Swells By The Numbers

Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 65.

Number of people pictured whom we recognize: 1 (Frank Jordan).

Minority count: 3 (4.6%).

Hats, capes, tiaras: 1, 0, 0.

Eyepatches, leis, shrugs/stoles/shawls: 1, 5, 3.

Getty v. Traina: 3-1.

Stanlee Gatti count: 1.

Number of people pictured with mouth agape: 1, at the SFMOMA Wayne Thiebaud lunch.

Number of artists listed as being featured on Gordon Getty's vanity project, "Songs by American Composers": 7, most of whom waived or reduced their fees to participate. Doesn't it seem like if you're recording something with rich-as-Croesus Gordon Getty, you'd raise your fees?

Proportion of Trainas to Gettys on the planning committee of the Mid-Winter Gala for the Fine Arts Museum Junior Committee: 1:1 (Trevor: Vanessa).

Proportion of rejected Traina ideas to rejected Stanlee Gatti ideas: 1:2. Stanlee Gatti suggested serving spotted dick (British pudding), and using 250 deep fryers with 400 servers for a french fry concoction. Trevor Traina wanted the tablecloths to be trimmed with lace and fitted really tight on the tables -- he said it was like knickers but it sounds kind of like diapers to us!