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Today in The Gate, we happened upon Peter Hartlaub's article on "Breakup Songs to Die For." Reminiscent of Nick Hornby's classic, High Fidelity, Hartlaub puts together his list of great breakup songs and the criteria for what makes these songs so great.
1. "A truly great breakup song should be filled with so much rage that the subject could include it as Exhibit A in his or her restraining order." Hartlaub cites "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morisette as an example, which -- try as we might -- we couldn't beat. We'd be lying if we said we haven't sung this song once or twice in our car, at the top of our lungs, with the windows rolled up.
2. "A good breakup song should also cycle wildly between moments of false sincerity, emotional instability and self-pity." Hartlaub goes with "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" by Paul Simon. Well, if Hartlaub is going to start off with pop musician Alanis Morisette, then we'll keep going with that and pull out Lily Allen's "Smile" as an example of this. Allen cycles between self-pity, crazy "...you messed up my mental health" and some serious, serious schadenfreude.
3. "Groveling is another hallmark of great breakup music." Phil Collins' "Against All Odds" is the clear winner here. We cry on the inside when we hear this song.
Altogether, we thought Hartlaub's five picks were great. Personally, we used to cry ourselves to sleep with anything Coldplay, especially "Warning Sign" before we moved onto "Angry Breakup Music." Like listening to Linkin Park's Hybrid Theory while running furiously on a treadmill at the gym, post-breakup. Err. But we digress.
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But what about the incredibly relieved and happy? My vote's for Mighty Lester's "Sorry Didn't Do It"
Where was Prodigy's Firestarter? That's the ultimate break-up song
My faves are the doubleshot by Jeff Buckley, both on the same album ("Grace"). "Last Good-Bye" from the point of view of the guy doing the dumping, and "Lover You Should Have Come Over," presumably from the point of view of the same guy, who is hoping that now that the dumping is over, they can start with the post-break-up sex.
"No Children" by The Mountain Goats.
"better things" by massive attack featuring tracey thorn:
"you say the magic's gone, well i'm not a magician,
you say the spark is gone, well get an electrician,
save your line about needing to be free
all that's bullshit, baby, you just want rid of me"
(that's just how i sing along, lyrics may actually be different!)
"I Wanna Be Around" by Tony Bennett. Classic, classy snark delivered with elegance to boot.
'One' by U2 always felt like a breakup song to me, though I know there are other interpretations of the lyrics.
"Don't Smoke in Bed" Nina Simone's scorchingly sarcastic song of advice to her ex.
"The Jeep Song" by the Dresden Dolls, so good, so true.