July 25, 2008
Hipster Bingo: SF Edition?
The incomprehensible web-log Hipster Runoff went and reblogged an Alt Bingo card, and then tweaked and reposted an improved version -- but it still doesn't feel quite right, at least not for San Francisco's special hipster needs.
For one thing, we've got so many azns in this city that it's kind of cheating to even put them on the card. And although we long to see a rcrd hat in the wild, it's never actually happened. And alt bros start to smear into fggts after they've been here a few months, so they don't deserve two different boxes.
So what would you abort/retry/ignore for an SF hipster bingo card? A bag from Bi-Rite Creamery? One of those big old-fashioned bike hlmts? Tumblr? Knitting a hat in Dolores Park? Striped shoes? Corgis? Walnuts? Seriously, we have no idea. You tell us.
Just think back to your last trip down Valencia and start listing accessories. (Or flip through some of Vice Magazine's nots from a year and a half ago.) We'll compile the best comments onto an SF-localized card. Yay bingo!
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No fixies or vegan sausage?
And wide, non-functional belts.
And skinny jeans.
"Nigsters"? Ugh. I'm hardly the most easily offended person, esp. in this fucking town, but ugh.
I'd always heard of black hipsters referred to as 'blipsters.' It's way more adorable.
"Nigsters"? Ugh. I'm hardly the most easily offended person, esp. in this fucking town, but ugh.
They've changed it to "Blipsters" on the linked site.
I would replace Sparks with PBR, and the Burning Man logo should be on there (often spotted in necklace, sticker, or tattoo form).
Joel - double ugh.
UGH. UGH.
It's only "incomprehensible" to people who have the sense of humor of the unfunniest blog on the internet (SFist).
Unfunniest blog (SFist)? Is that joaking? I don't get it. Explain please
Hmmm. Maybe Chrome bags? And yes, fixies. Also weird facial hair.
Smoking outside the Transfer-ers. Don't have a cute name for them though. And where's the catagory for hipsters with kids? Surely their runts get a monika. Wait. Just thought of a name for Marina hipsters–Jonas Brothers.
Moccasin boots, feathers, gold headbands and dream catchers...at least this week.
Also, SF hipster bingo card could possibly be complete without the proverbial purple American Apparel hoodie either.
Wayfarers
What I meant to type above was "No" SF hipster bingo card could possibly be complete without....
horizontal stripes
@ charlesporch.
Yes, good call on the moccasins. Those things are everywhere.
"incomprehensible" is right. nothing to do with humor. it's just impossible to read (Kanye).
Burning Man is far too pre-hipster for any association. That's a world of Mad Max douche all its own. Such distinctions have to be made or these cultural references don't mean anything. Would you really call the Hunter Thompson wannabe guy with the tribal face paint a hipster? Of course not. The fixie reference was there in the form of an annoyingly neon wheel, but it disappeared. For SF, surely a reference to art school would be necessary. The wolf shirt is a nice, subtle touch. But where are the flat-billed, over-sized sports caps for the dudes? Comically large jewelry for the ladies?
I hated it the first time I saw it, too. So many grammatical errors! But it took about 10 minutes to get into the writing style, and now it's one of the funniest sites in my RSS reader.
Corgis are hip. Sweet. But where is the 20-something crap-spewing "activist" who will be moving back to Jersey when it is time to get married and have kids?
That is quite possibly the worst site I've ever seen. I don't even care if the excessive misspelling is supposed to be cute. It's a total hispter-ironic overload where it doesn't just come back around, but actually circles a couple of times before being just as vapid, style-obsessed, and interested in using fake words as any issue of Cosmo.
They had hipsters (or hipster like substances) back in the nineties when burning man was new. More raver blinkies, fewer fixies.
How sad...you people really have nothing better to do?
Make fun all you want, come up with your own strict rules and regulations about what is ok and not ok to wear, what makes a hipster, etc., but no matter what- you are the people actually wasting your lives, on the internet, talking shit about what people wear. How pathetic. But hey at least you aren't hipsters! You are just losers that hide behind your computers talking shit...quite the lives you are leading!
the ubiquity of American Apparel is totally baffling to me; i don't get it at all. one of the core values of hipsterdom is the avoidance of current, mass-produced commodities specifically targeted to the early-20's "hip" demographic? (excepting, of course, ironic appreciation.)
moreover, aren't these are the same people who - time again again, generation after generation - use the term "uniform" to make fun of frat/sorority fashion homogeny (Abercrombie, etc)?
same diff.
"you are the people actually wasting your lives, on the internet, talking shit about what people wear."
that's going on my headstone.
I want a Sunset bingo card--the free spot will be a pink plastic bag. We can have spots for those "The Sunset/The City" hoodies, a drunken Irishman, a scrawny Chinese Wanksta kid with a scowl, a bubble-tea place, a lost tourist, the N Judah, and to make it extra hard, a Mission hipster. Or maybe during June and July, the sun.
w77 sez:
How sad...you people really have nothing better to do?
Make fun all you want, come up with your own strict rules and regulations about what is ok and not ok to wear, what makes a hipster, etc., but no matter what- you are the people actually wasting your lives, on the internet, talking shit about what people wear. How pathetic. But hey at least you aren't hipsters! You are just losers that hide behind your computers talking shit...quite the lives you are leading!
I am pretty much a card-carrying member of hipster nation, my friend, and I reserve the right to mock anything and everything*, including my own hipsterness. As for you, do you really have nothing better to do than get offended by anonymous comments on the intarwebz?
(*except Finns. Don't ever mock a Finn, they get stabby.)
"Art car."
@11: Dream catchers are in with hipsters?
Man, those stupid fucking things have been around forever.
> I want a Sunset bingo card--the free spot will be a pink plastic bag.
FLAWLESS VICTORY.
> Or maybe during June and July, the sun.
No, not that. Too unrealistic.
Other Sunset items:
A ticketed car. SFSU student.
w77 just discovered that not everyone thinks he is as cool as he had hoped. Just had to open his mouth and cement the dufus stereotype.
Oh w77, that's so adorable! How old are you? Sooooooo cute.
Sorry if I struck a nerve people...just trying to point out there are better things to worry about.
"Oh w77, that's so adorable! How old are you? Sooooooo cute."
Zing, you got me on the internet! Oh man! Good one! How DUMB it is of me to NOT concern myself with hipster fashion and to wish people would do something more with their time! I wish I could be part of the bored cynical vapid club found here!
i'd just like to point out that w77 posted at 11:17, then came back at 2:58 to see if anyone had responded to what he/she wrote.
bored cynical vapid club is my favorite new band. i hear the hipsters call it BCVC.
As a neutral party re: hipsters, you're kind of flailing here, w77. Best to just walk away.
Is it a sign that I'm old that I don't get half the hipster references? And I used to live in the Mission. On the other hand, the writing is so annoying on the thing that it's hard to tell if I know what they're talking about or not.
I used to be with it, then they changed what it was. Now what was it isn't it, and what is it is weird and scary to me.
It'll happen to you too.
KatyG, the problem is that it was never it and in their increasing desire to make it it they have become caricatures of it.
KatyG, the problem is that it was never it and in their increasing desire to make it it they have become caricatures of it.
ooohh.. lose two points for not recognizing a simpsons reference -- and lose another two for taking it seriously. Gain 23 (shoot the moon!) if you don't know any simpsons references because the simpsons has gone to shit or because you're eurotrash.
as for that bingo -- they're not actually trying to imply that it's a satire of SF hipsters, are they? it's filled up with LA bullshit (just like LA! AH HA HA HA HA HA ZIIIING). Steve Aoki? Party Photographers? Celebrity whores? nigster, please...