May 7, 2008
SFist Tonight

While we're being asked by security to leave the premises at tonight's SFIFF Golden Gate Awards Party--we hear it's open-bar--check out one of these thrilling events happening tonight. Who knows? Maybe we'll run into you, post-ejection.
COMEDY: Chad Leherman (of Last Comic Standing) and Justin Lamb (from SPF7) kick off a weekly night of stand-up chortling over at the historic Purple Onion with Something People Like. Breaking the comedy series' hymen is headliner Kevin Camia and San Jose band the Albert Square.
8 p.m. // Purple Onion (140 Columbus) // $8
FILM: "You damn dirty apes," famously growls Charleston Heston (RIP) in tonight's brand new 35mm print screening of the original Planet of the Apes (1968).
7 p.m., 9:15 p.m. // Castro Theatre (Castro & Market) // $6-$9
MUSIC: Hip hop, "progressive style," and indie-rock sounds abound tonight when Subtle, Facing New York, and Clue to Kalo take the stage. (For more details, Oscar Pascual has more info on the concert than we could possible give you.)
9 p.m. // Great American Music Hall (859 O'Farrell ) // $15


I saw something yesterday that just blew my mind.
I was walking down 14th Street approaching Church Street in San Francisco. There's a restaurant right there called Home, and on the 14th street wall of the restaraunt there is a bus shelter. The smelliest homeless man I've ever encountered lives in that shelter. If you are closer than half a block from him you can smell his putrid/rancid/fecal stench in your nostrils, punching you in the face. His overwhelming stench has resulted in many a half block of held breaths.
Anyway, yesterday morning on the way to the subway I was walking past the bus stop and there was prince charming, like every morning, sleeping by sitting on the bus stop's colapsable mini seat, head resting on the handle of his shopping cart, a sheet covering him and part of his shopping cart. The sheet did not go all the way to the ground though, his legs were visible from the shin down... and it was raining/pouring, urine underneath him, as though some magical urine cloud had a micro cell burst underneath his blanket.
The urine at first pooled and then began to make a rushing stream down the sidewalk for several yards before it's diagnal path finally put it over the edge into the gutter.
San Francisco.
I'm friends with the band The Albert Square. They rock. It will be a fantastic show with hotties galore (myself included).