Swells By The Numbers

Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 74.

Total number of people pictured whom we recognize: 7 (after some deliberation, we decided not to include Steve Kawa because we didn't recognize him with his new haircut at all.)

Minority count: 7 (9.5%).

Number of pictures included in the minority count that are of Willie Brown: 4.

Hats, capes, tiaras: 9, 0, 0. (SF Giants opening day skewed your hat stats a bit.)

Getty v. Traina: 1-0, and the 1 is Gavin at a birthday party for Willie Brown. Did neither Gordon, Vanessa, Billy, Trevor, Alexis, nor Dede make it out to Opening Day?

Swells By The Number shoutouts!: One! In CBig's "Opening Day By The Numbers." How thrilling to see our own name in boldface print!

Our favorite Opening Day By The Numbers number: .5, describing the size of the itsy-bitsy pregame burger C.Big consumed.

Our second favorite Opening Day By The Numbers number: 1.5, describing the number of margaritas C.Big consumed.

Pisces v. Aries: 2-2 (Willie Brown and former Chron society editor Grace Prien on the fish side, and Willie Brown squeeze Sonya Molodetskaya and Giants owner Larry Baer on the ram.)

Number of Jaguars purchased: 1, by W. Brown for S. Molodetskaya's birthday present. We hope it had one of those big bows on the roof; we love those.