Bomb Parts Successfully Smuggled Into 10 Federal Office Buildings

Terrific news, everyone! CNN has obtained a copy of a report being delivered to Congress this morning detailing how undercover agents managed to sneak bomb-making components into ten "Level IV" federal office buildings in four different, unnamed U.S. cities (including, quite possibly, our own). The agents then went ahead and assembled the bombs in restrooms and trotted about the buildings' offices with the improvised devices in their briefcases, unbeknownst to all concerned.

This was all an effort by the Government Accountability Office to call out the Federal Protective Service, or FPS, which has been known to be an ill-managed agency with poorly trained security staff. The kicker: the report includes a photo of a federal guard asleep at his post, and another incident of a guard who accidentally sent an infant in a carrier through an x-ray machine when he wasn't paying attention. Awesome job!