May 1, 2008
Zito Demoted, Gargantuan Salary Still Intact
By Joe Kukura
It seemed like such a great idea prior to last season – take the best free agent leftie out there, and sign him to the biggest contract ever for a pitcher ("TWO Barrys! What could possibly go wrong?"). But the Giants' Barry Zito is currently 0-6 with a 7.83 ERA, and opposing batters have been scoring like drunks on Capp Street with a pocketful of hundred dollar bills. Now Barry’s been yanked from the starting rotation and will instead serve as $126 million middle reliever.
That’s right -- $126 million for a guy who now occupies one of the more useless spots on your pitching staff. That's like buying a brand new custom Rolls-Royce, then gluing Happy Meal toys all over it and taking it to Burning Man for a week. That’s like Danielle Steele buying you a pair of shoes, and you taking them to Crossroads to see if you can get eight bucks for them. That’s like taking your most brilliant, articulate City Supervisor and sticking him on the Green Party ticket with Ralph Nade – oh… yeah, right.
Plenty of people are wondering aloud if this was the single worst free agent signing in the history of organized baseball. Is it? Or should he just borrow Lincecum's lucky beads?
Image: Wikicommons
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Well, this post probably a couple days late and I've commented about this topic a fair amount elsewhere, but suffice it to say that there wasn't much the Giants could do.
Due to his stature and contract, Barry has to accept reassignment to the minors; he cannot be sent there against his wishes. Due to the nature of major league contracts, the Giants can't just cut him (I think something like 90% of his salary is guaranteed). And with his current performance, no team is crazy enough to trade for him.
I hope this works out for Barry, otherwise it's going to be years before the Giants are free of this money pit.
Every time I order an $8:00 beer at the park, I will make a silent toast to Barry.
every time I smuggle a quart plastic bag filled with vodka into the ballpark, I shall make a silent toast to Barry.
Every time I pay for an overpriced shot of below average tasting whiskey, I shall say "I just got Zitoed."
Every time I fail to renew my FSN Bay Area package, I will make a silent toast to Barry.
Every time my posts get five or more comments, I touch myself.
Every time he plots out the future of the Oakland A's, Billy Beane will toast to Brian Sabean's baseball acumen.
I can't believe the MLB hasn't changed their rules about contracts and guaranteed player salary. They should be modeled after NFL salaries with Guaranteed + Bonuses and severance clauses so that teams don't end up wasting $100million on worthless players.
hey hilary's~~~
great gawddamned idea! i usually just smuggle in two big beers but i'm always paranoid of clinking bottles or possible accidental crash spillage along the way. i am a fan of the ziploc in so many other situations, and now this new one! this post was like a hint from heloise!
i refuse to get zitoed for an $8 beer. refuse.
~~~gogo
gogobooty:glad I could be of help. $5.50 for a lemonade (hint: extra ice)is still a bit steep, but OH how refreshing.
hilary's~~~
in my picnic cooler i usually bring my own juice beverages in plastic rubbermaid bottles, like kids use in lunchboxes. no one has ever told me it was not ok. i've brought a ziploc bag of ice to "keep food cold" & no one said boo. i did have to leave behind a can of soda.
i am willing to pay for my ticket and that's it. (free tickets are best.) i pack a lunch or snacks every time i go. it's a like a personal challenge to spend as little as possible. i scar too easily to withstand all that ballgame gouging.
cheers
~~~gogo