Last week's winner, the Guardian. The SF People's Organization is having a meeting this Saturday. Letters about guns in the Castro. Everything is better with strippers -- union woes, men against women, and a no-fatties proposal at the Lusty Lady. Hating on fixie bikes -- and big ups to SFist Sarah L for pointing out to us how awesomely combative the comments in response have gotten (typical comment: "My god man, do you have an......

Last week's winner: The East Bay Express. What? No letters about Cody's? Fret not -- there's an article. (We had no idea the reason why there's no books on the shelves there now is because they were behind on their bills!) Also -- neighbors rat out neighbors for loud parties and for opening day-care centers. Cover: Fat acceptance movement (medical, civil rights, artistic, online). Good article, which makes the no fatties cartoon running later in......

Last week's winner, the SF Weekly: Matt Smith on defrauding the retarded. Chris Daly thinks the SFSOS flyer about him is funny. Cover article: graffiti artist Vulcan. Win a free copy of season 2 of the American Office. Meredith eats outside. Vashti Bunyan, the Silver Jews, and the Headphone Festival. Next up, the Guardian. Hey, Vashti Bunyan and the Silver Jews again! Tim Redmond had a nice time at the Sue Bierman memorial, but didn't......

Last week's winner, the SF Weekly. Do you want to be a fill-in copy editor for the Weekly? First question: does fill-in need a hyphen? Also, you must know Quark. We skipped Matt Smith this week, we just weren't up for the hate. The Apologist on traffic. Can we also confess that we don't really get the Ephraim the Track Bike column, though we do love it. Advice on effective protesting. Cover article: a con......

We were out of the area for most of this week, so we're only just now getting our hands smudgy with the alternative press! (Virtually smudgy; we're also reading everything online, because we can't be bothered to go outside and hunt for weekly distribution boxes that still have weeklies in them halfway through the distribution cycle.) Sorry for the delay! Last week's winner, the East Bay Express: Bottom Feeder was attacked by a Canadian goose......

Last week's winner, the Bay Guardian. The theme of the Local News section is "Editor's note: Alix Rosenthal [District 8 candidate] is the domestic partner of Guardian city editor Steven T. Jones. Jones did not participate in the assigning, writing, or editing of this story," as the Guardian weighs in on both the Castro Halloween fight and an update on the Pendulum. Also, Chris Daly can't get any documents under the sunshine laws either. Why......

Last week's winner, the East Bay Express. The man who invented the suction-cup Garfield was defrauded by a friend. A civilly-disobedient city of Walnut Creek refuses to sign a California state loyalty oath, and can't get paid. Cover article: Michael Savage. The title "Savage Hate" is pretty good. Cat show this weekend. SF Jewish Film Fest. I Like Eating satisfies as always, at the second brewpub in California, and the new food critic checks out......

Last week's winner, the Bay Guardian. Hey, their website's back up again (wish we could say the same for ours). Also -- new topical blogs. We love how Bruce Brugman's blog says "Bruce will not be posting until the end of the month." Thanks for letting us know! Redmond thought it was neat that lots of people went to Dolores Park to watch the World Cup. Shhhh, don't tell anyone, but Gavin Newsom is really......

It's been so long since we did this, we don't even remember who won the last time we read the weeklies -- so we're kicking it off with the Metro, because they have the most easily-accessible cover art on their website. Cover: World Cup madness in the South Bay! We had no idea you could get Lyme disease out on the West Coast. RonGon should try and look sorrier in all his public appearances. And......

Last week's winner, the San Jose Metro: Again, we're reduced to reading it online, as our source wasn't in the South Bay this week. Cover article: fashion in the San Jose city hall. What are all these positions we're voting on for? A handy-dandy guide. Exciting inside SJ politics with the Fly, and their new SJ politics blog, SV411.org. Al Gore and his movie. Skateboarders come to town. And soft-shell crab. Next up, the SF......

Last week's winner: the Guardian: Redmond drops the f bomb on the front page today: Prop C is not a Chris Daly power grab, darn it! Krissy Keefer gets her Green primary endorsement on the editorial page (though they note "she virtually has no hope of beating Nancy Pelosi." Oops, last week's endorsement issue forgot to mention that they're endorsing Leno in Assembly District 13. Union-busting Whole Foods might be moving to the Haight. Cover:......

Last week's winner, the East Bay Express: A letter-writer urges the food critic to open his heart to the magic and love that is Cafe Gratitude. Typos in Ellen Corbett's mailers. Open relationships, without using the word "polyamory" ("I hate that word. It's so '70s.") Cover: going wireless in West Oakland (and other East Bay cities). Steak in Danville. New music guy on Neil Young, and Sick Of It All about the lead singer's......

Last week's winner, the Bay Guardian: Mocking Dede Wilsey and Newsom about the DeYoung parking situation. The Guardian gets distracted from its single-minded focus on Village Voice LLC to decry MediaNews's purchase of the San Jose Merc News. Letter from a Peoples Temple survivor asking for further investigations into a CIA conspiracy. Hipsters worry that they're accidentally causing gentrification in Oakland. Sonic Reducer reviews an album of songs sung by actors. You know, we may have to download the version of Ewan McGregor singing Sade (or Jennifer Garner singing a show tune. It's totally awesome to work out to!!!!!.) A review of the Flipper reunion show from April 8. It took them a month to get that up? New brunch place in Noe Valley, Shanghai soup dumplings in the Sunset. Cover: Daniel Clowes. And SFist Eve's horoscope: be more confrontational. Watch out, crazy commenters! The SF Weekly: Nate Cavallieri, ex-Weekly writer, won a journalism award for his cover article about a guy who works with gang members. Congratulations, Nate! Matt Smith on Chris Daly, Mission Housing, and someone saying that Daly speaks with a "forked tongue" -- outraged Matt Smith spittle flying everywhere! N.B.: Matt Smith reports that Chris Daly has adopted a policy of "not speaking to me." Gay cop sues. Orphan pigeon rescue. Cover article: why won't the SF Unified School District back smaller schools? Meredith goes BBQ, while SFist Ced roasts some ribs of his own! And Savage Love: do any fetishists want to buy a letter-writer's breast milk? Direct all responses to Dan Savage, not us. The EBX's Best Of issue, and the Metro -- after the jump....

Last week's winner, the East Bay Express: Vote for SFist in the EBX Readers' Poll! We love the chicken holding a sword with its foot in this week's Dream Comic. A company that puts prank pink flamingos on people's lawns (called "Flamingo Surprise"). Cover article: The Coup, along with that picture of their album with the World Trade Center blowing up. Rob Harvilla tells us his departure for the Village Voice isn't us, it's him. Good luck out there on the cold East Coast, Rob! Have fun with Christgau! Lit section. Hyphy hyphy hyphy hyphy hyphy. And SFist Eve's horoscope: she's going to "find the passion to unite what at first glance seems like an unlikely gathering of associates." That's us over here at SFist! The SF Weekly: Vote for SFist in the SF Weekly Readers' Poll! The Apologist on the 1906 festivities, titled "Ready to Rumble." ("Honestly, I'm disgusted. This is a time to be celebrating earthquakes, not studying them." Ha!). Sucka Free City columnist (male) gives birth on Second Life. It's a girl! Cover article: Jewel thieves. Book section: The guilty pleasure of the Da Vinci Code. SFIFF. Meredith eats French! Good thing Ced's away, as we expect he was driven to heights of fury by the part where Meredith asks why a confit of rabbit isn't the same as a rabbit terrine. (We don't know the difference but we're sure our Gastronome does!). And Dan Savage infuriates bisexuals again. The Guardian and the Metro, after the jump, along with the Weekly of the Week....

Last week's winner, the SF Weekly: Letters: Pro-sex worker letter, and a letter pointing out race- and class-based disparities in local coverage of murdering moms. Matt Smith on the DeYoung parking shenanigans. Ways to avoid paying your taxes (shouldn't this article have run before taxes were due?). Videojournalist Josh Wolf gets subpoenaed by the feds over last year's anarchist riots. Cover article: SFIFF. Improv actors pick the theater critic's how-we-met story to act out on stage -- hilarious. Meredith Brody takes more relatives out to eat. She has a very large family, doesn't she, Ced? Matmos. The Bouncer's not drinking this week -- take care of yourself, Bouncer! You sound a little down. And Savage Love -- whatever you do, don't burn your youthful hijinks onto a CD-Rom, fool! Next up, the San Jose Metro: San Jose should stop embracing sprawl. The Fly: Fast food politics, with a Subway application and some political donations shenanigans by King Eggroll. There's an excellent picture of a kid slaying a dragon in the California Theater Company's production of "The Reluctant Dragon," but it's not online. Curse you, Metro! Cover article: the San Jose downtown district 3 election. The chef from Campton Place's new restaurant in Mountain View. Project Runway winner Chloe Dao is in San Jose this weekend. SFIFF. Pick out the fake hyphy-related vocabulary words from this list. And SFist Eve's horoscope: rescue a talking parrot from a burning pet store. Get on that, Eve! The EBX, the Guardian, and the pick of the week after the jump. Picture from the Weekly's Sucka Free City column....

Last week's winner, the East Bay Express: Bottom Feeder on whether the Concord mayor is anti-abortion, and the bad body odor of a Berkeley narcotics officer alleged to be on the take. Photoshopping pandas in Oakland. (check out that awesome picture!) Do conservatives have fewer friends? Cover article: no, you can't void your mortgage by claiming that US currency has no value (this is a pretty cool article). Cafe Gratitude in Berkeley has bad service. I Like Eating charms us again with a visit to Rudy's Can't Fail Cafe. And Harvilla on the Kim Deal musical everyone's talking about. The Bay Guardian: Hey, new website design! Chris Daly for Assembly? An entertaining editors' note (scroll down) about whether or not the Guardian believes that vegetables feel pain as they're being digested! Oh, advertiser Rainbow Grocery, always on the cutting edge (ouch! watch that edge!) The inside scoop on the Haight-Ashbury Free Clinic brouhaha. Hating Berkeley law professor John Yoo ("torture is a-okay by me!"). On The Sidelines' hilarious cartoon about bands with three repeated word names ("Die Die Die?" "Tony Toni Tone?" "!!!" ?). Cover article: Matt Gonzalez on Jonestown (and the Guardian shamefacedly admits that they totally thought the Peoples' Temple was okay at the time.) Bettie Page lookalike contest at Thee Parkside this Friday. And SFist Eve's horoscope: it implies that she's currently in a "crazy place" right now -- hey, Double Team, that ain't nice! The SF Weekly and the Metro, after the jump -- along with the Weekly of the Week....

Last week's winner, the Bay Guardian. A list issue! We love lists. Coverage of the Battlecry dueling rallies last week. Annalee shares some blogger feelings. Johnny Ray Huston also thinks villainy's name is Stephen on Top Chef! The club reviewer preemptively mocks himself. Book section. A review of the Whitney Biennial by SFist Katie. And -- oh, SFBG! Win preview tickets to Brick by doing a word search? Come on, let's go rebus! Nothing beats the little cartoon eye, a heart, and a picture of a female sheep. Next up, the Metro: Circus protestors at the HP Pavilion. (n.b.: your correspondent represents these protestors at the day job, but had nothing to do with getting the article in the Metro, we swear. It was pretty funny when our client ran up to us yesterday and gave us a copy of the Metro, which we were already stressing out about picking up.) Soccer is cool. The Fly on the guy who wants to buy the Merc News. Cover article: giant squid! This article is like Moby Dick, only with squids, in California, and without the guy named Starbuck. Thin-crust pizza in SJ. An article on Edvard Munch. Aaaaaaaah! Todd Inoue's second SXSW roundup -- hey, he stopped by Austinist's secret Flaming Lips show! And SFist Eve's horoscope: 6714 is NOT your lucky number. After the jump, the SF Weekly, the EBX, and the pick of the week....

SFist Sam was kind enough to take a picture for WRTW for us -- isn't it gorgeous? Thanks, SFist Sam! Last week's winner, the SF Weekly: Tributes to the dearly departed PUNI, including a hilarious letter from the NextBus people that we know SFist MattyMatt will enjoy. New section called "Sucka Free City," with a profile of Killing My Lobster. Where will illegal indoor smokers go now that Sherlock's Haven is closing? Cover: land use......

Last week's winner, the Guardian: Hey, we've received late-breaking word of some layoffs at the Bay Area's Oldest Alternative Newspaper. Hope you guys are all doing okay. Onto the pre-layoff news: It's the Freedom of Information issue! Hey, here's some free information -- the Guardian laid off some people. Slumlords, first in a three-part series. Cover: FOIA, FOIA, FOIA. Vanessa Hua gets some love for breaking the Kevin Shelley story. RIP, Octavia Butler. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs are so much better than No Doubt! New DVD magazine by McSweeney's. Bars and Clubs insert: how to open your own bar, and barronista gossip. And SFist Eve's horoscope: a gust of wind could destroy your potential this week, so proteck ya neck! (don't feel bad, SFist Eve, our horoscope says that our inner fears have paralyzed us. Why, we can hardly move our fingers to type this post!) Next, the East Bay Express: Bottom Feeder! A collection of funny Jerry Brown quotes, and an update on the social worker that let a teenager slash an old lady's throat in Berkeley. Ferries aren't really going to save us in an earthquake, are they? (no.) Cover: using citrus-based anti-bacterial lotions to stop AIDS (really!). Chinese buffets. Rob Harvilla warns about the dangers of Dem Franchise Boyz's song "Lean wit It, Rock with it": "If you lean wit it at the exact moment the person behind you chooses to rock wit it, you may collide and knock each other unconscious." That wins the prestigious "sentence of the alternative week" award! And trendy band alert: Arctic Monkeys. And hey, the SF Weekly's Nate Cavalieri shows up across the bay! Lean wit the SF Weekly, rock wit the Metro, after the jump. Also, the weekly of the week!...

Last week's winner, the Guardian: Gavin just wants to be able to park his cars downtown, guys! Congratulations, A.C. Thompson, for winning a Polk Award for your article about the deplorable conditions in SF public housing! Cover: This week in Steven Jones's ongoing Burning Man series -- Burning Man goes to Katrina. A review of 50 Cent's videogame, f/ the vocal talents of G-Unit, Dre, and Eminem. Get Rich Or Die Trying indeed. Someone yells at the Sonic Reducer to stop chewing her gum so loud at the Jeff Tweedy show. Email newsletter Books To Watch Out For, by the former publisher of the Feminist Bookstore News. We're signing up right now! And the newest restaurant at 22nd and Guerrero. The East Bay Express: A profile of the very busy doctor trying to recall Schwarzenegger. Goth-metal scapegoating in the Scott Dyleski trial. Cover article: Couples who buy houses instead of getting married. Peaches Christ went to Penn State? Go Nittany Lions! Ayelet Waldman's entertaining solipsism continues. Our secret boyfriend Rob Harvilla goes to the 107.7 Bone Rock Girl competition. Going all James Frey on Motley Crue's The Dirt. And SFist Eve is at the helm of her personal Starship Enterprise! Beam us up, SFist Eve! After the jump, the SF Weekly and the SJ Metro, and the Pick of the Week. ...

Last week's winner, Bay Guardian: Craigslist is destroying the fabric of America. We love this new news shorts column: Daly! Mocking Jordana Thigpen. Tim Goodman the TV critic was on Nancy Grace the other day? About the murder rate? Was this an interview about Nash Bridges? British grocery stores. Cover article: indie boy and Mission resident Kelley Stoltz. Rilo Kiley overhype begins. Hey Trimethldioxypurist, check out this article on the French-press Starbucks challenge! Indiefest! Color a Curious George to win a family four-pack to see the movie. And SFist Eve's horoscope: recognize your own inner strength and don't be distractible (hey! look over there!) The SF Weekly: Cover article: Rilo Kiley overhype! Matt Smith on the central subway plan. PUNI suggests a "Folsom St. Prison Fair." Ha! In what was clearly going to be the cover article until the Rilo Kiley overhype began, an SF group producing radio shows for Nepal. Hey, the guy who produces the Daily Show is coming to town. Ced on Meredith. ...and oh no! Music columnist OK Then is leaving the Weekly too! What in the Tom Walsh is going on over there? After the jump: the East Bay Express and the Metro. ...

Last week's winner, the San Jose Metro. Phil Angelides made all his money in real estate. The Merc News gets in a screamy match with Baron Davis of the GSWarriors -- literally! Yay. Cover article: Muslim comedians (including this guy). Cirque du Soleil goes South Bay. Picture of Gillian Anderson looking like Madonna. And Straight Dope: can moms really lift cars off their children? Maybe. Next up, the SF Weekly. The editor's note re......

Last week's winner, the new tabloid-style redesigned Bay Guardian. Pool of blood! Murders! Headless Body In Topless Bar! All for their 40th anniversary. Looks good -- but this type is hard to read. Various outrages in our city. And man, we thought this "Wade versus Redmond" ad on page 17 for the Third Street Gym referred to Tim Redmond. The redesign's throwing off our skim-o-tron! Cover: The SFPD ignoring Asian-American gang stabbings in the Tenderloin. And Sonic Reducer declined to go to a party with a Fleetwood Mac cover band featuring Joanna Newsom as Stevie Nicks!?!!?!??! (Well, it was raining pretty hard last week....) Making a triumphant return, the San Jose Metro!. Second Amendment advocates in San Jose use Chris Daly's own Prop H to get the right to bear arms into the state Constitution. Please, no more propositions! Haven't we learned from our mistakes of the past? Cover article: excellent Chinese subregional food in Milpitas (Darda rules). Why do alternative-rock listeners have to go all anti-Latino about the switchover at 104.9? And SFist Eve's horoscope: she should expand her spiritual life. After the jump, the two New Times publications (the Weekly and the EBX). ...