The Ultimate Pillowfighting Championship
In training for the first ever pillow fight club at Justin Herman Plaza yesterday evening, we upped our protein intake and worked on our cardio and conditioning. We honestly did not know what to expect, all we knew is that we didn't want to be out of breath, like so many laps around the school yard we completed in elementary school.
Arriving thirty minutes early, we started warming up, roadwork, push-ups, a couple of rounds of shadowboxing. Sure, we do Muay Thai, but for all intents and purposes we are an embarrassment to the sport, and a career in combat sports will never open up for us. We figured that this will be only our chance to shine. This will be our Rocky moment, our thrilla in Manila.
SFist Paolo, contributing
Ten minutes left before down pillow hell is unleashed, the mood is tense, as people crowd into the Plaza, armed with pillows of all shapes, sizes, and colors, the media nervously shows up, not knowing what to expect, bewildered bystanders shooting awkward glances. The protocol says to wait until the Ferry Building clock strikes six before the fight can commence, but a contingent by the fountain preemptively start giving each other the business, to which everyone else from the Plaza could only reply with fevered dashing, pillow swinging all the way.
Those not wanting to participate in the fight took up a perimeter, snapping photos, videotaping the affair or just standing by watching the mayhem, in some post-modern day gladiatorial arena filled with messenger bags, someone dressed as Santa, and someone in a mobile kissing booth. Fifteen minutes in, and the liberated feathers and down stuffing floating in the air are beginning to get in our eyes, our mouths, we're starting to feel the strain of being knocked in the head with a pillow numerous amount of times, our arms start to tire.
But we get a second wind, it's not about knocking anyone out with a sleeping apparatus, it's about enjoying this moment we have with all these people wallowing in the absolute positivity and community we have created if for a finite amount of time, we can't give up now, can't sit out. We can't do it for us, we have to do it for everyone else who showed up, give it eleventeen billion percent of us, as our favorite philosopher Andrew WK says, "'Cause we were nothing but kids on top/Never gonna stop/We never let down/Keep our heads held high/Never gonna die/'Cause we gotta keep it alive". The feathers and down stuffing turned into a venerable blizzard of feathers and stuffing, on par with a month and a half delayed Christmas miracle in San Francisco. Ironic movie-quote yelps echoed though the crowd in one voice, above the clamor of battle, most notable, "MY NAME IS KUNTA KINTE" and "SWEEP THE LEG".
All of a sudden, a new meme emerged, naptime. Five pillow fight participants lay down on the floor in the dissipating maelstrom, multiplied exponentially, until most of the plaza was embracing the naptime meme. And as everyone crowded around the nappers, the official pillow fight was deemed over, jubilant chants of pillow fight, nap time, and cheers for the event swept though the exuberant crowd. On top of that, participants willingly picked up whatever feathers and down stuffing was left in the plaza after the event, which warmed our cold heart, and our disdain for humanity went down a little.
This event would be on par with the Hindenburg exploded rainbows and Lucky Charms, and instead of cowering at the humanity of it all, people got up and danced around with each other, smiling and cheering. We will give up everything to become a professional pillow fighter.
