See and be seen at these select San Francisco shows, parties, and events. You know, because you can't read the Internet all the time.

TUESDAY, MAY 12

THEATER CONVO: Carey Perloff, a passionate theater-lover and the artistic director of San Francisco's legendary American Conservatory Theater, will be in conversation with Mechanics’ Institute executive director Ralph Lewin. She'll discuss her book, Beautiful Chaos: A Life in the Theater. Mechanics' Institute,
57 Post Street, 6 p.m., $15

BURLESQUE BENEFIT: Since the Elbo Room won't be around forever, enjoy it while it lasts. Bombshell Betty is a class act, and the show is her and her burlesqueteers "put on the Ritz" with a Broadway themed show.647 Valencia Street, 9 p.m. $10

WEDNESDAY, MAY 13

READING: Emily Shultz will be talking about her new novel, The Blondes at City Lights. From the publisher, a quick summary of the plot "During a still hot autumn in New York City, a rabies-like illness spreads among blonde women, causing them to "rage out" and attack passersby." Stephen King, by the way, said that "Emily Schultz is my new hero." 261 Columbus Avenue, 7 p.m., Free

READING: Kenji Yoshino is Chief Justice Earl Warren Professor of Constitutional Law at NYU School of Law and he's got a cool-sounding book on marriage equality out which he'll discuss at Books Inc. in the Castro. Also, he's one of New York magazines' new Ethicists, which is now a podcast, and he's the best thing about it. 2275 Market Street, 7 p.m., Free

THURSDAY, MAY 14

BIKE TO WORK: It's bike to work day, people, this is not a drill! Pledge to ride here, and get involved by volunteering if you'd like! The organizer is the SF Bicycle Coalition and they're hoping to break records this year. Everywhere, all day, free

LECTURE: Described as “the Thoreau of the Beat Generation," Gary Snyder is a living legend. He's a poet, a Zen Buddhist, mountaineer, environment activist, and a Pulitzer Prize winner. He speaks at the Nourse for City Arts & Lectures. 275 Hayes Street, 7:30 p.m., $27

FRIDAY, MAY 15

SMITHS SING-ALONG: Mass karaoke at the Roxie wherein you realize that you are not truly alone, as everyone there will know all the heartbreaking, lonely lyrics to songs from the Smiths. And there is, of course, also a Morrissey look-alike contest. 3117 16th Street, 9:30 p.m., $12

SUPER CHEAP DRINKS: Have you been to The Basement, once known simply by its address, 222 Hyde, or as alternately as the "Rave Cave," which it sounds like it was? Well, $2 happy hour drinks from 6-8 (note that it's beer, wine and soju cocktails) and it's free to get in. It's every Friday, too so this is just one to have on your radar. 222 Hyde, 6 p.m., Free

SATURDAY, MAY 16

EXHIBIT: With probably cool temperatures this weekend, spend your day "stranded" on a tropical island where you learn about how to subsist! That's the theme of the new Conservatory of Flowers exhibit, and it sounds incredibly charming to me. "See examples of structures and tools—all created with a touch of castaway kitsch." To be clear, the exhibit lasts a while, but also, keep this one in your back pocket. 100 John F. Kennedy Drive, 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. $5-8

EXHIBIT: Mirus Gallery presents the first U.S. solo show from Berlin-based artist Clemens Behr. Called VARIETY OF (N)ONE, Behr has used materials gathered from an extensive remodel of the 540 Howard Street compound (also home to Temple Nightclub). Expect large-scale installations, sculpture, assemblage, collage, and new paintings created during a one-month residency at Mirus Gallery. 540 Howard Street, 6 p.m. to 10 p.m., Free

SUNDAY, MAY 17

BAY TO BREAKERS: Zappos dot com presents to you the annual, inimitable, inevitable, footrace slash party of the year. Est. 1912, it's evolved and devolved since then, and it needs to be experienced to be believed! It's sort of like Halloween, but straighter, most say. Course, 8 a.m., Registration for runners

GAY TO BREAKERS: That's how Daytime Realness at El Rio is billing itself. Not as the anti-Bay to Breakers, but as at least very far from Bay to Breakers physically. Also, it will be gayer. Lines for this are to be expected, so run over early! 3158 Mission Street, 2 p.m., $8, then $10 starting 3 p.m.