While his Holiness is more or less meh when it comes to non-consensual sex between a man and a boy, same-sex marriage just ain't cool in his book. So stop, says Pope Benedict. While not directly referencing yesterday's California Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage, the Pope spoke to family values groups in Europe (white trash chic!) yesterday, saying: The union of love, based on matrimony between a man and a woman, which makes......

Before we dig into Bay Area mischief, here are your ladies of-a-certain-age who have been arrested for having sex with their underage male students. All three teachers were arrested in over the last two weeks in Tampa, Florida. Ta-da. Cheers, ladies! ...

Photo credit: artolog Oh my. Um, yeah, we'll let Flickr's artolog explain the above. I've lived here for over 30 years, but it wasn't until a few weeks ago that I was initiated into one of the secret wonders of San Francisco, the so-called "two o'clock titty" of St. Mary's Cathedral, which appears at 2 pm, and is a staple of academic life for Catholic schoolboys. Hee. Ahem. Any of you kids born and......

-- Crime in Choir: CIC rocks it. Hard. For reals. Big time. One of the purest sounds coming out of SF these days, really. Brave the chill and head down to Potrero Hill to check them out. You won't regret it. Pink Mountain and Science of Yarba open at this anniversary party for Frenetic Records. The music starts at 10 p.m. at Bottom of the Hill; $10. -- It Is Fine! Everything Is Fine:......

We were walking home last night, and came across this Mini on Church Street. Front bumper flush with the truck, rear wheels right on the curb. How did this happen? Is the Mini driver the best parallel parker ever? Was the truck driver just being an ass? Either way, getting out's not going to be easy... Image credit: The author......

We're not one to laugh at church vandalism. Ever. But the following story in today's Mercury News is goddamn hilarious. And hilariously bad. Los Gatos police believe the suspects who scrawled swastikas and anti-gay messages on two churches and a pharmacy last weekend probably live in town, and investigators are hoping someone will turn them in. In some ways ... the vandal - or vandals - who hit St. Mary's Catholic Church, United Methodist......

BeyondChron's Paul Hogarth dares to go where many fear to tread: all up in Elisa Stephens' grill. Again. Hogarth writes about the Academy of Art College's plan to swallow up even more of San Francisco's prime real estate. TenderNob/downtown buildings such as the Lorraine Hansberry Theatre, the St. Brigid Church, and perhaps the building you're in this very second, have been gobbled up by l'Academy of Art College. Preferring the taste of rent-controlled apartments......

Black Friday, the Friday after Thanksgiving, the day where big retail shoppers traditionally break even for the year! Traditionally considered the biggest shopping day of the year! Is it retail therapy? ....Or is it kowtowing to the gods of capitalism and binding the workers who long to be free? Well, if you're heading out to Union Square today but feel kind of guilty about it, you can at least make yourself feel a little better......

Every year at Thanksgiving, you're bound to forget one or two critical items. A shallot, cooking twine, mushrooms, Ketel One -- something will slip your mind and you run the risk of having your Thanksgiving dinner collapse in on itself. And then you've ruined everything. Everything! But who can we prevent such yellow wallpapered hysteria? This is where you come in: do you know of any grocery stores that stay open late on Thanksgiving......

How the church appeared on November 13. This Friday -- Black Friday -- Michaela Alioto-Pier's little neighborhood that thrives on ridicule will become a little more ridicule-less. At 9 a.m., Pacific Standard Time, on the day of November twenty-third, two thousand and seven, the store at 2125 Chestnut will open its doors. And at that moment? Apple will welcome in its third San Francisco store, completing the trilogy started by its flagship location on......

-- Unspeakable (2007): Documentary about the life of Satanic Priest Steven Johnson Leyba, "ordained by Church of Satan founder Anton LaVey, is known in the underground art world as the 'Father of Sexpressionism.'" (Chortle) Screens tonight at 7:45 p.m., 9:05 at the Roxie New College Film Center; $6. -- The W. Kamau Bell Curve: Local comedian's show, it seems, is "designed to end racism...in about an hour." Praise Jesus. This night o' comedy will......

Whether official neighborhood status has been self-established by its residents or not, it seems Pierre (pronounced pyair-ee) Valley actually exists. In fact, based on the map posted on the neighborhood's website outlining the neighborhood boundaries, we lived in Pierre Valley for two years. But back when we resided on Tiffany Avenue (allegedly the longest block in the city), we lovingly referred to the neighborhood as the Intermission. Guilty. We were among those who tried to......

Why aren't you hiding under the covers yet? The city doesn't want to so much as hear you breathe come tomorrow. So, start upending those floorboards and crawling into that dank attic, or Gavin and Bevan will be coming to get you, Barbara. "We are praying for a peaceful evening, but are preparing for the worst," says Newsom. No, he's not talking about election night (heh, eh), but Halloween night. Which brings us to your......

Last night a little before midnight, Paul David Addis was arrested outside of Grace Cathedral, suspected of trying to burn down the historic church down. It seems that his neighbor called the police last night after overhearing him say something to the effect of "the cathedral wasn’t going to be there anymore." Yikes....

A loyal fan of the child-rearing arts -- she had taken nanny jobs at least twice before, even a job in Turkey, after answering online ads in the past; and even recently played Maria in her church community theater's production of The Sound of Music -- Katherine Ann Olson, 24, answered a Craigslist ad posted last week, looking for a nanny. The CL ad ultimately would lead to her death. Last Thursday, in Savage, Minnesota,......

The Red Sox has permeated nearly every facet of Bostonist's lives. When they're not live-blogging the games, waxing poetic about the games, thanking Curt Schilling for his splendid work, or telling Dane Cook to watch his hair, they're watching certain presidential candidates hop on the Red Sox bandwagon (sorry, Gothamist). The Sox are so branded on the local brain that people are using the Series to spice up their sex lives. Speaking of spice, Bostonist......

After House Democrats rescued him from censure today, Fremont Democratic Representative Pete Stark then apologized to members of the House and President Bush for his recent remark about "'soldiers getting their heads blown up...for the President's amusement."...

Writer, lead singer, guitarist, and founder of J-Church, Lance Hahn, passed away due to kidney disease complications on Saturday. He was 40. Although he formed J-Church in San Francisco during the halcyon days of the early '90s, he moved the group on to bigger things in Texas. There, he finally found success within the scrappy Austin-based punk scene. Read more about his life and music at Punk News and Austin 360. Image: Amanda Mauer......

Gothamist learned about the craziest urban nightmare come true: A huge python found in the bathroom pipes. It was also a nightmare for some Yankees fans, as manger Joe Torre declined to come back and manage the Bronx Bombers. At least the city's attempt to give some direction to subway riders was interesting, pranksters went shirtless at the Fifth Avenue Abercrombie & Fitch and the I Heart Brooklyn Girls calendars came out. And just......

After getting heat from the Catholic Church and death-by-fiery-car-crash-worthy Bill O'Reilly, Archbishop George Niederauer officially apologized for giving communion to the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. This is insane. Gay bars have been serving daiquiris to and sparing flaky bumps to closeted priests and assorted Catholics for years. And yet, a few gays can't come to their house of worship for a little body of Christ and some merlot? Such hypocrisy we'll never understand.......

-- Tease-O-Rama Meet 'N' Greet: Before the sluts of the weekend-long burlesque convention Tease-O-Rama have you sporting erections via cheeky performances, come meet them for an intimate night of, um, conversation. Also, '60s, '70s, and '80s will flood the dance floor care of the California Kid. Starts at 9 p.m. at Rickshaw Stop; $5. -- St .Francis Day Animal Blessing: Yeah, this sounds like the best thing, ever. Come get your dog or cat......

If you're unlucky enough to be a regular Muni rider, you may have followed the ongoing ridiculousness involving the NextMuni displays at Church Street Station. As you can see above, the display now shows information. True to form, that information manages to be both wrong and useless. As we noted when MUNI pretended to take public comment on the location of these displays, it makes no sense to put arrival information after you've already......

Screen shot captured Sunday afternoon by ciaran-sf at the Montgomery Street station. It went without K, T, L, or M outbound info since last Thursday, we're told. On the sunnier side, at least the outbound J-Church and N-Judah intervals are almost spot-on.......

From Lady_K via Contribute page, who found this note on Church Street in front of the Blockbuster near Market -- also, how on earth does that Blockbuster remain open for business? -- she found this detailed 9/11 to-do list, presumably written today: On 9/28/07 Everyone should stuff your bras, dress like a woman, act like a woman, and then tip a bus on 9/11. Chocolate Rain... Chocolater Rain… Uhhh This letter will self destruct in......

Oh No, Chris Kavanaugh! Berkeley's own Ed Jew, a Green Party member of the Berkeley rent board who was actually living (and litigating with his landlord) in Oakland, pled not guilty to three charges of voter fraud, one charge of perjury, and one of grand theft (for taking a stipend from the Berkeley rent board) yesterday. Kavanaugh spent Friday night living in the Santa Rita jail before being released on $30,000 bond, and will report......

Remember last week when we saw those fun pretend displays that Muni put up in Church Station for no discernible reason? We were down in Church Station yesterday, and we were pleased to see that MUNI has put something in at that location! All of that public comment that MUNI didn't bother to collect must have really told them something.... Follow us after the jump to see what MUNI did!......

We love documentaries -- they're like reality TV, with a popcorn stand! So you know we're totally psyched for SF Indiefest's sixth annual Docfest, which starts up tomorrow and goes through next week! Friday's big opening movie is "What Would Jesus Buy?", about the much-beloved street activist Reverend Billy and his Church Of Stop Shopping. Rev. Billy will be there in person with his message against overconsumption -- which we're sure is well worth spending......

The Arcade Fire came through Mountain View's Shoreline Amphitheatre last Friday. We have the pictures to prove this. A suddenly-rather-popular independent rock band, it's surprising that this little-group-that-could is suddenly playing arena-size venues. And what does The Arcade Fire sound like? Figure that the group's music is like some sort of 10-person raucously ad-hoc mix-up of Neutral Milk Hotel, Slipknot, Springsteen's E Street Band, and The Coen Bros' Hudsucker Proxy shrieking songs of broken/renewed faith......

You know we usually try to hoard up all the crime-type news for the Tuesday and Friday blotters, but there was enough vaguely unsettling news this weekend to warrant a post a little early, we thought. To wit: --Fernando Gonzalez, an 18-year-old Redwood City man, died after he fell into a vat of sulfuric acid. Gonzalez was working the early-morning shift at Coastal Circuits Factory this weekend, without a protective face mask, when he appeared......

Seattlest watches as a S.L.U.T. is born and Seattle Flickr users go nuts over a local art installation. A restaurant critic demands a Diner's Bill of Rights over a gnat next to her drink, and, in lieu of a Portlandist, Seattlest debates with itself over the identity of the Northwest's crown jewel. Seattlest also joins the guys from Fantagraphics for an ill-fated gun party in the woods. LAist saw national headlines soar this week with......