Sigh. PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) has asked Ben & Jerry's to start using breast milk in their ice cream. While it looks like nothing more than a vile publicity stunt (or as Jameth puts it, an Onion article), we'll let the letter PETA sent to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield speak for itself. Ahem: September 23, 2008 Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, Cofounders Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc. Dear Mr.......

Snapped up by Octoferret, this bit of amber graffiti is also a spooky optical illusion! GRADE: B-......

Oh my. Here we have a shot of a protester taken at Saturday's CoS protest at the Washington/Columbus/Montgomery intersection. Since we found it at encyclopediadramatica, we have to ask: real or fake? For all of you randy readers, the NSFW version, complete with visible areolas and such, can be found after the jump. Enjoy.......

-- The Breasts of Sherry Glaser: The protest-y Miss Glaser's comedy and peace activism show runs the gamut from her unsheathed mammary glands to an interpretation of 9/11 and the Twin Towers falling down. Oh my. (Warning: audience participation will occur!) Starts at 7:30 p.m. at The Marsh; $10-15. -- The Velvet Teen: The Velvet Teen rocks. Hard and with perfection. Because that's what they do in Santa Rosa. Be sure to see them......

Last week's winner, the San Jose Metro. Alas! They haven't updated their site for this week yet, and we didn't manage to snag a hard copy of the paper, so they'll have to forfeit in the Weekly of the Week contest for the week. Next up, let's call it for the SF Weekly. Ephraim the Track Bike is back! And he mentions us! We love you, Ephraim the Track Bike! Did Ed Jew's people spearhead......

About 24 hours after we posted about how the diesel lines were hidden from NextMuni's view, guess what happened? Muni blinked; someone flipped a switch; and now 32 additional lines have been added to the official site. You're welcome. Don't say we never did nothing for you. Hopefully this will make up for how we apparently RUINED EVERYONE'S DAY last Tuesday by trying to make fun of some fucking buses. Now let's call it......

-- Lavay Smith and Her Red Hot Skillet Lickers: Not only does this "Basie-esque" outfit perform lush jazz and blues tunes, but the chanteuse is pretty funny in between songs. Check them out tonight at 7 p.m. at the Top of the Mark, InterContinental Mark Hopkins Hotel, One Nob Hill, (999 California); $10. -- Joan Rivers Theatre Project: Though you're sure to hear even more about her pendulous, sagging breasts, her new project is......

Self-consciously located on the none-to-glamorous Howard Street strip between Seventh and Eights Streets, yet close enough to downtown and its blue-glass splendor, Hillary Clinton’s campaign headquarters opened up yesterday (complete with a Breasts Not Bombs melee [NSFW]) for those of you who want to volunteer, get a "Hillary 4 Prez" poster or five, or gawk. We went over to take some photos of Hillary-whipped worker bees, but as of noontime today, the place seem......

Spring is when we get busy here in the Ist-A-Verse. Very busy. But, after staying bundled-up indoors all winter, it's nice for us to be out, about, and collecting things to write about for you. Here's a glimpse at what's been keeping your favorite citybloggers busily away from home and out of bed. For LAist, strong winds attacked LA on the same day the Feds raided the Crips. Not to fear, though: the Japanese version......

Love, valor, compassion. We always wish our new year's resolutions were more altruistic, but year after year, our desire to look better "and sexier" tops the list . On January 1st we usually pledge to streamline our wardrobe, work out like a maniac and go on a possibly life threatening diet. So to start 2007 in style we decided to get rid of all of these resolutions in one fell swoop: a 5 minute 10 lbs slimming strategy, guaranteed to spice up our sex lives and please our inner diva, AKA a corset. ...

A complaint was filed against the San Mateo's Coroner office recently alleging inappropiate behavior and sexual harassment. That's in the coroner's office. The report claims that the San Mateo County Coroner, Robert Foucrault made jokes about one's orientation and engaged in sexual banter. The complaint also mentions as leading to the unhealthy environment "a life-sized skeleton decoration with breasts" and a "figurine of a naked woman draped with a veil on a birthday cake." Oh, and we can't forget about the alleged mooning. How could you forget about an alleged mooning? It's just like an episode of the "The Office" except in a mortuary and not a paper company. ...

They came in peace, they asked to be taken to our leader -- and it looks like our leader is online casino GoldenPalace.com. Remember that awesome picture of the duck with the alien inside? SOLD! to the collectors of awesome Internet marginalia for $9600 on EBay, all to benefit the International Bird Rescue Research Center. GoldenPalace.com's last Bay Area purchase was Jerry Garcia's toilet (subsequently stolen before delivery). Other recent GoldenPalace happenings include their purchase......

Our friends down at LAist beat us to the punch with the emerging news on kinda crappy Bay Area artist Thomas Kinkade. This LA Times piece asserts that, among other things, proudly Christian Kinkade "heckled illusionists Siegfried & Roy in Las Vegas, cursed a former employee's wife who came to his aid when he fell off a barstool, and palmed a startled woman's breasts at a signing party in South Bend, Ind." These allegations......

Oh, how we adore the Primitive Screwheads. Our first experience with them was at the final (sob) performance of their most glorious Evil Dead: Live, in which the guerilla (to wit: they rehearse in whatever unoccupied classrooms they can find at a local college, their props all seem to come from Mythbusters:The Home Version, and we're not really clear on their adherence to copyright law) theatre company brilliantly deconstructed the classic Sam Raimi trilogy......

SFist was recently contacted by local artist Alyssa Morgan, who had an interesting story to tell -- apparently, she had been contracted to provide art for the grand opening of John Colins, a new bar in SOMA. Throughout the creation process a member of the bar's ownership team viewed the art, but once delivered to the bar the art remained for only one evening. The reason? The bar's owners determined that her work, which......

[Ed. Note: Oh, we are so happy right now. New SFist Derrick of Obsession with Food just wrote a wonderful pair of recipes that would make the perfect wintry, local feast. Since the Trimethyldioxypurist is off in the hinterlands this week, we wanted to get this up right away. So please welcome a new foodie to the table. Bon appetit!] We're getting a bit tired of winter's oranges, but juicy, so-red-they're-violet blood oranges caught......

Investigators have discovered that the fire that killed a fire captain in Los Gatos was caused by either a burning candle or incense stick used to celebrate Chinese New Year. The homeowners had been using the room as a prayer shrine, despite having previously been warned not to use the room at all after a previous fire had started in that same spot. The fire melted through a power line on the roof of the house, which then fell into a puddle of water, electrocuting the firefighter. Two female employees of Woodside's nonprofit Gorilla Foundation have sued the group and its president for sexual harassment. The employees claim that the president, Penny Patterson, informed them that Koko the signing gorilla, who is cared for by the Foundation, has a "nipple fetish" and pressured them on numerous occasions to take off their shirts and show Koko their breasts. Patterson is reported to have said to Koko, "Koko, you see my nipples all the time. You are probably bored with my nipples. You need to see new nipples. I will turn my back so Kendra can show you her nipples." In sign language. Patterson also allegedly informed the women that displaying their breasts to Koko was a "normal component to developing a personal bond with the gorilla." Koko should go on the Howard Stern show! ...

While it's always fun to snark on the Religious Right, lately it's just been too darn easy. After taking on Sponge Bob and "No Name Calling Week," those whacky Bible-thumpers are at it again, this time with yet another cartoon (do they watch anything else?) In this case, the upsetting thing is a cartoon airing on PBS, a cartoon about a cute little bunny named Buster. Postcards From Buster is about Buster's adventures travelling to......

It's no big surprise when we here at SFist announce that craigslist has changed all of our lives in some way. Heck, it's even one of our interview questions: "I have found/sold/bought the following on craigslist:". Even if you've somehow managed to navigate the Bay Area without calling on craigslist for an apartment, car, or "casual encounter", craigslist has improved your life by giving you something fun to do on the internet. If you haven't......

roundup of the Bay Area weeklies...

Having trouble picking what to rent next from Netflix? Bought every DVD in existence and need to see what'll be out this week? Really bored at work and looking for something to read? Well, we here at SFist are here to help with a listing of some of the big titles being released this week on DVD. And if you're still having trouble deciding, we'll give you our very own Pick o' the Week. Here......