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In Monday's morning call: prepping for watercooler chatter with a Super Bowl ad roundup, Michael Bauer's weekly recommendations, a fire hydrant geyser, The Summit's replacement, football alternatives and an Iran war protest march.

Top Chef will hit its tenth season this year, and they are looking for San Francisco-based gastronomic talent for the big one-zero. Might you be the next cheftestant? While Bravo's food competition show shows slight signs of age — let's face it, it's no RuPaul's Drag Race; a show on par creatively and critically as Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, and even Bad Girls Club, it is the most important thing on TV right now — they still showcase major cooking prowess and drama, something the Bay Area has in spades.

The saga of Ross Mirkarimi and the ongoing domestic abuse trial involving his Venezuelan-born wife Eliana Lopez continues this week with Lopez hiring her own lawyer for the upcoming trial, and another hearing scheduled Wednesday to discuss overturning the stay-away order to allow Mirkarimi visitation rights with his two-year-old son, whom he has not seen since January 13. A judge refused to lift the order last week, but agreed to a new hearing this week. Lopez, meanwhile, has retained Paula Canny, one of the lawyers who represented Barry Bonds in his perjury case.

On Saturday night, Joe Payne captured this shot of a fire hydrant geyser shooting water into the air like it just didn't care. Wee! The scene happened on Folsom and 20th in the Mission District. Mission Mission has some choice shots of the blast as well. Oh, and check out video footage, shot and edited by Michael Gondry, below.

Because we are contractually obligated to share every instance of copper wire theft in the greater Bay Area, we bring you the latest report from Benicia where KTVU has discovered evidence that the reprehensible practice of poaching wiring has hit a new defenseless target: California's already underfunded state parks. While the stolen copper wire at Benicia State Recreation Area maybe not be as impressive as stealing an historic church bell or a large pelican statue, thieves in the area have already caused an estimated $30,000 in damage in the past year.

"Owen" by Bob Horowitz.

An enraged mother aboard a crowded Muni bus (we believe it was the 12-Folsom) on Thursday evening clobbered another woman in the head screaming "I need my space," then stole the woman's bag of "medicine." The suspect exited the bus near 24th and Folsom with three children in tow. She remains at large.

Today's exercise in unnecessary neighborhood naming comes from the heart of Mid-Market where the recently arrived Dottie's True Blue Café and Pearl's Deluxe Hamburgers are doing wonders to rehab the area's stabby reputation. The Chronicle's resident Jimmy Buffett fan is on the scene, discovering the key to the "Sixth and Market streets makeover 2.0":

So, a piece of antique brick wall adorning the cornice of an East Oakland liquor store crumbled and fell to the sidewalk early this morning, and for lack of any new Occupy shenanigans or anything more worthy to cover, every news outlet in town is all over this story.

Anti-gay reporter Roland Martin was at it again during Sunday night's Madonna concert (cleverly sandwiched between a football game) when the CNN political analyst took to Twitter to tell his followers to beat any guys interested David Beckham's H&M underwear ad. Behold:

A 61-year-old woman was shot and killed in her Santa Rosa home Sunday afternoon, just before the Super Bowl kickoff around 2 p.m. Neighbors heard a gunshot, followed by a woman screaming, and saw a man between the ages of 35 and 40 leave the apartment at 934 Clark Street and drive off in a silver car. The motive for the killing is still unknown.

Lolz. Tagline: "Apple Scotland: Havin' a wee bit of trouble." Siri has English and Australian accent options, but maybe it's time for a Scottish one as well? [via WOW]

Saturday's Giants FanFest brought out true Giants fans for the chance to mingle with some of their favorite players, lolligag on the field, and get a taste for the upcoming 2012 season. (Buy your tickets now!) Here's a scene of the fan frenzy that went down at AT&T Park over the weekend.

MUSIC: Tonight's installment of the monthly Communion club, which originated in the U.K. and was founded by Mumford & Sons' Ben Lovett, features a stellar line-up, including The Entrance Band, Tim Cohen, Hot Lunch, Matt Baldwin, and Ready Steady. (7:30 p.m., Cafe Du Nord, 2170 Market)

Facebook just doesn't know how to get over you, it seems. Three years after tech sites called out the social network for keeping copies of deleted photos on their servers, Facebook is still having a hard time permanently deleting all the old photos its users trashed in the sober light of day. Facebook originally claimed that an old photo management system wasn't properly clearing out the deleted photography, and that they've been working to improve it, but according to Ars Technica's follow-up report today photos deleted as many as three years ago could still be floating around the back corners of the Internet.

Time to shed this grizzly winter of ours, yes? Oh wait, no. It has not been a glacial winter. Not at all. It has, in fact, been downright balmy this winter season of ours, full of shorts, sun, and getting high at your neighborhood park. While that doesn't exactly predict the best fall harvest season for our artisanal brethren up north, it does mean that we are more than ready for spring. And with that, you should consider checking out Passport to Dry Creek Valley.

Banana Sam, the squirrel monkey stolen from the San Francisco Zoo just before the new year, is finally ready to greet his legion of adoring this weekend. Sam, you'll remember, went missing and was believed to be stolen from the zoo on December 30th, only to turn up in Stern Grove nearby (allegedly, anyway). Now that Sam has had a month in rehab to shake off that terrible New Year's experience, the Zoo is throwing an "I Love Banana Sam" Weekend this Saturday and Sunday, and they would like all of us Samfans to shower him with Valentine wishes.

As we mentioned earlier, RuPaul's Drag Race is the show you should be watching. If you don't get Logo from your cable provider, then head over to Midnight Sun. Or any homosexual bar with a TV. You have no excuse now. Because the quality of the show is as excellent as any Breaking Games of Mad Men on a Throne and as viscerally appealing as an episode of Bad Girls Club Goes to Intervention. It is, in a word, art. Drag Race is that exquisite—and, unusually, it keep getting better. (Now in its fourth season, we predict Sharon Needles to slam the competition, past or present.) The only thing missing are appearances by San Francisco's notorious drag sect. So far not one queen from the Bay Area has competed on the show.

Gay marriage supporters and anyone with an ounce of common sense and normal human decency are expecting another major turning point in the fight to overturn Proposition 8 tomorrow morning. The decision on whether or not California's ban on same-sex marriages is legal under the U.S. Constitution will be made around 10 a.m. tomorrow morning when the Ninth Circuit Court is scheduled to release their decision. During earlier oral arguments, the LA Times reports, the three-judge panel "appeared to be leaning toward" siding with Judge Vaughn Walker's 2010 decision ruling Prop 8 unconstitutional.

In Monday's day-end roundup: observing leotarded men, the high cost of the Ed Lee biography, lawmaker scandal at Candlestick park, Bevan Dufty's new made up title, electronic skateboards take to the streets, and a new F-Market Streetcar.

Traffic is closed East Bound on Geary Boulevard between 29th & 31st Avenue until after 10:00 a.m. A PG&E vault fire (similar to this one in 2009) caused a widespread power outage. Please fine alternate routes to work or school or wherever today, folks.

In Tuesday's morning call: the New York Times examines the new East Span in great detail, a baby horned owl is welcomed to Golden Gate Park, a new job board for poachers, an Occupy Oakland documentary, seven bowls of ramen, and Snoop Dogg visits Ocean Beach (sort of).

The Ninth Circuit Court ruled today that, similar to a 2010 ruling by a lower court, Proposition 8, California's gay marriage ban, is unconstitutional. The panel of judges sided with Judge Vaughn Walker's 2010 decision pretty much saying the same thing, that same-sex marriage ban is wildly inappropriate. The voter-approved initiative, backed heavily by out-of-state funding, defined marriage in California as the union of a man and a woman.

A man was stabbed to death last night just before 7 p.m. in a Fifth Street homeless shelter run by the St. Vincent de Paul Society. An assailant fled the scene and remains and at large. The victim was pronounced dead at S.F. General.

As the only GOP presidential candidate without a glitter bombing to his name, Ron Paul probably should have seen the sparkling shower coming by now. As CityPages reports this morning, the Texas Congressman was caught off-guard Monday night when an activist by the name of "Charlie McAwesome" launched a colorful flurry upon the Texas Congressman after a campaign rally in downtown Minneapolis.

There are countless stories to tell in San Francisco, but sometimes a picture says so much more that mere words. Each Tuesday, we present to you 7 Reasons. (Our sister site LAist does the same thing, which we found too inspiring to resist.) Much like Photo du Jour highlighting a nifty image shot by our readers, 7 Reasons features recent photos from the SFist pool on Flickr showcasing the uniqueness of San Francisco. And with that, here are 7 reason why S.F. is, for lack of a better word, rad.

(by D. Hanousek) So, this week I'm writing from Portland, Oregon. I'm in the middle of a two-week offsite and I've been away from San Francisco for eight days. I was lucky enough to see my husband and kids in Tahoe over the weekend, but as I sit in my hotel room feeling homesick and watching First Week In, I realize that I have another confession to make: I Love San Francisco.

While the pundits, legal analysts, and holders of J.D.s pore over the 128 pages of text in the Ninth Circuit Court's decision this morning, we bring you our very favorite arguments for ruling Prop 8. unconstitutional. Presented by the Judges of the Ninth Circuit, in their own pop-culture referencing words:

In response to what they view as an unnecessarily violent response by the City of Oakland to Occupy protesters, the internet collective known as Anonymous struck out against Oakland officials today by posting their home phone numbers, addresses, and other personal information.

"Two Mops" by Brandon Doran.