Blocker: 2700 San Bruno

Exploring San Francisco through the lens of city blocks, Blocker is a regular series by Charles Hodgkins. Look for it on SFist every other Wednesday, around the lunching hour.

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Blocker, No. 39: San Bruno Ave. in Portola

Good grief. You’re really struggling getting your luxury SUV into that space in front of Tena Pro Nails, aren’t you? Do you have an 11 A.M. pedicure appointment? It’s a few minutes after the hour...

Upon quick glance, Portola’s main business drag, San Bruno Avenue, seems acutely workaday compared to a few of its neighborhood-cousins around town. If Russian Hill is a cute little summer dress and the Mission is an old Air Supply T-shirt worn tightly and ironically, Portola is a pair of blue Levi’s—straight-leg ones. And the hair looks terrific.

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Abutted by an elevated freeway and devoid of restaurants, parks, and other businesses that would make it any sort of destination area, Portola is one of the most ethnically mixed neighborhoods in town. (It’s also fiercely working-class, parallel parking-resistant luxury SUVs notwithstanding.) Much is made of San Francisco’s diversity, but there are few local districts that can compete with Portola’s equally strong populations of Latinos, blacks, whites, and Asians. Apart from simply walking the sidewalks, look no further than the hair salons on San Bruno between Bacon and Wayland: T.G.I.F. Beauty Supply at 2714, advertising “100% Fine Human Hair”; Giannini’s Barber Shop at 2732, where men in bright and flowery shirts cut hair and talk sports at cut-rate prices; and, a couple of salons aimed directly at Portola’s sizable 40-and-up Asian demographic.

Come on, ma’am. It can’t be that hard to wedge your SUV between that black Honda behind you and...well, there’s no car in front of you. It’s been a couple minutes now...

The greening of San Bruno Avenue is afoot, and not a year too soon. As we wander toward Wayland—past two- and three-story apartment buildings, scattered single-family homes, and outpost no. 5731 of the carpet-bombing Quickly chain—the number of wispy plantings increases along the east sidewalk, as do the shiny and new black-painted light posts. These contemporary touches help make the block a bit less dowdy-looking, particularly on this archetypal grey late spring San Francisco day.

One autumn and winter-loving resident, however, adamantly refuses to acknowledge that the current month is not one that ends in “ber”: The balcony of one apartment at 2725-2727 San Bruno remains festooned with tiny little plastic jack-o-lanterns, Xmas lights, and a remarkably hardy wreath. All that’s missing is a cardboard cutout of a turkey in pilgrims’ clothing.

Another element that sets Portola apart from other San Francisco neighborhoods: The likelihood of spotting a snarly (and possibly hirsute) male behind the wheel of a rumbling old ‘60s Charger or ’70s Fury. Regardless of where we all stand on this issue, we can surely agree that these vaguely Bullitt-throwback moments are not nearly as common in Laurel Heights, West Portal, or along the Northeast Waterfront.

Nicely done, ma’am.