story, complete with trailer-trash teen mother and lurid sex-n-drugs anecdotes, is both mediapathic and the purported foundation for his fiction. It is not, however, any sort of foundation for author appearances. Leroy's fishy public appearances are a postmodernist's wet dream, and "Who is J.T. Leroy, really?" has turned into a parlor game among some folks. more ›

The media orgasmatron following Prince Charles and Duchess Camilla through their edge-free trip to San Francisco peed itself the other night as the royals on-deck chortled their way through that old chestnut, Beach Blanket Babylon. "Prince is Charming!" "Prince of a Guy!" "This Prince doesn't go by an unpronounceable symbol!" (okay, we made that last one up.) A whole coterie of hangers-on attended the soiree, including Duke Gavin and the fallen Lady Kimberly of Guilfoyle, smiling and bobbing slightly as the royals passed, but not holding hands. Gavin -- you must start seeing other people. Other attendees included former Secretary of State George Shultz (in his role as the husband of Charlotte Maillard Shultz, the Chief of SF protocol), Kamala Harris, the owner of the Giants, Willie Brown, and Danielle Steel. Mrs. Shultz also apparently made a cameo in the show, flying on a wire and dressed as Wonder Woman. Ah, of course. Prince Charles didn't seem to get most of the jokes, but apparently chuckled at a bit involving men dressed as poodles. And what would a visit to SF be without a protest? Giving it that special SF flavor, Medea Benjamin and Code Pink marched outside the theater, in pink wigs and chanting, "UK out of Iraq." Maybe the Prince would have paid more attention if they'd dressed as poodles instead. Picture by Chris Stewart of the Chron. That hat is so rad. more ›

No doubt soon to become a regular column! The plebes who merely rent in Pacific Heights were no doubt circling the blocks fruitlessly Saturday night in a vain attempt to find parking as 400 members of the upper crust of the upper crust -- the part of the pie that turns black and falls off in the oven, it's so upper crust -- all drove separate cars to Gordon Getty's 71st birthday party. No word if Danielle Steel let people use any of her 26 parking permits for the evening. The house was bedecked in roses, just like when Ben Affleck proposed to J. Lo, and these folks are so A-list, you don't even know who they are:

Then you had my knowledgeable colleague, glam Anne Lawrence, who could have stepped right out of "The Aviator." Over there was skier, surfer, and jeweler Erin Dianda, who avatars as Alana Leigh. ... Don't forget that other California blond dream, Beth Townsend ... or those hard-working women whose good works give Society a good name: Vanessa Getty in white ... snow angel Donna Ewald Huggins ... Allison Speer ... Tatiana Sorokko, whose Russian allure fits right in with this house, which is right out of Tolstoy in its grandeur, hospitality and commitment to bringing people together. ...