February 14, 2008
How Acceptable is it to Park Your Car in the Middle of Valencia?
The driver of this W123 Mercedes (chariot of the urban hipster, looks to be a 300CD model with a full set of vintage dog dish hubcaps, hastily converted to run on used cooking oil?) is getting either an early Valentine's Day card or a citation for parking in the middle of the damn street. Is the tow truck on its way? Larger photo here
Where else but San Francisco do people feel it's remotely acceptable to park in the middle lane of a heavily trafficked street, such as Valencia?
See an aerial photo and recite the Parker's Pledge, after the jump.
Here's an aerial photo showing 20 cars in a row, which has to be some kind of record.
It must be tough out there because these parkers run the risk of getting towed and being called knuckleheads or smurfholes.
Some feel that it's O.K. to park in the middle lane of Valencia on Sundays "in theory." Apparently nearby Guerrero is a safer bet as it's in a different category of the various types of guerrilla parking. Choose wisely.
All together now: We declare our right on this earth to park our cars within 50 feet of our favorite coffee shops, to be drivers, to be respected as drivers, on this earth, in the Mission, where we intend to find parking wherever we can by any means necessary.
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Man, and I always thought there was some traffic loophole or whatnot that allowed people to park in the middle lane on Dolores. All this time they were just being major assholes! Who knew? Let me just say I still don't regret moving away from the Mission.
Do the people who double-park at church on Sunday get towed/ticketed too? I'm guessing they started the whole trend.
My favorite extra-legal SF parking tradition is the "churchgoers can double-park on Sundays" rule. Does that happen anywhere else?
Two things:
The Guerrero/Dolores lane parking is a side-effect of special concessions given to churches. Mix at will with the separation of church and state, but that squares take advantage of this loophole is fine by me. Make the godheads walk and call it mortification.
Parking in the idiot lane of Valencia is acceptable for bridge-and-tunnelers, but anybody who lives here knows that it's a ripe case of stupid waiting to flare up at any moment if you do it.
The worst are the jerks who park on the sidewalk and force everyone in the neighborhood -- people pushing strollers, seniors with their groceries -- to struggle past into the street. If you challenge them, they'll say "It's my driveway," or "Go around."
Unfortunately, the City doesn't care. DPT will send traffic control officers out twice to ticket for residential permit parking violations (they have to check twice because it's time-limited), which may inconvenience the one driver who needs that space. Meanwhile, they sail past hunks of metal privatizing the public space used by pedestrians.
How about the churchgoers on Saturday and Sunday who double parks on Bush "Puppet" street? I know other churches on Bush or next to Bush that don't double park.
Ticket em' all! If DPT can nail all those UPS and FedEx delivery trucks, then they should go after churchgoers too.
one person starts parking on that median and then dozens more follow. i don't know what's up with that. i tried it once, about 7 years ago for a few minutes. my spidey senses for dpt approaching kicked in and i ran to move mine before they got me.
it's just endemic of the huge problem we all love to ignore. you cannot force people to ride muni or wait for the never coming cab on a weekend.
but we continue to keep our heads in the sand about the problem and just hope it will go away.
great policy!
The "Jesus Parking" isn't limited to the Christians on Valencia and Guerreo, you can see this around the synagogue on Dolores on Fridays as well.
Ticket 'em all, let God sort 'em out.
I remember a story a week or so ago in the chronicle that highlighted the fact that teachers are getting tickets because they have nowhere to park except in 1-hour parking spots and they have to dash out of class to move their cars.
Why does the DPT have such a bug up their asses about harassing teachers, but people going to church get a free pass?
doesn't make sense to me....
I remember a story a week or so ago in the chronicle that highlighted the fact that teachers are getting tickets because they have nowhere to park except in 1-hour parking spots and they have to dash out of class to move their cars.
Why does the DPT have such a bug up their asses about harassing teachers, but people going to church get a free pass?
doesn't make sense to me....
Where Would Jesus Park?
Dead slow,
A ticket to hell, eh?
Hee hee.
Interesting point Tony.
I can say the same for my fellow cheapskate students at SFSU who try every day to drive around Parkmerced to find a parking space and avoid a 1 or 2 hour parking violation. Come on... $5 for all day at the campus garage aint that bad.
or, tony, why don't the teachers just take the bus. then they won't have the "keep reading kids while i go move my car" moment.
Why can't people go to churches close to where they live?
kimmie - Many SF teachers cannot afford to live in the city and therefore drive in to work from faraway places. MUNI doesn't work for everyone.
The Valencia shared median serves absolutely no purpose. No one has to make a mid-block left turn b/c there are practically no driveways. And Valencia traffic isn't that heavy to anyway. Why not let people park there? It calms traffic, reduces bike lane weaving, and provides more parking for Valencia businesses. Middle road parking gives Valencia a sort of European, free, improvised feel.
Not sure how far back this goes but during the dot com boom they only ticketed and it was only like $14, so the dot comer making six figures had no problem paying $14 for parking. After the dot com bust,SF doubled the ticket amount to raise revenues and increased enforcement. I assume the tow fees raise additional money for the city as well as the towing company.
Not sure how far back this goes but during the dot com boom they only ticketed and it was only like $14, so the dot comer making six figures had no problem paying $14 for parking. After the dot com bust,SF doubled the ticket amount to raise revenues and increased enforcement. I assume the tow fees raise additional money for the city as well as the towing company.
I have no problem with "Jesus Parking". Such parking privileges should be extended to other special events through a permit process requiring the applicant to show traffic, transit, bicycle and pedestrian operations are not significantly impacted. If you schedule your event for 6AM on a Sunday morning, I think you can make the case to close down a lane of an underused street too.
I call bullshit on the "teachers don't earn much" argument. Every teacher I know makes plenty of coin. It's just institutionalized pity that makes them constantly moan about it. Let them ride the bus with their disgustigly racist kids, we all have to. It's "Let's frighten the white people day" every day on the 38.
Kimmie: Have you ever tried to carry five classes worth of grading, books, gradebook, attendance book, laptop (because classrooms don't have computers), etc. on a MUNI bus full of the kids you were teaching all day?
If the Sunday "Jesus parking" is in fact city policy, however un-official, do you think we could sue to force the city to do an Environmental Impact Report (EIR) like they are having to do for the bike plan?
I've always been amused at the immense sense of entitlement people have nowadays....esp. when it comes to parking...some neighborhoods do suck (Nob Hill especially) but when I had a car and commuted to the Peninsula, and came back into the city, I always found a parking spot.
True, it would not always be exactly in front of the store or restaurant, but if you're not an idiot, and learn how to park a car PROPERLY and learn how to find a spot in the City (this isn't Millbrae, people), you can usually find one if you try hard enough. It's funny how people in SF are like people in LA and freak out if they have to walk 2 blocks to their final destination. Parking in the middle of Valencia is just plain stupid, both for safety and DPT reasons.
Also, what is up with the police cars always double parked outside the station at Eddy and Jones?
So I recently noticed a new (to me) double parking deal - the fire station on California, near Gough - in the mornings, they double park the fire trucks in one of the lanes of traffic, while the firefighters cars are all in the driveway /garage of the firehouse! Do they leave them there all day? Why do they do this?
Yeah, I heard they were going to film the tv show "Parking Wars" in San Francisco but they couldn't actually find any DPT officers to film. Maybe when they get around to filming "I ain't feelin' it today" and "It's mah break" they can come back to SF.
fizz: how do you define "plenty" exactly? because teachers at my old high school made no more than $60k a year in 2002 (most MUCH less, to the tune of $48k), which is NOT institutionalized pity, it's insufficient income to live without a roommate. so yes, i had adult teachers who had roommates. most people i know who make that much have second jobs. a teacher's second job is grading homework.
i have a funny story about "Jesus Parking" from when i lived next to a baptist church on post & baker. the double-parked cars would block off all the legally parked cars, once including mine. i went up to the usher at the front of the church and asked him if there's anything he can do about getting the owner of the car that was blocking mine, and he flat out said "No. I don't know whose car that is." well, why can't you just go inside the church and do an annousement? would the owner of an illegally parked silver lexus kindly move their car so that the neighbors can, say, go to work? "No ma'am, I can't disturb the church service." so i called DPT. DPT never showed up. luckily i drive a jeep, so i just drove out through the curb. my neighbor and his corola had to WAIT.
Parking in the middle of the road is common in Philadelphia on Broad Street. That's what the middle is marked off for on Broad. It's not and "only in San Francisco" thing, thanks. If you don't use that space, it's a waste of pavement, don't you think, because then NO ONE is using it for anything.
Yeah, I've seen this kinda crap in New York, Chicago, even parts of Minneapolis. Anywhere parking is a premium.
citi_zen: As far as I know the 8AM shuffle has been happening at that fire station since the dawn of time. The firefighters park their cars in the back of the station and then put the fire trucks in front. When the shift changes they have to disgorge all the cars and install the ones belonging to the next shift. Westbound traffic on California is pretty light and there's four lanes, so who cares, right? One block west there's dozens of double parked SUVs at the day school.
The churches feel they have the right to double park like that. They have some church-paid civilian parking enforcement guy and cones marking the first and last car belonging to the congregation. Anyone outside the cones can get a ticket. (I need to glue a pair of those magic cones to the front and back bumpers of my car!)
The DPT metermaids (who "eat their young", according to some graffiti I have seen) would never ignore a such a sweet collection of densely packed and ticket-able cars unless they were told otherwise.
I would really love to know who is paying who for the privilege of clogging Dolores and Guerrero every Sat and Sun.
The churches feel they have the right to double park like that. They have some church-paid civilian parking enforcement guy and cones marking the first and last car belonging to the congregation. Anyone outside the cones can get a ticket. (I need to glue a pair of those magic cones to the front and back bumpers of my car!)
The DPT metermaids (who "eat their young", according to some graffiti I have seen) would never ignore a such a sweet collection of densely packed and ticket-able cars unless they were told otherwise.
I would really love to know who is paying who for the privilege of clogging Dolores and Guerrero every Sat and Sun.
fizz: every teacher in my department (ages 26-38) are still in some way subsidized by their parents (and not for outrageous lifestyle perks, more along the lines of car insurance, electricity, phone, etc.) and those who are single all have to have roommates because they cannot afford to live alone.
i dont know why those people park in the valencia median anymore, since there is a perfectly good bike lane to park in and its less of a walk to the sidewalk.
ohmygolly - if you park in the valencia median you might get towed. If you park in the bike lane, you WILL get keyed.
Wake up Iris - driving to work solo, if you live in SF, *IS* an outrageous lifestyle perk. So is living alone in a place like SF - the only friend I have who lived alone before 40 was a trustafarian.
If the teachers in SF aren't resourceful enough to carpool, how can they be resourceful enough to handle a room of 10 year olds?
What about the church goers who double park in a bike line of all places on Golden Gate and Masonic? Isn't that some sort of double whammy, or are they protected by the DPT divinity too?
Also, while I think teachers should be paid more, I only make 20k/year as a retail goon and live quite comfortably with a roommate. Someone making twice as much should do just fine by themselves. And this is in the City proper.
murphstahoe--Speaking thus you have obviously never been a teacher, so I forgive you. You know not of what you speak. I also doubt that you'd be resourceful enough to teach a 40+ urban freshmen health, working an extra 40 unpaid hours so that you can do your job with a decent level of quality.
@JBrown: I see what you're saying, but did you have to pay +$20k to get credentialed (if you go the public university route) and then fork over another $5k+ every 8 years to maintain your ability to work?
JBrown: not everyone is comfortable with living a 20k/year city lifestyle, which to me is pretty bare bones. Also, I recommend you aim higher.
Murphstahoe: imagine your life thusly - you get zero time to yourself through you entire day, except the precious half an hour or so you're driving to and from work. Imagining? OK. Now do you still feel you need to criticize?
Pretty much anyone who is currently ganging up on teachers needs to go volunteer at a local school, ASAP. That'll change your tune real fast.
ever check out 7th st. between brannan and bryant? the golden gate meat company has some sort of mafia-like hold over this block where they double and triple park with inpunity as little fork lifts zip BACKWARDS from between the trucks INTO the traffic trying to pass the double/triple parked vehicles. it's insanity in plastic hair caps and butcher's aprons.
HERE'S the KICKER: gg meat company is around the corner from the hall of injustice and directly across the street from the DPT office! i have hopped out of my car and asked for DPT officers in their go-carts to ticket these trucks and they refuse. i have gone INTO the DPT office to ask for an officer to come ticket these vehicles to free the flow of traffic and there was no result.
golden gate meat company's building and loading dock/zone is way too small for the amount of business they do. they need a dock with a parking area around it to accommodate all those trucks. by allowing their trucks to block numerous traffic lanes up the length of the block, the DPT has saved gg meat company THOUSANDS, maybe MILLIONS in rent they DO NOT pay on a larger facility.
i used to drive this way to work every day and it used to make my head feel like it was going to explode. i live 4 blocks from where i work now and i walk or ride my bike every day. i feel so much better.
Great stories, everybody. I could read these all night.
gogobooty [what a great name].
maybe GG Meat IS MAFIA and is paying off the city, while they process Jimmy Hoffa sausage products...??
The church crowd also gets away with it because there are less traffic enforcement officers on duty on Sundays.
FYi the "eat their young" line is a quote from 1997 by Bill Maher, former director of the DPT and ex-supe.
mariconsoy:
i have no problem with ggmc paying the dpt for a loading zone, buisnesses do it all the time. i believe, however, there is metered parking along the curb, not yellow paint, so somehow ggmc has a special privilige of parking in traffic lanes (blocking 2, 3, or even all 4 lanes of traffic as they wish.) i didn't know that dispensation could be bought. dpt should open the bidding process and let everyone who wants apply for triple parking immunity stickers or something.
then again, perhaps the go-cart dpt people have simply been threatened with a meat hook in a freezer if they ticket or tow a ggmc truck.
ya never know.
p.s. thanks for the nice words.