Fun story: Back in 2001, we took a date to Tu Lan because nothing breaks the ice better on a first date better than (arguably) the world's best imperial rolls. And cheap beer. That helps too. So, the two of us were led upstairs to sit at what appeared to be some sort of card table. We both sat down, opened our well-worn laminated menus featuring Julia Child on the cover, and began a night of gastronomic bliss/terror. A few minutes later, just as our waiter appeared, a cockroach dropped from the ceiling and onto our date's head, crawled down his forehead, and then fell to the floor. Our unfazed waiter squashed the roach with his shoe, wiped up the pressed corpse with a hand towel, and then asked for our order. Horrified, the two of us did what any reasonable person would do: we ordered two plates of said imperial rolls, some forgettable yet tasty chicken dish, and the remarkable lemon beef salad. We ate everything up, paid our tab, and — get this — tipped 15%. Why? Because that's Tu Lan. It remains one of our favorite joints in San Francisco for cheap, delicious Vietnamese food.

Fun story II: We were mugged outside of Tu Lan three years later.

Tu Lan: 8 - Sixth Street (at Stevenson), SF, 415-626-0927

FunCheapSF, the site that's always got your back in terms of monetary concerns, is hooking you up with a handy list of sweet half-price ticket deals for a variety of SF Sketchfest shows via Goldstar. Some of the shows on the list are already sold out, but tickets are still available for two Dr. God Improv shows tonight. Tomorrow is Billy the Mime and Brett Gelman’s Human Garbage and Bob’s Burgers Preunion. Plus, more on Sunday and in the coming weeks. Check out Goldstar's full list of deals for yourself. [Via FunCheapSF]

Head over to the Mission tonight for cheap beer and free peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (!) at Still Broke As Fuck. It all goes down at Doc's Clock, 2572 Mission. Details. [via Eater]

Act now, and you could be the lucky owner of the following for free!

• Hi Fi Stereo Radio 8 track Record player
  Want to listen to those sweet 8-tracks and LPs again?


• Ping Pong Table
  Ok for amateurs


• 1996 saturn owners book
  Own a 14-year-old Saturn? Here's the manual.


• Risograph Color Drums
  Attention designers


• Wood potting bench
  Want to spruce up your backyard? This will help you with that.


• Craftsman table saw & lawnmower
  Good deal for the handypeople out there.

Since we're all broke around here, Johnny Funcheap has compiled a list of his Top Five Best Cheap Valentine's Day Dates for this weekend. (Personally, our s.o. is cashing in our beer stein full of coins to fund a grand sushi dinner for us tonight.) Thanks, Johnny!

Saturday My Love: A Day of Fragrance, Fashion, Cupcakes & Cocktails
A full day of fragrance workshops, a lingerie trunk show, a cupcake food cart from Mission minis and cocktails.
Saturday, 2 to 4 p.m. // Candystore Collective (3153 16th St) // free

Love Letters to Parks
Write a “love letter” to your favorite park at the event or online, and enjoy the free food, crafts, give-aways and find love at the Neighborhood Parks Council "Park Dating Game.”
Sunday, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. // Dolores Park (Dolores and 18th St) // free

Guys and gals, clear out your closets and throw your discarded duds into the giant pile at CellSpace (2050 Bryant St) tomorrow night, as part of the Massive Men's And Women's "Cool Cat" Clothes Swap For Fashionably Conscious Cultural Creatives. (We're sure glad they didn't use the term "frugalistas.") You never know what gems you might find in exchange! (Or in yours truly's experience, we just end up with more crap that gets donated later on.) Enjoy some food and dancing while you swap.

Donations are as follows: $10 cover with bag of clothes and potluck dish, $20 with just a bag of clothes, and $25 without any clothes or a dish. The event runs from 7 to 11 p.m.

Eater has word, via Thrillist, that the Four Seasons bar, succinctly called Seasons, has reduced the price of their wines by half until the end of September. (Blessed be!) That is to say, they've sliced the price of "once pricey action like Francois Jobard Chard, and Stag's Leap Cabernet." And what with a new bar menu--which we'll review and post at a later date--this means more tastiness, not to mention tipsiness, for your dollar.