Human Placenta Deemed 'Ultimate Slow Food'

Placenta print by Buster Benson

Which: gross. We get it, people eat strange things. One time we saw Bear Grylls eat a sheep's eyeball just to survive in the Scottish Highlands and that didn't contain nearly as many magic powers nutrients as a human placenta. Point is, we don't judge anyone for their weird food rituals, just the gross fetishization of said foods. And apparently "local placenta aficionados" have all manner of things to do with their (ahem) "homegrown organ meat."

Daniel Patterson, celebrated chef at Coi, for example, taught a cooking class at SFMOMA where he made a bolognese sauce from his wife's afterbirth. The San Francisco Food Adventure Club held a human placenta rumaki tasting for members. Another local mom had her midwife bring over a food dehydrator, which she used to make a sort of placenta jerky out of afterbirth seasoned with jalapeño and lemon. ("It was spongy. It tasted like chicken or seitan.") Others are turning it in to teas and tinctures and pills which are said to do wonders for fighting off postpartum depression. So, basically, it's only a matter of time before Humphry Slocombe offers to stir up a couple pints "Placenta Breakfast" ice cream or a Maternity Ward-themed cocktail bar pops up and starts shaking it in to martinis.

Anyhow, interested parties and expectant mothers looking for a few afterbirth options would do well to give it a read. Don't miss the DIY section.