Total number of people pictured in this week's Swells society column: 67.

Number of people pictured whose names we recognize: 8 (Trainas, Gettys, and figures in local politics only, including on-the-way-out Steve Kawa).

Minority count: 4 (6%).

Hats, capes, tiaras: 0, 0, 0 (but Gavin's hair looks a little funny).

Getty v. Traina: 6-12. It's Dede Wilsey's Christmas party, that's why!!! Dede had laryngitis but wore Chanel and had the best hors d'oeuvres in town (onion puffs, lobster, a caviar and salmon checkerboard, water chestnuts wrapped in bacon). "This is the best party of the year," said one attendee.

Ranking of Danielle Steele's new perfume line, according to ex-husband John Traina: 2, right behind Britney Spears's scent.

Save The Dates: 4 (Google's Larry Page is hosting a party for the X Prize on March 3, George Lucas is the grand marshal for the Rose Parade, Todd Traina's Sundance movie premiere, and an upcoming party at the SFMOMA). Bonus number: 12,000 Ewoks are expected at the Rose Parade.

Stanlee Gatti count: 2 (attending Dede's Christmas party, cited for his previous party at the SFMOMA.)

Vanessa and Billy Getty count: 0. (not attending Dede's Christmas party.)

Charlotte Maillard Shultz count: 4, for hosting the Protocol Office's party at the Gettys' place. Welcome back, girl! Her quote, describing husband George Shultz: "My secretary, who is not that good at taking dictation but likes to garden."