Well, Eminem is back with his on-again off-again Kim, but SF's sporadic First Lady's now not only on the outs with Gavin but now also with her employer, Court TV. Matier and Ross report that Ms.-Guilfoyle-if-you're-nasty has announced that she's going to be taking a job with FOX News, hosting a weekend law/crime show called "The Lineup." Kimbers coyly refused to say anything mean about her new channel, but you gotta wonder if new co-worker-to-be......

So much good animal stuff! First off -- remember "Show us your tits" Koko the sign-language gorilla? Two women gorilla handlers filed a lawsuit claiming that the director of the institution kept asking them to take off their shirts because Koko liked it? Lawsuit's been settled. A grandmother and granddaughter were thrown from a horse-drawn carriage during Petaluma's Santa Parade last weekend. Right as Santa and Mrs. Claus descended from a Petaluma tugboat to begin the festivities, an officer heard a crash and saw the grandmother being thrown from the carriage. The cop chased the two ponies, and managed to grab the 7-year-old granddaughter just before the ponies crashed the carriage into a parked car. The cop then got on his motorcycle and managed to corral the ponies right by Petaluma City Hall. And an entrepeneurial young man from Redwood City attempted to make some money by ransoming off a dog he found in the neighborhood. He called the owner, said he wanted money for the dog, and asked her to meet him by a local 7-11. The dog owner called the cops, who found the boy walking the dog. He confessed right away, turned over the dog, and the owner said she wouldn't press charges. Picture of Koko from Court TV...

Spring is a time for love. The flowers bloom, the sun shines, and the little creatures copulate. Today brings us not one, but two reports from New York about the Gavster's ex, Kim-Kim. First, from the Post, which we'll just quote because, well, they're evil and they require registration now: Court TV's Kimberly Guilfoyle — who moved here in January after filing for divorce from her workaholic husband, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom —......

So as it rains so hard, we stare out the window and we wonder, with a little sigh in the heart -- what is our plucky broken-hearted former first lady Kimberly Guilfoyle doing these days? Is she happy? Is she sad? Is she bundled up in a parka in the cold, cold city of New York? Well! Ask and ye shall receive. Making like a Gawker again, we turn to the Post's Page Six -- which reports that the soon-to-be-former Mrs. Newsom was making some heavy-duty eye contact and lingering into the night with a certain special someone! At a Court TV party for Catherine Crier's book about Scott Peterson, no less! So who could it be? Mayor Bloomberg? Mark Geragos? Robert Blake? Gothamist's adorable publisher Jake? No! You guessed wrong! It's MICHAEL BOLTON!!! ....maybe it's the hair? (Hey Kimberly: if he says he loves you -- he lied.) ...

Kimberly Guilfoyle formerly Newsom better make room for someone else on that carpet -- there's a new sassy San Francisco lawyer-correspondent making the rounds. The Post's Page Six reports that Apprentice runner-up Jennifer Massey is in talks with Court TV to become their newest reporter. Given that Massey is primarily a civil securities lawyer, we look forward to Court TV's fascinating wall-to-wall coverage of the Supreme Court arguments on loss causation pleading requirements under section 10 of the 1934 Securities Act. Massey is no longer listed as working at her former law firm of Clifford Chance, so we hope the final job interview with Court TV goes better than that one for Trump Central did. ...

You might not have been able to tell but we here at SFist have some mixed feelings about the Newsom breakup. On the one hand, there's been an increase in single female staff members showing up at SFist's headquarters with hopeful expressions. On the other, what are we going to do without Kimber? Those lips, that horsey smile. Dreamy. It seems like it was just yesterday she stood on the steps of City Hall,......

How do you know our esteemed First Couple has it made it? First there was big story in the New Yorker and now this- they made the New York Post gossip column! We are are so honored. According to the Post, Court TV anchor and part-time New York habitué Kimberly Guilfoyle Newsom was quite a hit as she gave a speech at the Empire State Pride Agenda fund raiser, subbing in for the hubbie......

Today's extra special someone got drunk with coworkers at five and forgot to post on time edition of our Bay Blogger feature, we call The Legal Reader to order. Local blogger and lawyer John takes on cases of interest in the news. With daily posts and sage commentary, John provides a valuable service the Court TV crowd while they're trapped at the office. Posts are usually excerpts from newspaper articles, wire services and legal rulings, generally about the personalities in the courtroom and precedent setting cases. It's a great digest for the news junky or legal gossip. He's particularly harsh on misbehaving judges and corrupt lawyers, and keeps a spotlight on local issues like Fajitagate. Plus he's been posting daily since all the way back in 2002, before most people had even heard the word 'blog,' making his archives a great resource for searching on older news stories, too....

While Dems accross the country swoon for the handsome Barack Obama and John Edwards, San Franciscans had a lot to be proud of - being the bluest town in the bluest state in the union. SFist thought that House Minority Leader, Rep. Nancy Pelosi [D-San Francisco] gave a great speech [RealPlayer, from C-Span], even if she did pull a few punches. And Da Mayor, Gavin Newsome, was fetted all week as a rising star in the party....