April 15, 2008
Cab Ride from Hell
Although we are occasional cab riders -- this is San Francisco, after all, not NYC -- we have nothing but mediocre cab experiences. Never horrible, never exceptional (except for one nice cab driver who knew the nearest cross street of every address we gave him -- awesome!!). That's what makes this tale from Mission Mission so incredible.
In a story recounted to the site, a woman called a cab from Kilowatt to take her back to (presumably) her apartment. The woman was severely drunk, but the cabbie threw her out of his cab -- literally, as the woman says she has bruises and was bleeding -- and took off with her wallet and cell phone in the car. She later recovered the wallet, minus $100 and her Muni pass.
Although it is stressed that this story could possibly be just that -- a story -- it got us wondering: does anyone have any bad cabbie stories? Or, any good ones? Leave your ire/love of the yellow taxis in the comments jar.
photo by IJsendoorn.
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I was on an all day first date with some crazy Australian chick. We went for lunch at Pier 23, got loaded then played pool at some dive in NB. And well, got more loaded. So we grabbed a cab to get her home safely *wink* and started making out along the way. She pulls off her top baring her more than ample womanly assets and the turban wearing cabbie goes ballistic on us yelling at us to get out. Luckily we were close to her place and all was well in the universe.
Oh wait, we were being drunk idiots, not him. It was a memorable cab ride tho'
coke selling brazilian driver doing his best to get us from the dubliner in noe valley to some sushi place in the marina in 7 minutes, he was flying over streets, and my 8 month pregnant friend peed herself, (I think I might have too though),
No booze or sex, but....
Get in a cab at the corner of Haight and Ashbury with 3 hours before an international flight and ask to be taken to SFO.
The (turbaned) driver did not know where the airport was or how to get there.
I have pros and cons on cabs/cabbies-
It really bugs me that so many of the cabbies are on drugs.. Especially when the entire point of taking a cab in some instances is to avoid drunk driving... what's worse? Your friend all boozed up, or some coked up cabbie?
However, a good friend of mine 'drives cab' and he's a great driver. Personable, knows how to get anywhere.. and you know.. not on drugs... not while driving his cab anyway.
redseca2, was it necessary to point out that the driver was wearing a turban?
I haven't had any horrible experiences but do get annoyed when I'm taken the long way home. Once going from downtown to Oak and Stanyan the cabbie tried to take me down Haight instead of Fell. After a couple blocks I asked him to please take me down the street without all the stop signs.
Cabbies and bike are not friends.
But the good thing about riding a bike is you never need to use those guys. But on the other hand you might get a coked out cabbie trying to clip you going down Oak at 80mph.
Looking for the positive side - the woman wasn't too badly hurt and this incident may encourage her to deal with her drinking problem.
Cabbing from Cole Valley to 5th and Townsend, driver wants to take the freeway at 8:30am. Um, no? I politely asked to go the normal way and was rebuffed with a bunch of truly foul cursing and a road-raged drive through SOMA to my office.
Highlights: 60mph down Brannan, narrowly hitting a pedestrian, 2 red light runs.
Thankfully, I called the cab's management co. and enjoyed the unsurprised tone of the GM when I reported the cab's number. I think it might've been that guy's last day on the road.
I haven't had any bad experiences while IN a cab, but I've had plenty of harrowing experiences while near one -- both in cars and on foot.
Can we please have mandatory drug testing for cab drivers?
kimmi wrote:
redseca2, was it necessary to point out that the driver was wearing a turban?
Yes, because if the equivalent happened in Mumbai and the Marlboro Man taxi driver was wearing a cowboy hat you would have wanted me to include that detail.
I utilize cabs in SF way more than I should - prolly 5 to 6 times a week. It's a waste of American dollars, but considering the horrors of Muni (e.g, never on time, packed to the gills, annoying fat boys stalking unsuspecting passengers and taking secret snapshots for immoral purposes, etc.), the benefits often outweigh the costs. One time, really late for work, I hopped into Alec "Grasshopper" Kaplan's "cab." He appeared to be living in the vehicle as it was filthy, full of dirty underwear and discarded food wrappers. Plus, I'm not sure he had a taxi medallion, but whatever, I was in a hurry.
Anyway, I asked him a couple questions about his mayoral campaign and dude started ranting on and on and on about all these conspiracies directed at him by Gruesome Newsom, the Sheriff's Department, assorted Aliotos, etc. As he's ranting he's getting more and more excited, skipping curves, and squealing around corners. I'm a fairly big, angry looking man who's not easily intimidated, but this guy was starting to freak me out a bit.
All the same, it was an adventure of sorts, kind of like visiting the 24 Hour Church of Elvis on wheels or something. I'd suggest you all take a ride in his cab at least once (soon as he gets out of prison, of course).
btw, not owning a car in SF requires that I have Yellow Cab on speed dial - not that it takes all that much effort to keep smacking the "3" button until somebody picks up the phone. The majority of the cabbies have been pretty cool except this Russian/Czech guy who tried to cop an attitude with me for telling him the route I wanted to take instead of his "tourist route." As per usual, this customer was right.
The guy for Luxor in the little English type cab is a real nice guy too. Very personable and knowledgeable about the history of his car. I think he mentioned that he was part owner of the actual vehicle.
I mostly haven't had any memorable horror stories while in a cab, but I suspect that's largely because San Francisco has maybe 50 taxi medallions, tops.
I can't remember the last saturday night that I was on hold with Yellow Cab for less than 30 minutes (when I could get through at all: the "all circuits are busy" error and I are old friends at this point), and once I actually get this dispatcher, "we'll be right there" ends up indicating a span of time not less than 15 minutes and not to exceed the heat-death of the universe. And Yellow is, as far as I can tell, the best of the available options: DeSoto and the rest are just useless.
In return for all of this aggravation, I get to enjoy the single most expensive taxi service in the country. Yay.
i grabbed a cab downtown like near market and montgomery, and we were heading up market towards noe..the driver was pretty aggro, yelling at other cars, generally seemed like he was in a hurry and convinced that he know what was going on more than any of the other folks on the road. generally i like a driver who takes his business seriously because i know he isn't going to dilly dally but this got seemed really angry too..
we get sort of tangled up with an F line that is chugging along just as sirens start going off, and so he drops into the left lane and then back in front of it in an effort to get out of the way of an ambulance that is coming in the right lane..i guess he was trying to create a lane for the ambulance but of course there's like tons of other cars and the muni train stuck there too and none of them were clued in to his master plan.. it wasn't really clear to me what he was trying to accomplish either..
we ended up rolling about halfway across the interesection where 101 freeway turns into ocatavia, against the red light. cars going hell of fast, looked like maybe 50+mph zoom by in front and behind of us at full speed, horns blaring, two of them skid sideways to get out of the way, and one flies off the road behind us in an attempt to not broadside us. then the light changes and he peels out without even stopping to see what happened, i am pretty sure at least one of the other cars hit something. it was very lucky that we weren't spun and smashed both ways. my heart was pounding about 500 beats a minute and my skin got all tingly and prickly from the adrenaline rush, i was sure that i was gonna die that evening. to be fair the guy did kind of chill out after that.
anyway i always wear a seatbelt now in cabs.
I dont even bother calling the numbers any longer...90% of the time the line just keeps ringing forever and the other 10% the cab doesnt show up, so I just stand and wait like an idiot.
Try waiting for a cab at 10th and Irving at 8pm on a Thursday. Its completely impossible...the only good part is that if you want long enough it will eventually be Friday and you can grab the cab of someone coming into the hood for dinner.
Geez that sounds great!
When I can get a cab to stop for me, I usually wish they would drive faster!
Towncars though, those are the best, they do not care what goes on in the back, the seats are comfy, and the fare is all inclusive.
Anybody ever had the true pleasure of Disco Taxi??? Disco ball, lots of blinking lights - a trip!! It's been a year or so since I've rode with him (his name is Haydar & he's w/Desoto as I recall)
One time I took a cab to visit my friend in the hospital. I guess my phone fell out of my pocket, I didn't realize it was missing till i got up to my friends room. I tried calling it to see if maybe the cab driver could bring it back (yeah right)and i got my voice mail saying I was on the other line. I canceled the service right away...who knows where he was calling to.
My friends have much better stories: an unmarked cab driver scoring blow for another passenger because they used to be a cop, a limo driver that "puff puff passed" while driving. My stories are lackluster...
WORST:
1. NYE 2007, took 2+ hours in the freezing cold to get a cab from the Castro. We were so thankful, and then he pulled over to step out and pee in the street. Kinda gross.
2. A very friendly cab driver... until he started going off on a racist rant. There went my buzz.
BEST: A female cab driver saying that getting an airport fare was like an orgasm. TMI, but hilarious.
Nothing particularly bad (other calling twice and waiting over 1.5hrs for a cab around 2am one Sat. night in Noe Valley, but that's normal unfortunately), but in going to the Greyhound station I did get a cabbie who was definitely smoking the wacky tabacky just before he pulled up. Unsuprisingly, he was very chill, rather friendly and interesting to talk to (and luckily he drove normally).
Worst: The guy that tried to renegotiate his mortgage while doing what felt like 60mph down Turk Street. When I got out, I kissed the pavement. (A poor idea on my part.)
Best/Worst: The driver that accepted a late night challenge to drag race on Guerrero.
Best: Driver (I think his name was Paul?) that picked us up after a Giants game and reminisced about watching Willie Mays at Seals Stadium.
imagine if you had to drive drunk annoying people around all day for measly $...i bet you'd drive fast too and kick people out of your car who were naked, i would.
CABBIES HATE MY NEIGHBORHOOD
Seriously, if I wind up needing to take a cab back from the Mission, Embarcadero and or any busy neighborhood I can almost guarantee that a cabbie will either ask me to find another cab or bitch about all the way back.
Oh and for the Record the neighborhood is the Dogpatch.
it's probably been 5 years ago, but my car was totalled by a cabbie coming away from the curb- he peeled a u-turn with no warning from the middle of the stretch of road we were on...in the middle of the afternoon, in regular traffic. i got out of the car and started dialing the police...at least 5 other cabbies had pulled over and gathered around to harass me before the call even went through.
to make things worse, i was youg, stupid, very poor (well i prefer to think of myself as a brash little survivor, doing what i had to do to make it...=) and, um...uninsured (hence the call to the police on my part- i'm brash but not *really* stupid.) so i was too freaked out, inexperienced, and guilt ridden to deal with the legal process or the cab co...and i never got any payments for my car. instead i spent a ton of money on tickets (duh), insurance (duh), and repairs to get the car drivable again. it was still hideously crashed up until about 2 years ago when i sold it and moved- car free- to sf.
so, yeah, now i'm at the mercy of the muni and the cabbies...oh brother...
I've had pretty good experience with cabbies in San Francisco.
I also never get into a taxi without noting the cab number and the driver's badge number. I ask to see it before takeoff.
I've had occasion when a driver has refused to take me. No problem, the SFPD taxi detail number is saved in my cell.
I never rely on the taxi to be my ambulance, that is, I don't get so fucked up during a night on the town that I MUST have a cab to get home.
Be aware, there are lots of assholes driving cabs. And there are even more riding them.
I miss the Night Cabbie column in the SF Gate. What ever happened to that guy? Did he go back to being a stock broker, or perhaps a lawyer?
-Humbert
Two coworkers and I got a cab at the airport on one of those rainy/sunny April days, road wet and slick, and this guy used the brake pedal like and on-off switch. Practically sideswiped several cars. The meter said $20 exactly. One bill, so convenient!
Why does every cab driver in this city suck? I can't remember the last time I had to explain how to get from a bar downtown to my house (downtown) five or more times before being taken the wrong way.
"Oh, oh, sorry, I didn't know O'Farrell was one way. What? I'm going the wrong way? Wait, Market is south of O'Farrell?"
Fuuuuuck thaaaat.
I've never had a bad experience riding in a taxi. All my bad experiences have been getting hit by taxis while I'm walking through crosswalks.
When I'm in a cab, I enjoy talking to the drivers. I generally get real chatty cabbies. Here's an exchange that took place on Christmas Day two years ago, around 12:30PM.
Cab Driver: You first person I ever pick up on Castro Street.
Me: Oh really? I get picked-up on Castro Street all the time
Lame joke falls flat.
Driver: I work from 4AM. No one around. I could pull off me shirt, pants, underwears, run around in street and no one would see, it so dead.
Me: Wow, that'd be (frightful) sight. Um, how long have you been driving in SF?
Cab Driver: Three month. Here three month.
Me: Oh, where are you from?
Cab Driver: Brazil.
Me: Nice country.
Brazilian Cab Driver: Lemme ask you: what American's do on Christmas?
Me: Well generally speaking, children wake up on Christmas morning to find presents under their Christmas tree and their stockings filled with gifts brought from Santa Claus. Of course this is just a ruse propagated by parents and popular culture. There is no Santa Claus.
Cab Driver: Oh.
Me: Traditionally there's also a large meal that's shared with family and sometimes friends.
Cab Driver: What American's eat?
Me: Often ham or turkey-- or both ham and turkey. And sides like salads, stuffings, vegetables, breads, you know-- that kind of stuff. How about in Brazil?
Cab Driver: Oh we have a big Bar-b-que. Everyone comes. So no Americans eat pig? Pork?
Me: Ham is pork.
Cab Driver: Oh? This I not know.
Me: So do you guys roast the pig in the ground?
Cab Driver: Yeah, we take it's insides out and put them aside. And we rub it with red pepper, um... black pepper, um... white pepper. Then we cook it in pit in ground.
Me: Sounds yummy.
Cab Driver: Lots of people come. Drink beers, listen to music, dance.
Holds up a large energy drink can
Aye, this not working.
Me: Oh, you don't have any energy?
Cab Driver: No, lots of energy. Just working since 4AM. So lemme ask you, is it true American men only have 'ex once a month?
Me: What?
Cab Driver: I should not be asking. But, 'ex once a month? I have American woman friend. She tell me she and American husband only have 'ex once a month?
Me: Oh, sex. Sex? Sex once a month? Hmm, well yeah that's probably true if they're married.
Cab Driver: Ohhhhh. If I only have 'ex once a month I kill myself. I kill myself.
Me: How about in Brazil?
Cab Driver: Oh man, we have 'ex four or five time a day.
Me: Really?
Cab Driver: Yes. My girlfriend come over she talk to me and...
he punches a fist into an open palm
Then a little later she puts her head on my lap and...
he punches a fist into an open palm
Then maybe her parents are gone and...
he punches a fist into an open palm
Me: No wonder Brazilians have a lot of kids! Probably explains why a Brazilian wax is so popular. Easier to get outta the gates.
Lame joke falls flat
Cab Driver: Another American friend says she and her boyfriend go to club to watch other people ah-fuckin' so she and boyfriend can get turned on. You ever heard of such a thing?
Me: Oh yeah.
Cab Driver: They go to Power... Power?
Me: Power Exchange
Cab Driver: Yeah, you know it?
Me: Know of it, but I've never been.
Cab Driver: I never heard of such a thing in my life. We don't have in Brazil.
Me: That's because you're already too busy--
I punch a fist into an open palm
Cab Driver: That true. That true.
Most of my memorable experiences with cabs have been been of the "nearly hit by one" variety. They drive like maniacs.
Thanksgiving a few years ago, I'm on my way to a friends. The cabbie picks us up and says there is something wrong with his engine, so he can't stop too much. What followed was a scene out of "Bullitt." Flying over hills airborne, screeching around corners at full speed. It was awesome, great fun (a little hair raising). He got an extra big tip.
On my way to a vet appointment with my sick dog, the MUNI bus driver suddenly pulls his bus over to the side of the Embarcadero and says "this is it." Gets out, walks away.
A cabbie kindly stops and takes me and my dog (his head sticking out the back window -- he loves that) and got me to the vet in time for our appointment. That was good.
A cab driver kicked me and a couple friends out of his cab because he said our swearing offended him. He suddenly pulled over on Van Ness and started screaming that we were stupid and had foul mouths or something like that. Kicked us right out of the cab where we were. 2 in the morning and stranded on Van Ness. GREAT.
@ idyll23
I live in the Dogpatch too. I never tell them until I'm in and I'm too damned big to throw out. But (if it's a weekend night) I always promise them they'll pick up a fare within a block of my place and they always do.
My only memorable cab story is getting taken for a ride through a 15th St. construction zone while the driver jabbered away on his bluetooth headset. But when I told him "Hey could we just take 16th? My kid is being put in an ambulance and I want to get there to ride in with him." the guy's eyes locked onto mine in the mirror and we closed the 10 block gap in a minute and a half.
@icbalaam, brilliant, give us more......
you can't really blame a cabbie who doesn't want to go to dogpatch. nothing there, nothing really in the vicinity and, in the end, a waste of gas and time more than anything else.
and honestly, can we call 'dogpatch' what it really is, east potrero? calling a rather dismal area by a new name (who thought dogpatch sounded good?) does not make it somehow more hip or popular to live there.
@ thedroog: dogpatch has been named such since the 1890s.
It's 3a.m. after clubbing south of market I walked in freezing cold up to Market. I'm standing in front of the BofA at Van Ness and decide I can't take it any more and hail a cab. There's one at the signal and he's got a green light but he's just sitting there while I wave in desperation for fear of someone else getting the only available cab I've seen in 20 minutes.
Finally the driver pulls through the intersection and picks me up. Happy to be warm again, I tell him where I want to go and he takes off. At first I didn't notice his erratic driving because, well, cab drivers drive the way they drive and who am I to criticize. I just want to get home quickly. It wasn't until we're driving down one of the one lane, one-way streets around Guerrero that I get the shock of my life. I'm glazing out the window when the driver suddenly side-swipes four cars and sheers off their rear-view mirrors. Crap! And he's over-correcting and nearly swipes the cars on the left. But I'm stunned at not sure what to do, I'm nearly home and don't feel like doing a barrel-roll to escape, so I wait it out expecting he just dozed. Oh no, I wish it were that. I casually say something to the guy and he tries to respond, but he garbles as his head is a-bobbin around like a newborn. He's completely shit-faced. A few more white-knuckle blocks of swerving and a couple red lights run and I'm home, fortunately alive. I pay the guy, get out and immediately call the cops and then the cab dispatch. "Get this bastard off the road before he kills someone!"
Oh, and I forgot to mention that I was once run over by a cab in broad daylight (10 a.m.) in the financial district. Nobody stopped to help. No witnesses. He was turning onto market while looking down new montgomery for fares at the palace. The cab driver attempted to drive off and leave me laying in the middle of market street @ montgomery and to top it off he didn't even report it to dispatch. I called him later and he offered to take me "for a drink" to discuss it.
Yes, I got a settlement after 5 years of physical therapy and back surgery. Their in-house lawyer's defense was that I staged it. Yep, I always knew how to fly but hid it from the world until that day. When opportunity strikes ... ;-)
I just thought of another memorable one. It was back in 98 or 99 and I had a friend visiting from the east coast. I already heard the myth that if you spot the cabbie an extra $25 bucks they'll go airborne down a steep hill.
We were coming up Franklin and at some point I asked if he would gun it and catch some air - half joking, half serious. I forget exactly which cross street it was - around Clay or Washington - but he speeds up and lifts the front end off the ground then we hit hard and bounced for a bit. That is my friends lasting impression of SF - wild and crazy.
here's 2 more places to catch air:
3 wheels off the ground: bush street, just past stockton. get in the far right lane, right after the parking garage. i