Korbel Family Scandal Settled "Throughout the Universe"

korbel-family-scandal.jpg We hope you've been keeping up with the crazy family rape-and-money scandal going on between Korbel Champagne Cellars owner Gary Heck and his 39-year-old daughter Richie Ann Samii. They just settled in court for an undisclosed sum (after she'd been seeking tens of millions), ending a long and heated battle over insurance money, trust funds, and other inherited wealth that Richie Ann thought she was being denied. Court documents refer to the father and daughter dropping all claims against each other "from the beginning of time" and "throughout the universe" -- language we're guessing the daughter came up with to be dramatic.

This all goes back to a sex scandal in which Richie Ann and her husband Chris Samii were accused of raping two 23-year-old female winery employees beside the estate's champagne-bottle-shaped pool one night after work. Richie Ann claims this was a totally consensual orgy, but her father freaked out and kicked her off the compound. She also got fired from her official duties taking care of the estate's menagerie of animals, which includes two zebras. Criminal charges were dropped but Richie Ann never stopped protesting the millions of dollars she claimed she was getting screwed out of.

Anyhow, she now wants nothing whatsoever to do with her father, ever, and it sounds like the feeling's mutual. With her newfound independent wealth, the Samiis are now free to lead their pansexual lives in peace, presumably somewhere outside Sonoma County.

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Huh, when I was funding my New Year's Eve libations, I was also funding rape? Settlements tinged w/ rape allegations? I was funding something. Maybe just my hangover.

"from the beginning of time" and "throughout the universe" -- language we're guessing the daughter came up with to be dramatic.


Nah, that's just some boilerplate language lawyers have developed to be dramatic.

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"Lawyerese Goes Galactic as Contracts Try to Master the Universe"

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB125658217507308619.html

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