Oh yeah, we almost forgot. They're getting married this weekend somewhere in Canada at some sort of horse breeding ranch. Or wherever. Billed as an "old-fashioned wedding social," featuring "wrangler events, a cowboy cookout and barn dancing," you can read Matier and Ross getting damp over Saturday's most unholy affair here.

Anyway, while we coax Beth Spotswood down from the Golden Gate Bridge with chilled vodka and a crushed Xanax, feel free to use this post as the Newsom-Siebel plebeian guest book. Will the second time be the charm for Newsom? How much discomfort will Jen feel when her hymen breaks during the wedding night? Will Chris Daly be in attendance? How long do you give this union? Let these two kids know how you feel.